memo

duudes.. i got a new journal

http://www.livejournal.com/users/__newbeginnings

<3amy

well i met unu up at starbucks for a good hour of tutoring and it was pretty fun just cause i really needed the help and unu is too funny. i had a good time weird enough as it is.. i got me some coffee and cheese cake<3
i know now that there is so much better a chance of me passing math after making up my corrections for that test.. i got a freaking 22 on it :( and the quiz before it i straight up got a BIG FAT ZERO! yeya no good but anyways we have pictures tomorrow i could really care less but yeah i needa get some laundry done. i go to the doc tomorrow pray that god miraculously heals my cracked little pinky bone :/ I MISS VOLLEYBALL and i miss holding my own hand when i am trying to keep warm at night.. :) i kinda feel like today is a big day.. nothing important happened but its the simplicities in life that make me smile.when nothings breaking you apart what can bring you down? man i am blessed. i think i have been really critical of myself and others around me when its not about my standards its all god's way and not mine and it doesnt matter how i see myself cause i need to step down and find that place where i can know me through god's eyes and see myself the way he looks at me.. living in the world and living in sin are about the same thing and if my standards arent held up to god and all of my life isnt surrendered to the cross and lord of all that died for my sins and imperfections than who am i to be critical of anything/one and even of myself.. are we not all sinners? was jesus not crucified for you and me? are we not beautiful to god and flawless beyond all imagine because the blood of jesus christ covers our sins?..
makes me think of this song

"what a shame that we would drown ourselves and waste your grace refusing the breath that you gave. forgive your weary son. i've cut your hands and still they carry me. i'm so sorry. liars. labanon. in days we forget why it hurts. what a shame that i would drown myself when so much love divides this in time to break the weighted of the earth. i am your weary son. i am the lowest of thy children. why do you take my hand without the smallest hate. love."


jesus i thank you for the peace you have given me and the love/grace you have placed in my heart towards others <3 godbless you all

well ladies and gents highschool is going well i got out of my incredibly hard english class but in that i also had to switch biology teachers and i really liked my old teacher but its all good my new one is just as pimp.. i almost feel like me and jamey arent as close anymore and its really like i feel guilty or something, i had been sitting with jess and josh and now with jamey and some other kids i dont know or care to know.. but i guess they're all good kids, just brainy/band kids.. yeeeeeya but anyways i met a really cool guy today he is in my biology class.. the only reason i really think he is cool cause guys allways hit on me in the hall and they are like "hey your cute can i get your number" and i am like "SICK FREAK I'LL KILL YOU" but he was just kinda like "whats your name.. etc" that kinda thing so i dunno.. seems like a cool kid. i dont think jessica likes me anymore i dont know why it just doesnt seem like she wants to be around me it really makes me feel bad.. i know i havent done anything to wrong her :( i hate it when i feel like my friends arent my friends. today i had detention and it wasnt bad at all actually i got a whole bunch of homework done in an hour and the detention lady was really nice.. i think i might get detention more often now.. it was just a good quiet peaceful time.. but if i get too many detentions i get ISS and if i get ISS i get kicked off the volleyball team which is no good at all! i am so excited about my new english class i absolutely love it.. we do all kinds of cool journaling and writing assignments and today i got my book to read shakespeares "the poems" its really long and i have to read it in 3 weeks but i am really interested in shakespeare/poetry so i thought it would be perfect.. wow i sound like a nerd but its all good. well friday i go into see the doc and i am pretty sure i am not gunna be released back to play volleyball.. well i know for sure i dont have my finger back yet. ehh its all good though i have had a lot of time to relax and since i stil do conditioning and running with the team i guess i'm keeping in shape too.. man god is good to me, so far everything has worked out perfectly even when things looked hopeless.. and it goes on to show everything happens for a reason .. that just makes my faith even stronger and man when the puzzle starts coming together boy oh boy i cant even describe it.. i had a really cool talk with my dad today about relationships and it was just cool that he knows how i feel about dating and guys and stuff.. we started talking about my friend and her boyfriend and how all they do is hug, but what makes that okay? and then me and my dad totally agreed that if your friends with a guy its alright to show him some affection cause he is your brother in christ but if your in a relationship it is physcial contact that tempts you to take things further.. and then i was just kinda like .. well i hug everyone i think its a good way to show gods love for them through you.. and my dad thought that was cool and it was exciting. well me and joe have gotten pretty tight i would say alot of my friends thinks he is interested in my in a way that i dont know i could deal with right now but honestly i think his intentions are in the right places and from what ben tells me he is a good guy, i am not gunna rule out my feelings for him but i definately dont want any kind of relationship right now and i know he respects me. so i have started carrying my bible all around school with me and i think it definately helps people to realize what kind of person i am, like today some guy was like "hey do you smoke, do cocaine, have sex" and i was like "DOES IT LOOK LIKE IT CRACK HEAD" and i held up my bible.. well i was a little bit nicer than calling him crackhead but ya know! right now i just really want to be a good influence on those around me especially my friends that i think really need me right now.. i mean we all go through rough times and i mean i can tell you when i need a friend or someone to hold me accountable.. i hate it when people have really low standards, what kind of character do you have when you cant trust yourself to make the right desicions? .. like i said i am blessed, my dearest friends who've held me up when i am weak i think you. <3 may god bless your souls and all of those around you.. I CANT WAIT FOR FCA :D:D:D
okay that was random but i am really excited
morelove-amy

so i just took the longest nap in the world.. no good cause tomorrow is gunna be exausting.. anyways my team had a volleyball tournament all weekend in which i couldnt play in but i was there the whole way with muh girls and they made me proud :) we got consolation but we won two outta three of the games we played on sat so it was pretty great. then saturday night me and ben met mary and jessica up at the sports court and had a good ole time playing a little bit of volleyball, which i couldnt do much of with a broken pinky anyways.. but yeah, its been interesting. i had a good time with mary and jess they are awesome and volleyball has been fun.. i cant wait to get my pinky back.. ::sigh:: well this morning there was church as allways on sunday morning paul is leaving on monday its so incredibly sad, i have known that kid for ever people grow up and go away so fast and being the young one that i am i guess i'll just hold my own here at home and miss em.. ben is graduating in a nother couple years too that is gunna be the ultimately saddest thing that i will go through i think and jess is a senior as is nicole.. yeah sadness. those are two of the greatest girls alive that have really been like mentors to me.. well anyways i have a lot of math homework to do and everyone is out at the lake but i couldnt go because of my math.. i need unu (my tutor) but he isnt on line . grr! but oh well maybe i'll be able to get this done on my own.. well prolly not i am not getting this math right now, algebra isnt my friend!!! well i am starving even though i had some pokey joe's for lunch i think its time to eat some more.. its like they say "amy dang, your allways hungry".. yeah it happens .. well peace/love god is good<3 blessing be to yah people

well i cracked this bone in my pinky and i'll be out for ten days and the i go back to the doc and he said whether or not i can be released.. i really miss volleyball already not playing is kind of depressing but its all good.. so today there was a CCC(connally community cougars) meeting and i was like thats cool community service and i can get hours in for the things i do through church and stuff but no.. there's a list of things you can sign up for and you dont get credit through anything outside of it.. but oh well .. it is gunna be pimpin anyways cause jess n mary and hannah and some other lovely's are gunna be in it with me yes yes.. so today i was at my locker talking to jess and getting books out and tj walks by and says something to jess and said hi to ben and then he realized i was there and was like .. i'm outta here and it was gay.. but oh well i hate it when he notices me cause i dont know what he's thinking and he wont say hi or anything its like we're strangers that used to be.. so much more.. i guess all the hurting is keeping me from moving on and that might be a good thing.. single time is good all to spend with god.. yes and god is good.. i feel awesome about me right now just because i havent strayed i just get a little depressed which i know isnt god.. but it happens right? well its only ten days outta practice which is better than i thought and i much look forward to recovery.. god is good to me the bone is cracked but my joints and everything is still in alignment so yeah.. it could be lots worse THAAANK YOUU JESUS! mmm.. school is boring but i have had some fun hanging with jess and josh at lunch )lol( josh is halarious and i see joe alot in the halls what a sweet kid he allways walks me to class :) god makes life worth living and gives you all the right oppourtunities where you need em.. thank jesus christ for the people in my life that make me feel special
<3 love

mmm.. tuesday while we were playing leander i injured my pinky finger which has to be the sissyest injurying in the world but i am pretty sure its broken i have to go in and get it x-rayed tomorrow..

if all of you would to me a big favor and just ask god to heal my fingers and give them strength that would be freaking pimp.. or just ask god to take the pain away cause as i type the feeling is quite unpleasent.
yes.. PRAY FOR ME!!!

and so life goes on.. unfortunately mine goes on without volleyball.. i dont know how long i'll be out but i have a passionate love for the sport and i like to think i am decent at it!

i will be there every practice to encourage my ladies.. i hope to still be part of the team for the rest of the season and get back on my feet.. my job is to make you better by pumping you up and i do beleive that. i just hope i am not disctracting during drills and mess.. but i think maybe i'm doing alright

well god is good to me.. with a broken finger i have a lot of time to sit and think.. there are so many things you would never even realize that you use your pinky for..

i think i took my little finger for granted and god has given me an apprectiation for all 2000 parts of my body

:)godbless

friday night was amazing
god was there and it was just me and the savior of my soul.. worship rocked the house and the preaching/speakers were incredible! there was such a great message shared about the power of god and how he uses our weaknesses to strengthen us.. it was so great.. i feel good.. grandma started praying over me and man the spirit was on me like no other and like it was crazy cause i speak in tounges all the time but i just feel like i am rambling on without reason but man i know that it was meaning a lot even though i didnt know what i was saying that there's no other way it had to of been jesus inside of me it was too amazing for words i cant even describe how great the love of jesus christ is. i was really touched by everything shared that night.. the pastors son was preaching and man some of the things he said hit like a bullet to the heart it was all about surrendering your life to god and dying daily for god so that he can come live in us that way we can be a living sacrifise for god.. but if we dont die first for god than we are only living for ourselves/only living in sin.. sin=death.. THERE'S NO LIVING WITHOUT JESUS CHRIST! man there's so much i could share about it would take hours but unforunately i have to read 2 novels, answers 120 reading questions, write a book review, relate story lines to different topics, do a charater sociogram, write something about how the book relates with my life.. and well the list goes on for homework i have due in a few days. i'm out kiddos
GODBLESS!

well friday morning was ruff yeah i was all in tears at practice thanks for your support ladies i couldnt be more greatful for my teamates.

so today was my 2nd day at connally highschool
i am really excited cause chris told me that he is on of the leaders in fca at chs and he has been talking to the president about me quite a bit.. he also said that they are gunna be starting a cell group and i am really really really really pumped.. god is good to me, he opens all the doors.. this year is gunna be rocking i can already feel the spirit moving in my life in ways i never thought possible and i know once things get started the love of jesus christ will be the most incredible thing that has ever hit connally high school. i cant say that i've been looking forward to starting this year all that much but god takes care of me like no other and i have made some good friends and hopefully some good impressions.. JESUS LOVES YOU.. godbless!

well! saturday me and peri and jamey went out to the movies.. i ended up having a good time with peri and her cousin was there.. they are awesome.. so like we get there and i was like hey jamey allie is here and then jamey was all like ooh ohh allie and allie is cool so we go and talk to her for a while and jamey trades our tickets in so we can see the same movie and it was freaking alien vs perdator and me and peri didnt want to see that but i was trying to be considerate of jamey cause i know she would like to spend sometime with her friends.. so we get in there and sit down and jamey gets up and goes with allie and sits on the opposite side of the theatre and me and peri are like what the heck we didnt even want to see this movie so we leave and me and peri were really upset with jamey and we get our money back and buy a ticket for the 9:40 showing of princess diaries two and like thats the movie we wanted to see in the first place and we got up to the theatre at freaking 6:45 so we had to wait a long while before the movie started cause jamey wasnt thinking straight and then jamey's freind leaves after their movie was over and then she wants to talk to us after her little cheer freinds leave.. and peri is like straight up no.. dont talk to us now after they leave thats not right you cant be doing us like they we are your friends.. and i was like yeeeyaaa peri is a baller .. jamey is like my best friend and she cant just ditch us like that, i dont know if she realized it or not but thats a really crappy thing to do and any loyal friend.. straight up wouldnt do that.. i really love jamey alot but that wasnt cool.. so sunday i have to get up for church after being out late at the movies and staying up watching the olympics with my family.. and i was very very tired.. and then we went to fudruckers with the longoria's and paul and baker and george and i cant really think of who else but its all good.. so i went home watched some volleyball on tv and then ate jack in the box with daddy.. i have practice tomorrow and i really need a ride but i'l prolly be able to find one. i really love the girls on my volleyball team jessica, mary, shelby, kk, hannah.. well all of them oohh and bria she is so sweet i know i will enjoy this season alot.. these ladies rock! i am very excited.. i dont know if i want to start school or not but i think there will be a lot of oppourtunities to share my faith with non beleivers.. and there will be alot of people that i dont know from west veiw and older peoples! its gunna be good no matter what.. i trust the lord to keep me set apart and not let me fall..


"nothing compares to the promise i have in you"

i love jesus.. YEYA <3amy