SUICIDE SQUAD REVIEW: STOP DC-ING AROUND!!!
Years ago, I discovered comic books. Okay that sounds too dramatic, like somehow the very concept of comic books originated from some action or omission on my part. That is not the case. What I mean is that comic books came to be a part of my life and I’ve been hooked ever since. Would I call myself a Supergeek or fanatic? No. But like any lover of comic books, I’ve steadily built up my knowledge of both the Marvel and DC universes and can hold my own in most conversations on the subjects.
Just as with any pastime, one must choose a corner or a side. U.K. Premiership Football fans have their ManU vs. Arsenal vs. Chelsea, NBA fans have the Cavalier vs. Knights feud and Baseball fans are constantly in a RedSox-Yankees squabble. The Comic book crew must often choose between Marvel and DC. If you’re confused about which is which, I’ll make it easy – Xmen and Avengers are Marvel, while Justice League and Suicide Squad are DC. Easy enough right?
Now. I’m just gonna say this. I lean towards DC. Why, you ask? One reason – The Batman. In a gritty contrast to the mutants and metahumans of Marvel, having Batman as the undisputed face of DC boasts the notion of an extraordinary individual, who has constantly beaten the odds with nothing more than his wits and gadgets. It reminds us that you don’t need powers to do some good.
But there’s a problem. Again I do not wish to mince words so I’ll just say it – Marvel is kicking our ass! Yes, I say “our” because I count myself as part of something greater than myself – a belief that the grit, depth and intricacies of the of DC characters back-stories and abilities outweigh the glitz and extravaganza of Marvel. Any DC fan will tell you. We want more than witty punch lines and elaborate costumes. That’s all Marvel. What we DC fans pride ourselves on; what we want…is a story.
And that, readers, is the essential reason why Suicide Squad failed us. It lacked a good story. In an attempt to maximize revenue, particularly from the PG audience, it’s clear that the film’s creators opted to reduce grit and gore in favour of overplayed punchlines and near theatrical displays. I’ll try and make this brief but I want to go through some of the reasons why Suicide Squad did itself in. Stay with me, people.
- The Joker should’ve been the Villian. You know it. I know it. Yeah, yeah we’re dealing with bad guys. But let’s face it. The Joker is in a league of his own when it comes to villainy. Cunning, crafty, strategic and pure evil! In case you’re thinking, “Why would Harley Quinn ever cross the Joker?”, the answer is simple. The Joker and Harley share a common insanity and are notably passionately in love. But when push comes to shove, the Joker readily abandons Harley if faced with capture. He always comes back for her, which naturally fuels her undying loyalty, but on at least two occasions in the film he leaves her. The fury of a woman scorned is worse than any witch could muster and would’ve worked for great screenplay.

Awwwwww
- Unneccessary characters. Why oh why was Enchantress even in the film? The Suicide Squad, unlike Marvel’s Insidious Six of Spiderman, is not limited to six members. Naturally, because of the expendable nature of the team and the dangerous nature of their missions, members keep dying and are replaced. The creators could’ve picked from KGBeast, Black Spider, Killer Frost, or King Shark – much better characters with more intriguing back stories. Instead they gave us a witch who dances when working magic (cringe) and prefers fighting mortals using swords rather than spells- Ugh! At least they killed off lame Slipknot early enough. When I mentioned Slipknot being in the film, my friend Mimi asked “Isn’t that a band?” Valid question.

Really?
- It doesn’t HAVE to be a laugh a minute. What is this obsession with making the audience laugh? What is this? Seinfeld? We want grit and we want action. With a HINT of sarcastic humour. Deadshot’s early crack about raining down on someone “like the Holy Ghost” is great, but Rick Flag hugging him after Enchantress is defeated, not so much. Grit and gore can be just as funny and works well with dark characters such as these. Fox and Warner Bros.’ Adaptation of Watchmen proved as much in 2009. Stop trying to be funny and focus on depth.

- Total letdown with Harley Quinn. First off, What was with Harley Quinn’s costume? There’s already been a stir in the media about the overt sexualization and misogyny portrayed in the Film, and while I personally despise all forms of feminist rhetoric, I have to agree that Harley Quinn in bum shorts and a t-shirt is just tacky! Her signature jester costume would have made us take her more seriously as the Joker’s sinister other half. Also, Harley’s psychosis and combat training holds its own even alongside the amazons of Themascara, so the film’s portrayal was at best subdued – big disappointment there.

I could go on but there’s only so much time in the world. Captain Boomerang had only TWO boomerangs!!! The film’s apparently jumbled story-line often left people squinting at the screen in confusion. And the erratic nature of the entire Squad was not really captured. They’re bad guys. Egos. Testosterone. There should’ve been more fighting between them. (Okay, guess I had room for a few more complaints).
I’d love to get everyone’s comments (especially contradictions) on this one so please send them in. Till next time, Houselites up!







