2026-08-20 (Thursday) Reiwa8

I am tired this morning.

I slept last night, but I still do not feel refreshed this morning. I do not even feel like reading the newspaper. Even after breakfast, I still feel tired.

I am lying down now, thinking that if I can fall asleep, I will.

I started wondering why I am so tired.

I think it is not simply because of yesterday.

Since I fractured my left proximal humerus in June and had surgery at the Japanese Red Cross hospital, I have been struggling with one question: What should I do about rehabilitation after the surgery?

I am grateful that the Japanese Red Cross hospital performed the surgery for me.

But after the surgery, I was left wondering, “What am I supposed to do about rehabilitation?”

I believe I was told to come back for follow-up appointments one week later, one month later, three months later, six months later, one year later, and so on.

At those appointments, they take X-rays and check how the bone is healing.

But that was not all I wanted to know.

“How far can I move my arm?”

“What exercises should I do?”

“What should I do when it hurts?”

“Will my arm become stiff and unable to move properly?”

Those were the things I wanted to know.

At first, I was told to rest and not move my arm. Then, at some point, I was suddenly told to start moving it.

I was confused.

I had kept my arm still as instructed, and suddenly I was supposed to move it. But I did not know how I was supposed to move it.

I asked a staff member at Eden no Sono for help, and they connected me with the physical therapist who works in the care building.

But all I received was a single sheet showing stick exercises, perhaps with diagrams or photographs.

I met the physical therapist once and talked with them, and after that, it was basically, “Please do it yourself.”

Of course, I understand that I have to make an effort myself because it is my own body.

But I had just had surgery for a fracture, and I was still in pain.

It was frightening to exercise on my own while wondering, “Am I really doing this correctly?”

So I went to the orthopedic department at Bethel Hospital.

There were many people there receiving rehabilitation for back and knee problems.

However, I was told that proximal humerus fractures were relatively uncommon, and there were very few people who specialized in treating them.

Then I was told that Dr. A at Dogo Onsen Hospital specializes in this area, and that a physical therapist working under Dr. A would probably be able to help me. They wrote me a referral letter.

It took quite a lot of time and effort just to get there.

Finally, I was able to see Dr. A at Dogo Onsen Hospital.

Dr. A asked me whether I would like to come for rehabilitation about three times a week.

I said yes, because that was what I intended to do.

But almost as soon as the examination room door closed, a male medical staff member who was there said,

“Three times a week is not possible. Twice a week is not possible either. Outpatient rehabilitation is once a week.”

I could not accept that.

But I did not have the energy to argue at that moment.

In the end, I began receiving outpatient rehabilitation about once a week.

I went about three times.

I think it was the second session when I experienced quite a lot of pain that night after rehabilitation.

However, the next day, I felt that my range of motion had improved slightly.

So I went back to Bethel Hospital and talked to the doctor again.

I was told, “Why don’t you honestly ask Dr. A whether inpatient rehabilitation is possible?”

If I were admitted to the hospital, there might be an opportunity to receive rehabilitation more frequently than as an outpatient.

However, that would only be possible if the doctor agreed that I could be admitted for rehabilitation.

That one decision made me very nervous.

It is my arm, but I cannot make the decision by myself.

Would the doctor say yes?

Yesterday, I kept thinking about that as I talked about the situation as much as I could.

And finally, I reached the point where I could receive an explanation about inpatient rehabilitation.

Two people explained the process to me and taught me how to fill out the necessary paperwork.

Now I am waiting for a room to become available.

I have finally come this far.

Even that alone has made me quite tired.

On top of all that, yesterday I also had an appointment with my psychiatrist at Bethel and had blood tests.

For the past two years, my health checkup records have shown that my kidneys and thyroid need some attention.

Because I have been taking lithium for a long time, I learned while studying medicines that lithium can affect the kidneys and thyroid.

So I discussed this with my doctor, and we decided that I would have blood tests.

Dr. A’s outpatient clinic is only on Wednesdays, and registration ends at 11:30 a.m.

So I had my psychiatric appointment at Bethel moved to first thing in the morning. I had to take the 9:45 a.m. Eden bus, because the next bus would not have gotten me there in time.

It became a race against the clock.

I told my psychiatrist what had been happening with my rehabilitation.

The doctor told me, in essence,

“Because of circumstances related to reducing medical costs and the healthcare system, there are cases where the number of rehabilitation sessions provided by physical therapists has been reduced. There are also things that doctors themselves may not know about.”

I replied, “I see.”

But inside, I was thinking,

“Isn’t that wrong?”

The fact that there may be circumstances within the healthcare system and the question of how sufficiently those circumstances are explained to patients are two different issues, aren’t they?

Doctors, nurses, and physical therapists all have different roles.

They also have different areas of expertise.

But from the patient’s point of view, aren’t they all part of one medical team?

A doctor says three times a week, and immediately afterward another medical professional says, “Once a week.”

As a patient, whose words am I supposed to trust?

Even if the number of rehabilitation sessions is restricted because of the healthcare system, I think how that situation is explained to the patient is a separate issue.

That is how I felt.

But yesterday, I no longer had the energy to argue about it.

I simply said, “I see,” and left it at that.

I also had to go to Matsuyama City Hall, and when I asked about this situation, I was told that neither City Hall nor the public health center had a department where I could consult about problems like this in the medical system.

That was also a little shocking.

Then I wondered, where is a patient supposed to go when they are having trouble within the medical system?

Of course, I do not expect the government to solve every problem.

Hospitals have their own circumstances.

Doctors have their own circumstances.

Physical therapists have their own circumstances.

Nurses have their own circumstances.

But the patient caught in between may have to understand all of these circumstances one by one while still being in pain, and find their own way through the system.

That is exactly what happened to me.

So I do not want to criticize the Japanese Red Cross hospital.

I am grateful that they performed the surgery for me.

But not every patient can simply say, “Once the surgery is done and the bone heals, everything is over.”

In my case, rehabilitation afterward was extremely important.

I never imagined that it would be so difficult just to reach the rehabilitation I needed.

And now, at last, I can see the possibility of inpatient rehabilitation.

I am waiting for a room to become available.

I have come this far, so I think it is okay for me to rest for a while now.

And yesterday, on my way home, I saw that prince in front of Dogo Prince Hotel.

Was he called the Egg Prince?

As always, I simply could not find him cute.

If anything, I found myself wondering why they had put that particular doll there.

But yesterday, when I saw that completely un-cute prince, I thought,

“Maybe you actually did comfort me a little by being there.”

That was probably how I was feeling yesterday.

Everything seemed difficult. I was tired of the medical system, tired from dealing with my own body, and yet I had somehow made it through another day and come home.

And there he was, that completely un-cute prince, standing there without knowing anything about what had happened to me.

Somehow, that alone made me smile.

Today, I am not going to push myself anymore.

I do not have to read the newspaper.

I do not have to study.

If I can sleep, I will sleep.

I have already done enough just to get this far.

#Rehabilitation
#ProximalHumerusFracture
#RecoveryFromAFracture
#PatientsAndHealthcare
#MedicalCoordination
#PatientsPerspective
#InpatientRehabilitation
#SeniorLife
#DailyReflections