Mexican (?) pastries and a cute boy

•February 17, 2009 • 1 Comment

So E served his mission in El Salvador and LOVED these pastries. I guess buying them for a quarter was a real treat down there? And for the freaking LIFE of me, I cannot remember what they are stinkin’ called. Anyways, he brought one over for me to try (after telling me how they are practically made of lard . . .). Long story short, I didn’t end up really eating mine (nor did he his – the movie was too good or we were too full from dinner. Or something. I really don’t remember). So in the morning when Gabers woke up . . . I saw a big sugar covered lard full pastry. Apparently, looked darn good because he gobbled it up!!! We had to take it in the car w/ us to daycare. Trying to take it out of his hands was like attempting to cut off his right pinky. Not possible really.

Gabe eating yumminess

Gabe eating yumminess

And on the topic of E, we had a fun Valentine’s Day. Got to make dinner for his rad old hippie of a dad 🙂 And I got conversation hearts that made me smile. And forgive the attempt at artistry of the picture . . . it was a conversation of hearts. I was attempting to portray that. But I’ve been kinda slackerish about my cameragey-ness. So the pic isn’t so rad. Suffice it to say, this Mr. E is a far better man than I’ve had privilege to know prior to, well, you catch my drift 😉

Conversationally adept hearts

Hope y’all had a great Valentine’s Day!! And if you’re in the mood to buy handmade and want to prevent me from buying this BEAUTIFUL skirt, you could support the artistry of Olivia. She’s amazing. And her skirts are beautiful (I have three *blush*). Really. Do it. Splurge 🙂

Posted in E

So did ya know?

•February 12, 2009 • 1 Comment

Spanish is a pretty rad language. But honestly, even radder when it’s being whispered in one’s ear.

Just sayin’ *wink*.

And sung Spanish is becoming a favorite of mine. Check out Mago de Oz. Or particularly, this amazingly epic song: La Cantata del Diablo Part 1 Part 2. Yes. Really. I meant epic. Ps. I didn’t watch the videos, so if they’re not so appropriate, don’t blame me please. The song is a diss to the crazy Spanish Catholicism that plagues the country . . . not a crude song or anything, but their CD cover for the CD is, well, interesting to put it simply lol.

And? I’m going to a concert on Friday night. Kalai. He’s amazing. Like really.E and I are going down. And I get to see Ash for the first time in months!!! Definitely stoked about said concert, Ms. Ash, and E. And stuff 🙂

No cuttage as of yet for those of y’all who are wondering. Not sure if it will be happening anytime soon. I’m uncomfortable with it. And the more I read, the more it seems this problem will self correct once his body is “manifying” if y’all catch my drift. Why push something that is going to happen naturally. Right? Right.

So, I’ll get some pictures up here soon, but wanted to just say hi. I miss having time for a blog. I love blogging. It’s like a big journaly regurgitation of said self. Quite comforting really. Maybe my March resolution can be to make time for it. After I start doing some sun salutations (yes, this girl is attempting yoga – we’ll see if I have the patience. Or desire to be that patient. Or something).

Ps. I need someone to tell me how fascinating Lost is this season so I’ll make the time to watch at least one of the series that has a stronghold on my DVR. I just added Dollhouse to my list . . . I’ll let y’all know how that is.

Kisses!

Posted in A Shah'ada Ramble

defying gravity

•January 31, 2009 • 1 Comment

Something has changed within me
Something is not the same
I’m through with playing by the rules
Of someone else’s game

…

I’m through accepting limits
‘Cause someone says they’re so

…

And if I’m flying solo
At least I’m flying free
To those who’d ground me
Take a message back from me
Tell them how I am defying gravity

-“Defying Gravity” Wicked The Musical

Posted in Poetry and Prose

penis cuttage . . .

•January 30, 2009 • 7 Comments

My oldest is getting his hole widened at the head of his penis. I know, weird topic, but I’m struggling. So forgive the weirdness.

He has something that starts w/ an “m”. Pretty much it means that he cannot empty his bladder fully/has to go potty often and this can cause future UTI’s and a thickening of the bladder muscle which can lead to bladder problems later.

Now this is when I being to struggle. Really. How necessary is this? Totally routine, easy, quick (like 30 minutes of numbing cream plus a 2 second snip plus a bandaid) procedure. But this is the reproductive organ we are talking about. Is this silly non-essential medical intervention? You know, the crap our medical system is FAMOUS for? Or is this something actually real?

To be honest, I don’t want to do it. But I don’t want my dude to be 15 and have incontinence problems because his mom was scared when he was a kid. Make sense? So of course when I try to get this info out of the doctor, he makes it sound like an all important procedure. Gr. I hate crap like this. I don’t like big decisions like this. And especially now that I’m a single mom . . . these decisions are TOTALLY on me. No stress, eh?

So seriously, as a mother, what the freak do I do? I pretty much just want to be told what to do. But then at the same time, don’t want to. Because I don’t want to do it. Why don’t we have all the answers again? Oh right . . . it’s a growing process 😀

Le Sigh. Penis cuttage-ish-ness sucks yo.

But anyways!! Sorry if that made anyone cringe. Any advice I’ll gladly take. Not that I’ll follow it, but I’ll read it 😀 Y’all know me by now . . .

And lastly? I must make this recipe soon. Oh, and this one. And? I’m going to make Bamya soon too. For a cool dude. Um, yea 🙂 Night!

Posted in The Chillaxin Children

Holy! Holy! Holy!

•January 26, 2009 • Leave a Comment

Holy the supernatural extra brilliant intelligent kindness of the soul!

Posted in Poetry and Prose

poem

•January 23, 2009 • 2 Comments

aged orange peel fingernails
softly lit brown eyes
every night he searches for the man in the moon
he knows looks over those who look to him
a warm breeze full of colors wafts by
while i watch his weathered hands mold the moon
allowing god to breathe new breath
into the lost and scarred soul he knows as his daughter
i stand outside
i watch you make life flourish
breathing purity into the shell of a girl
a girl sitting demurely at the edge
the dishonest distance of reality only hints at the union
of body and spirit

as the two merge, my view shifts
i smell the orange on my own lips
see through a warmer window
feel a rocky surface

and i breathe

Posted in Poetry and Prose

Renewed hope in a Palestinian state

•January 23, 2009 • Leave a Comment

I admit I spent every second in between calls today at work glued to CNN and the coverage it gave Obama. During my lunch, I was glued to his comments about the Middle East, Palestine, and Israel. I have tears in my eyes as I type this. I have hope. I really do. I believe he truly intends to work with world leaders to ensure a Palestianian state. I felt his unrest as he spoke of the 500 Palestinian civilians the Israeli army can claim as kills. I really believe him when he says he wants to keep Gaza open to ensure the flow of humanitarian supplies, efforts, peoples into a region wrought with poverty. I believe Obama. He truly has brought to me a renewed faith in a country I had all but lost hope in.

My thoughts are fragmented in regards to this awesomeness, but the fact that I’m so radly optimistic is something I couldn’t help but share.

Posted in Politics ...

Andrew and Allen are kinda opposites …

•January 21, 2009 • 5 Comments

“And you don’t want to be here in the future, so you say the present’s just a pleasant interruption to the past.”

– Konstantine by Something Corporate.

I’m kinda digging on the present right now … it’s a HUGE adventure! And when I say huge, I really mean that! It feels like everything is open to me and the only one limiting it is me (which we all know how well I can do that at times *blush*).

I went to the library yesterday, sans children, and grabbed some Ginsberg. That man and his beat poetry is something amazing. He writes some crazy stuff … but it’s all stuff that makes one think. And when I read his poetry, I wish more than I could express that I lived during the freedom of the 60’s. From II, he writes:

“The problem is isolation – there in the grave or here in the oblivion of light.”

That’s the biggest struggle of mine right now … I feel isolated, seperate, distanced from everything I used to hold onto. I feel alone. And alone for a crazy social girl like Shah’ada? Not good lol. Blogging, writing, talking, expressing is my panathea of the moment – the belief there are people reading, people who care what goes on in my life, people who are interested in my inane verbage … thank you for indulging my need 🙂

Posted in Poetry and Prose

And here I am …

•January 20, 2009 • 1 Comment

Thanks for visiting me here at my new blog – feels more comfortable here.

I am home from work today, gratefully watching the inauguration of Mr. Barack Obama. I am in awe of him, his faith, his optimism, his eloquence while speaking.

I’m reading “A Freewheelin’ Time” (it’s a memoir of the 60’s, Greenwich Village, and Bob Dylan and is freaking RAD), but this quote from it has struck me. I have read it over. And over. And over. And I wanted to share it …

“Who are we, if not a combination of experiences, information, books we have read, things imagined? Each life is an encyclopedia, a library, an inventory of objects, a series of styles, and everything can be constantly reshuffled and reordered in every conceivable way.” – Italo Calvino.

If nothing else, I can look at my trials as a compilation I can share with others. I can because I am. I am a strong, independent woman, even if the road *is* rocky right now 🙂

And, if you keep up with my blog for my kids, I’ll do my best to post about them too. It seems as though writing my story is the only way I can adequately explain, express, and understand myself and my life. Have a blessed day (isn’t that such a peaceful saying!?) …

Me cheesin' it!

Yes, it's true! I heart you!

Posted in A Shah'ada Ramble

 
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