I lay crying on the dank motel bed. I was in Spokane, Washington with one of my best friends. It seemed like we were millions of miles from home. The boy I had only met a few months ago, who had asked me to drive up to Washington from Salt Lake and had convinced me that we were perfect for each other, had disappeared off the face of the planet. I was mad, embarrassed, and depressed. He had convinced me to do something that was completely unlike me, and I was more upset with myself than I was with anyone else. Robyn tried to console me like a good friend would do. She sat on the bed next to me and let me cry.
With my legs pulled toward my chest, I tried to control my emotions and analyze the situation I had gotten myself into. We had a car, some money for food and gas, and a map of the US. I knew there were people I could call, people who would do anything to help me, but I didn’t want them to know how stupid I had been, how badly I had misjudged the situation. I had never been this spontaneous, and now it had all backfired.
I had to figure this out. Even with Robyn there, I had never felt so alone in my life. I was in a strange place, and an even stranger situation. The smell of cigarette smoke and cheap motel mingled in the air around me, and I knew I would have to make the best of this dreadful situation.
Tuesday, October 14, 2008
personal narrative -2a-
To understand how this situation had come about, we need to back up about 4 months. My Air Force ROTC detachment was at Fairchild Air Force Base in Spokane, Washington. We were spending a few days touring the base, and learning what it was like to be on active duty. One day while getting food in the chow hall, I was approached by a young airman in his uniform. He asked me if I was from Utah, and after noticing my confused look, he mentioned that he had seen my CTR ring and figured that since I was Mormon, I must be from Utah. I was hesitant to give him any information about myself; until I found out we went to the same high school and graduated a year apart. He introduced himself as Josh, and to make it even stranger, he was friends with my best friend Brandon. After talking for a few minutes, I said goodbye and didn’t think more about him until a week later when Brandon gave him my e-mail address.
Over the next three months Josh and I started calling and texting each other daily. Although I had only really met him once, I felt that I knew him pretty well. After all, I had asked Brandon about him and even went as far as to ask a seminary teacher we both had if this boy was for real. It wasn’t until later that I realized how naïve and stupid I had been.
One day in late April, Robyn and I had gone out to lunch at one of my favorite restaurants. We were both stressed from school and ready to take a break. When the idea of a road trip came up, I was quick to mention that maybe we could go back to Fairchild AFB. Robyn definitely had fun the first time we went there, and we could take a trip over to Mt. St. Helens, and come back through Yellowstone. It was settled. We mapped out our route and anxiously awaited our departure.
Two days before we left, I called Josh to make sure that the motels on base were available. Without missing a beat he told me that they were always available, and they never filled up. That was great news for us, because the motel on base only cost about $25 a night.
After finishing up some last minute grocery shopping and tests, we were off! I could hardly contain my excitement. I was finally doing something completely spontaneous and random. Even if I didn’t end up liking this guy, I was going to have a great time and I really deserved this vacation.
Over the next three months Josh and I started calling and texting each other daily. Although I had only really met him once, I felt that I knew him pretty well. After all, I had asked Brandon about him and even went as far as to ask a seminary teacher we both had if this boy was for real. It wasn’t until later that I realized how naïve and stupid I had been.
One day in late April, Robyn and I had gone out to lunch at one of my favorite restaurants. We were both stressed from school and ready to take a break. When the idea of a road trip came up, I was quick to mention that maybe we could go back to Fairchild AFB. Robyn definitely had fun the first time we went there, and we could take a trip over to Mt. St. Helens, and come back through Yellowstone. It was settled. We mapped out our route and anxiously awaited our departure.
Two days before we left, I called Josh to make sure that the motels on base were available. Without missing a beat he told me that they were always available, and they never filled up. That was great news for us, because the motel on base only cost about $25 a night.
After finishing up some last minute grocery shopping and tests, we were off! I could hardly contain my excitement. I was finally doing something completely spontaneous and random. Even if I didn’t end up liking this guy, I was going to have a great time and I really deserved this vacation.
personal narrative -2b-
Looking back, the actual driving part of the road trip was the best part. Trying to make tuna fish sandwiches while going 100 mph probably isn’t the safest thing, but we managed. Robyn’s car got great gas mileage, but there was one instance where she noticed that there was enough gas to get us ten miles (down hill, with the wind pushing us) and we were smack dab in the middle of nowhere. All of a sudden we spotted a tiny town to the left, and we pulled off the freeway. Half an hour later we were standing in a bar trying to figure out how to get the gas out of this antique pump, the kind you only see in movies. Robyn wasn’t too happy with the selection of gas (her car took premium). We also noticed something wrong with the tires while we were stopped, but didn’t think anything of it. We were on our way again!
As we neared the Washington/Idaho border, I began to get nervous. Josh was going to meet us outside of the gates to give us access to the base, and take us to our lodgings. As I kept looking in the mirror and fixing my makeup and hair, Robyn just laughed. Josh was bringing a friend for her, but she was just excited to be going back to an air force base. Admittedly, we both have a weakness for men in uniform.
The time finally arrived. We pulled into the small parking lot outside of the base and waited. After waiting a little bit longer than I would have liked, I got a phone call from Josh saying that they were almost there. All of a sudden I saw a truck rounding the corner with two guys in it. I didn’t feel bad about it now, but my first thought was “he’s not as attractive as I remember.” Regardless of his appearance, I was thrilled. He introduced us to his friend (Paul) and we drove onto the base. That was when the trouble started.
When we went to get a room in the base motel, we were told that they were all unavailable. I was more annoyed than mad, and we ended up driving away from the base looking for a motel. I don’t know how, but we managed to find the scariest motel in the state. I wanted to nick-name it the “bates motel.” You could just picture the young man in Alfred Hitchcock’s Psycho standing behind the main window. As soon as the fog rolled in and the prostitutes came out, my worst fears about the hotel were confirmed. But through all of this I was still optimistic because I was going to have the time of my life!
As we neared the Washington/Idaho border, I began to get nervous. Josh was going to meet us outside of the gates to give us access to the base, and take us to our lodgings. As I kept looking in the mirror and fixing my makeup and hair, Robyn just laughed. Josh was bringing a friend for her, but she was just excited to be going back to an air force base. Admittedly, we both have a weakness for men in uniform.
The time finally arrived. We pulled into the small parking lot outside of the base and waited. After waiting a little bit longer than I would have liked, I got a phone call from Josh saying that they were almost there. All of a sudden I saw a truck rounding the corner with two guys in it. I didn’t feel bad about it now, but my first thought was “he’s not as attractive as I remember.” Regardless of his appearance, I was thrilled. He introduced us to his friend (Paul) and we drove onto the base. That was when the trouble started.
When we went to get a room in the base motel, we were told that they were all unavailable. I was more annoyed than mad, and we ended up driving away from the base looking for a motel. I don’t know how, but we managed to find the scariest motel in the state. I wanted to nick-name it the “bates motel.” You could just picture the young man in Alfred Hitchcock’s Psycho standing behind the main window. As soon as the fog rolled in and the prostitutes came out, my worst fears about the hotel were confirmed. But through all of this I was still optimistic because I was going to have the time of my life!
Personal narrative -3-
We made plans for the boys to pick us up the next morning. Josh promised me we were going to have an amazing day. The next morning I woke up and eagerly got ready. The time came for Paul and Josh to pick us up, but three hours later I was still stuck sitting on the edge of my bed with a grin on my face waiting for his arrival. I should have taken this as a sign of the bad things to come. Finally, around noon, the boys showed up at our motel. After a brief explanation of why they were late (something about video games), we all walked out to Robyn’s car. Unfortunately, we had not realized that our small tire problem from the day before had quickly spiraled out of control. We couldn’t drive another mile on those tires. Instead of heading out to have a good time together, we ended up spending 2 hours at the nearest tire store getting new tires put on her car.
Instead of the wonderful day I was promised, we spent 3 hours at the Spokane Mall. If anyone knows me well, they know I hate malls, and I hate shopping. This was when I started to notice something was wrong. Not only did Josh not talk to me, but he avoided eye contact completely. This was starting to bother me. I had driven all the way out here, and I wanted a good time! Well it didn’t happen. Out of nowhere Josh told me that he had a class that night and that he would call me when he finished. My happy bubble had been burst, and I soon realized how naïve I had been. I watched him walk away, knowing that I had been lied to. I knew he wasn’t going to call, but I desperately clung to that irrational bit of hope that I was wrong.
Fortunately, Robyn helped me make the best of an already terrible evening. We ended up going to a small restaurant across from our hotel. We didn’t have much money because we ended up spending more on lodging than we had planned on, but we still wanted to make this night special. I remember getting the chicken friend steak; Robyn tried to convince me that I needed a daiquiri. I don’t drink, and I had to convince both the waitress and Robyn that no matter how sad I was, I didn’t need an alcoholic drink. Thinking that I might like a different kind of drink, the waitress helpfully offered me a margarita instead. I asked “What’s the difference between a daiquiri and a Margarita?” The waitress, looking a little confused, replied “um.... Rum and Tequila?” “Oh, is that it?” I wondered “It's virgin anyways... so I don't care. Bring me whatever is biggest.” Of course Robyn wanted to help me, so she suggested “She's Mormon, but she's depressed, make it a daiquiri and slip in some Rum.”
Instead of the wonderful day I was promised, we spent 3 hours at the Spokane Mall. If anyone knows me well, they know I hate malls, and I hate shopping. This was when I started to notice something was wrong. Not only did Josh not talk to me, but he avoided eye contact completely. This was starting to bother me. I had driven all the way out here, and I wanted a good time! Well it didn’t happen. Out of nowhere Josh told me that he had a class that night and that he would call me when he finished. My happy bubble had been burst, and I soon realized how naïve I had been. I watched him walk away, knowing that I had been lied to. I knew he wasn’t going to call, but I desperately clung to that irrational bit of hope that I was wrong.
Fortunately, Robyn helped me make the best of an already terrible evening. We ended up going to a small restaurant across from our hotel. We didn’t have much money because we ended up spending more on lodging than we had planned on, but we still wanted to make this night special. I remember getting the chicken friend steak; Robyn tried to convince me that I needed a daiquiri. I don’t drink, and I had to convince both the waitress and Robyn that no matter how sad I was, I didn’t need an alcoholic drink. Thinking that I might like a different kind of drink, the waitress helpfully offered me a margarita instead. I asked “What’s the difference between a daiquiri and a Margarita?” The waitress, looking a little confused, replied “um.... Rum and Tequila?” “Oh, is that it?” I wondered “It's virgin anyways... so I don't care. Bring me whatever is biggest.” Of course Robyn wanted to help me, so she suggested “She's Mormon, but she's depressed, make it a daiquiri and slip in some Rum.”
Personal narrative -4-
I never got a call that night, and that’s what brought me down to my lowest moment. While lying on my bed, with tears running down my face, I apologized to Robyn for bringing her out there. I felt like the worst friend in the world. How could I have been so stupid? She furiously tried to call Josh, she even left some interesting messages in his voice mailbox. Even though I felt horrible and betrayed, I was grateful for such an amazing friend. I’m so glad Robyn came with me; I don’t know what I would have done with out her.
The next morning we came decided that we should go home. We had spent all of our money on the hotel, and now we had no reason for staying there. After one last call to Josh, we left. I didn’t know what I would say if he answered his phone, but I was still clinging to the hope that a mistake had been made and he didn’t mean any of it.
As we left Spokane, neither of use spoke much. Robyn knew how hurt I was, and I felt that if I opened my mouth I might be sick. We both knew that we couldn’t let a boy ruin our trip, so when we reached Coeur D’Alene, Idaho we put on our swimming suits and headed to the lake. We though we could finish the trip off right by trying out luck at kayaking. I’m still shocked that we didn’t tip over. We pulled into my drive-way 14 hours later. How would I explain to my family why we had come home four days earlier than planned? I walked in the house, and started to unpack. My mom must have heard me, because she came up to my room. I kept my bearing, didn’t cry, and simply told her that things didn’t work out like we had planned. Of course she knew something was wrong, but I was safe, and that was all she cared about.
Fortunately, life went back to normal, and I avoided telling people about my “trip” to Washington. I still felt stupid and it took me awhile to forgive him, but I learned a lot about myself from this trip. I learned who my true friends were, and I realized that I can go on with my life even in the most unexpected circumstances.
The next morning we came decided that we should go home. We had spent all of our money on the hotel, and now we had no reason for staying there. After one last call to Josh, we left. I didn’t know what I would say if he answered his phone, but I was still clinging to the hope that a mistake had been made and he didn’t mean any of it.
As we left Spokane, neither of use spoke much. Robyn knew how hurt I was, and I felt that if I opened my mouth I might be sick. We both knew that we couldn’t let a boy ruin our trip, so when we reached Coeur D’Alene, Idaho we put on our swimming suits and headed to the lake. We though we could finish the trip off right by trying out luck at kayaking. I’m still shocked that we didn’t tip over. We pulled into my drive-way 14 hours later. How would I explain to my family why we had come home four days earlier than planned? I walked in the house, and started to unpack. My mom must have heard me, because she came up to my room. I kept my bearing, didn’t cry, and simply told her that things didn’t work out like we had planned. Of course she knew something was wrong, but I was safe, and that was all she cared about.
Fortunately, life went back to normal, and I avoided telling people about my “trip” to Washington. I still felt stupid and it took me awhile to forgive him, but I learned a lot about myself from this trip. I learned who my true friends were, and I realized that I can go on with my life even in the most unexpected circumstances.
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