A sequel?

13w0d today. Second trimester. 1/8758 = risk for Trisomy 21, according to the NT scan. According to the u/s technician, there might be something dangling between the legs, or not. Difficult to say this early. I’m doing fine. Hungry. All the time. Imagine Obelix. Only more hungry. I’m sick again. An ordinary cold, still annoying. Especially since I can’t/won’t medicate myself.

I told my boss an nearest colleagues this week about the pregnancy and people are exited. Very different to my old job when I told them I was expecting 3 years ago. Apparently people are so excited (or not, I haven’t really decided on which) that I am congratulated on being pregnant by a distant colleague (very nice American guy), who’s in the board of directors. Maybe they are afraid of loosing me for a year after the birth? Maybe they are planning how to replace me during my year-long maternity leave? Maybe, eh, I don’t know? Why would me being pregnant be something to be discussed during a management meeting? Whatever.

Today, we got to see the bean inside of me again. It always moves me and makes me speechless. Husband could finally follow along, since daughter was not sick, and was extremely happy as well. We got some fantastic views, some waving, hand-sucking, kicking. Lovely. Everything is right-on-track and apparently fine. The u/s technician was fabulous, and did a really good job in assuring us that thus far everything is fine. The next u/s is scheduled for around March 1st.

I am still neglecting the impact that the chickenpox could have made on the bean inside of me. There is absolutely nothing I can do anyways. We will know more during the next u/s, but only know for certain once the bean no longer is inside of me. If all goes well, there is a newborn in our lives by July 28, 2011. I’m happy!

Yes, an update.

I got chickenpox and I became really sick. Really sick. For about 5 days. I took the antiviral medicine which I had a prescription for and that I am told is shortening the time one is sick, though not the intensity. I was also told that pregnant women are amongst the ones that get chickenpox the worst, due to the lower immune defense. On the upside, I am better now, and won’t be able to get chickenpox again. On the downside – where to start – my gynacologist is slighly concerned about the fact that I had a severe virus infection during the first trimester of the pregnancy and has ordered for additional testing at the 18 weeks u/s. Also it appears that daughter and I have infected at least two other kids which both were really sick during the Christmas holidays.

I had another u/s on the 29th of December (was after the pox), which showed our little embryo apparently alive and well, but as mentioned we will have to do some additional testing in about 7 weeks time at the 18 weeks u/s.

Symptom-wise, despite having felt like shit during the pox season, I am ok. I am so tired, sleeping whenever possible. I have turned completely anti-social, but I am hopeful that that will pass within the next month or so. Another recurring (since my pregnancy with daughter) symptom is the morning sickness, at night. It’s manageable though, no vomiting, just nausea. Food cravings, so far nothing really, although I have started to dislike garlic, my favorite food item. Can’t eat garlic, in fact, I’m not keen on Italian food right now at all, which makes me a bit sad, since my favorite food ALWAYS is Italian.

We have told our families about the pregnancy, and they are thrilled. I haven’t said anything at work yet, but will do so once the first trimester is over in two weeks.

Too tired to write much, so here’s a short list.

– Today u/s at ART clinic. One fetus, measuring 8w4d. Right on track. Very happy. Amazing. Unreal almost, since I hardly have any symptoms.

– I feel good. Much better than what I remember I did when I was expecting our daughter. Fatigue, bitchiness & pelvic pain being the ‘only’ apparent signs of a starting pregnancy.

– Daughter has chickenpox. I haven’t had chickenpox. At least not that anybody knows of. I have a prescription for antiviral medicine in case I find a red spot on me. I’m trying not to panic, I’m succeeding ok with it, mostly because I am too tired to get too whined-up.

– Christmas coming up. Merry Christmas to you all!

About two and a half weeks after the initial positive test I can report that things still look positive here.

The wall of tiredness I was waiting for last week has hit. Yawn. I am so tired, almost all the time.

Also, the pelvic girdle pain I had when I was pregnant with our daughter has returned, more painful than what I remember it was back then. I’m trying to stay relaxed, but I am a bit freaking out thinking that I might possibly have to deal with this pain the next 30+weeks.

Otherwise there are no major symptoms to report.

We have a date for the first u/s, December 16, which will be at our ART clinic.

We’ll have another u/s on December 29 at our future midwife’s office. During that appointment we’ll also schedule a NT scan probably in the middle of January.  Our first prenatal appointment with the midwife will be on February 8. You might wonder why I already have all those things booked, when nothing is certain yet. The reason is simple. This country is still in the middle of a major baby boom and getting appointments with a midwife or u/s technician are as difficult to get as an audience with the crown princess.

Next HPT on wednesday.

So, I took another HPT yesterday. Still very much positive. Very happy. Symptomwise, there is not much to report. I am waiting for the wall of tiredness to hit, other than that I am almost forgetting that I’m pregnant. Almost. This weekend I will pick up all my pregnancy books from the attic. Maybe they will make this more real?

Next test, next week!

POAS this morning again. Still positive. Good.

I have a really bad cold and feel terrible, but still that doesn’t stop me from sitting with a big grin at my desk at work and daydream. I’m happy. Very happy!

But, I am trying to be realistic. Which isn’t so difficult considering one of my friends had a mi*scarr*iage yesterday at 9 weeks pregnant. Lot’s of things can happen and though we hope all goes well, I know better than not to prepare for “worst case scenario” at all times.

So, what’s next? The clinic wants me to call to confirm a positive test at 17dpI*UI, which is on the weekend, when the clinic is closed. So, I’ll call Monday – 19dpI*UI. In absence of any kinds of blood draws to confirm pregnancy (if all seems well), I think they will book me in for an u/s at ca. 8 weeks, which is some time in the middle of December.

Until then, if all goes well, obsessive POAS once a week to ease mind will commence.

So, I couldn’t contain myself and POAS this morning at 13dpIUI.

Positive.

CD 24 today. Last cycle I started bleeding on that day. Not this cycle. It doesn’t mean much, but at least we got further this time than last cycle. Which is positive. Obsessive wiping (after every pee) has commenced. The wait continues. Less and less patiently.

Hello darkness my old friend…

When preparing dinner tonight I felt really down, low, defeated. Not sure why exactly, but I think it’s a combination of things.

For one, the dark season has started. Every year I struggle with the onset of winter. The darkness. The wet cold. It’s depressing. I’ve worn my winter jacket for a month now and will most probably wear it for another 5 months, if I’m lucky. That’s just depressing. Winter is too long in this country.

Yesterday we did our second dI*UI. Things haven’t been as easy this cycle as they had been during the previous one. The almost euphoric optimism I felt during the previous cyle has worn off. It’s gone. Instead I feel, ehh, blehhh. Doom is looming.

I had four mature follicles, two on the left ovary and two on the right, in addition to on larger growth (35mm) on the left ovary. Larger growth, you wonder? I did too. Apparently I never completely ovulated last cycle, so that cycle was always doomed. In this country there is a recommendation to do I*UIs only with 1 or 2 follicles. In this family there is an agreement to do an I*UI only if there is 1 follicle (you have asked why we only want to have 1 follicle, and I will explain that in another post). But after some short deliberation we decided not to reduce the amount of follices on the right side and instead only to remove all the follicles on the left ovary and leave the two nicely matured follicles on the right ovary in tact.

So, it’s done. dI*UI was done, including follice reduction (it’s done the same was as follicle retrieval during I*V*F).

What do I feel? I don’t know. I don’t trust what I feel. If all goes well, I’ll test on November 17.Until then I’ll put my hands over my ears and sing lalala.

November 17. That also the day husband and I have been invited for a get-to-know-each-other evening to our clinic to meet other couples who have don*or con*ceived children, to talk about how and when to tell your child. Interesting. I really want to write more about that in another post as well.

Wish us luck.

Crimson red flood. Not good. Paired with cramping. Bad. It’s over.

The optimist has left the building. What was I thinking? Stupid stupid me. I got a dose of reality. I’d be lying saying I wasn’t disappointed. I am deeply, my gut feeling, intuition, call it whatever, was off. So totally. Next cycle I will be more realistic.

Call clinic tomorrow to start new cycle. Sigh.