Make a Smilebox photobook

Atticus's Blessing, September 20th

Atticus is here!

The primary reason we haven't updated our blog in so many months happens to be the most wonderful event of our married lives--the birth of our first child, Atticus Walker Frahm, born Sunday, August 30, 2009, at 6:12 pm. Here is the announcement Walker composed, and some pictures of, no exaggeration, the cutest little boy in the universe. :) At least, in our universe.
---
I have to say, I miss my old home. At my last place, I had 24 hour climate control, food on demand, and nobody ever tried to cut, swab, or probe any part of me. I will admit, however, that it was definitely time to move on. Towards the end there, it was getting kind of rough.

It was just this last Saturday morning, around 3:00 AM, that I woke up to find the walls surrounding me literally shaking as they were wracked with periodic and increasingly intense tremors. I tried everything I could to stay inside of my cozy little habitation – cramped though it was – but after nearly 40 hours of being squeezed and compressed, I was actually kind of glad to find myself in a big new place called the Outside World. More specifically, I think I heard people referring to it as Yale – New Haven Hospital.

As I recall, the clock said 6:12 on Sunday evening when I got my first glimpse of this Outside World place. Although it is not nearly as warm out here, and it is a lot more work to keep my little belly full than it used to be, this new place definitely does have some advantages.

For instance, in the Outside World, everybody gives me credit for things that are completely beyond my control. Like, for weighing 7 lbs 2 ounces, for being 20 inches long, and even just for having a bunch of red hairs on my head. I’m not quite sure why people care so much about this stuff, but it is kind of cool how I get treated like a celebrity everywhere I go just for doing my thing and looking cute.

Also, in the Outside World I have these two personal caretakers named Mommy and Daddy who are so wholly, unconditionally, and absolutely in love with me, that I can get them to do just about anything to keep me happy. They have even given me a full name – Atticus Walker Frahm – which is a lot better than just being called a baby all the time. The strange part about this whole thing is that even though it doesn’t seem like Mommy and Daddy sleep or eat very much since I arrived, they can’t stop saying how happy they are. Go figure!

---

Long, sunny July days

I must first apologize to my good friend, Kim, in CA. The following update was first sent to her, but upon reading it, I determined it would serve equally well to update everyone else, with a little editing. So, sorry for the repeat, Kim, and hope everyone else can follow.

Walker is out of the country researching the philsophies and programs of counter-trafficking organizations in Chisinau, Moldova. Most are focused on preventing trafficking of women into the sex industry. He spends most of his time interviewing people at NGOs, GOs, and IGOs--some are devoted solely to anti-trafficking, others have a broader scope but pay some attention to trafficking. He also wrote two surveys with the help of a couple professors, and got funding to pay a survey group in Moldova to conduct the surveys so that he has 1,000 responses each for statistical purposes (you'll have to ask him for clarifications, since he understands this much better than me). I think his senior essay is going to be quite interesting! We are lucky enough to be able to talk over Skype many times a week, so I really feel connected to him and his work. I just talked to him this afternoon, and he is doing very well. He continues to work really hard and has scheduled many interviews for the coming weeks. It will be fun to see what interesting things he will discover, and it will also be even more fun to see him in a few weeks!

As for me, my last day of work is in 2 weeks! I was home in Utah from May 24-June 16, and now I am back for the rest of the summer. I'm not planning on going back to work at the medical school after the baby's born, since the project I was hired for is nearly done (well, okay, not really, but at least the phase that I was needed for is nearing completion), and I had agreed with my boss that I'd be leaving around this time anyway. Also, though, I'm not planning on working in an office setting once the baby's born. The first few years of my child's life are just too precious to me. Though it will likely be more challenging financially and, at times, personally, for me, the benefits outweigh the drawbacks. I will likely pick up some tutoring and piano teaching work if and when life returns to "normal," whenever and whatever that is. And, no matter what ends up happening, I've decided it is really important to make sure I still have some time to pursue my own interests and continue developing my skills and abilities. Whether or not this takes the form of working from home or going back to work once kids are in school, or going back to school myself, or none of the above, I really don't know.

I went to the first week of a five-week birthing class I'm signed up for on Wednesday night. My friend, Alexis, came with, since Walker is away. I didn't learn too much I haven't already learned from my reading, but we did practice some stretches and exercises that I hadn't done before, and that was instructive. It was actually very helpful to hear my own learning and thinking validated. Since I would really like to have a natural childbirth, and this class focuses on natural childbirth, I really appreciated hearing the teacher say things like "Every woman has the innate wisdom to give birth." I believe this is essentially the Lamaze philosophy of birthing. I know there are as many women as there are birthing styles and philosophies, but I feel, after many books and conversations, that I have finally defined mine. It doesn't have a name, and it doesn't really fall under any one particular school of thought, but I know what it is, and I guess that's what counts.

In other news--wait a minute, this is still about pregnancy and babies!--I am growing a lot. It's crazy how much my body can stretch to accommodate little Kiwi. And the crazy part is that he will probably almost double in weight between now and his birth (due date Sep. 2). The irony is that, while I'm supposed to get 400-500 extra calories per day at this point, my stomach is also much smaller, so I'm constantly eating!

Okay, really, in other news, Walker will return on July 31, and we will be moving August 15 to Whitehall, the family graduate student housing complex by the Divinity School. I hope Kiwi does not decide to be born that day. :) I will be sad to leave the house we've been housesitting in North Haven, but also happy to have our own place, where there is actually room for our things. Here, the shelves and drawers and cupboards are packed with their stuff (by the way, the home belongs to Prof. John Merriman and his family). It will be nice to feel I have "my own" space again.

What else? Let's see, I have been teaching myself to play the guitar and having some success. In church, I, along with another woman, am in charge of playing with and teaching ten 2-3 year olds. That keeps me on my toes! This weekend, I'm taking a trip with Alexis and Jeff to go see the Hill Cumorah Pageant, a big production done by church members in Palmyra, NY; after the pageant, we'll go see Niagara Falls. I've been to the Falls once before, but it should still be fun! Oh yes, and I learned how to make artisan bread the other day. And, I got the recipes for two soups from Claire's--a split pea soup and a curry lentil soup--which I made last week. They were quite tasty. And yesterday, I went on a hike with my friend, Dawn, which challenged my stretching ligaments and somewhat less stable muscles. It was a beautiful day, perfect temperature, and I really felt invigorated afterwards. Just a few random little things that add meaning and interest to my life right now.

I hope that Walker will be almost home next time I write. Then, I will have some more interesting things to relate. Until then!

Away Frahm New Haven and each other

During the wee hours of Tuesday morning, Walker and I were driven to JFK by a very generous church friend. The weekend had been a whirlwind, bringing us to good places and things, but at a breakneck pace. It was Thursday night when we decided to spend some time on Friday and Saturday in the outdoors in celebration of our anniversary on Sunday, May 24. We had also tried to get to the Manhattan Temple earlier in the week, but traffic was so bad we were forced to turn around, but still, we wanted to take some time to be together and serve in the temple. So, on Friday morning before I went to work, I threw together some clothes and toiletries and Walker rushed me to work. Then, he gathered all of the other necessities for our trip and packed them, a loving gesture which started our weekend off on the right foot. Around noon, he whisked in and picked me up from work and we took off to New York. The drive in was very pleasant, and we took time to reminisce about our wedding day, and to daydream and ruminate a little over our future. Our experience in the temple was refreshing and much-needed, which proved fortuitous. In our careful, detailed, in-advance planning, we had neglected to attend to the important fact that we would be leaving Manhattan at 4:45 on the Friday of Memorial Day weekend. Enough said.

That evening around 9:00, we arrived at Macedonia Brook State Park. Though we had wanted to hike Mt. Riga, the highest point in Connecticut, Walker had sprained his ankle, and, though my enthusiasm for hiking to peaks is nearly unsquelchable, I wasn't sure that a 6-month pregnant woman should put her baby or body through that. So, we decided to take it a bit easy. We went to Macedonia Brook last summer, and it was just as beautiful this time around. We watched the stars through our mesh-top tent and fell asleep, exhausted but very satisfied with our day. I woke up in the darkness to a few light drops of rain. After Walker hastily replaced the rain fly, we settled back down and enjoyed one of the most pleasant sensations of camping - being warm and dry inside a little space while listening to the rain trickle and patter and tap against the tent.

That was the last real moment of peace and quiet we had that weekend. Saturday, we took a moderate hike leading to some nice overlooks and then headed home, arriving in the late afternoon in time to do some trip preparation. On Sunday, our actual anniversary, we made stuffed peppers together and then enjoyed the year-old top layer of our wedding cake, chocolate chip with cream cheese filling. All of it was plain delicious. Then, we spent some evening hours diassembling our bed, wardrobe, hooks, racks, etc. from our old apartment, which we needed to vacate on Monday...on Monday, a good handful of church men showed up and helped us move all of our things within the space of 90 minutes. Wow. :) This was true service--giving up a few precious morning hours on a rare Monday holiday to help us move. I packed up kitchen stuff and Walker and I cleaned the apartment. We were done by 3:00 pm--no small feat, we felt.
And then the 9-hour (for Jenn) and 13-hour (for Walker) marathon of packing, cleaning, gathering, emailing, transferring of material, and confirming of plans began. Promptly at 4:00 am, Brady Pope, our ride, knocked on the door. My flight left at 7:00 am, arriving inexplicably but mercifully nearly an hour early. Walker, unfortunately, had to wait in the airport until 5:30 pm for his flight to leave. Walker is in many ways my hero, and this is only one small way in which I idolize him. Walker has so much patience and tolerance for spending long periods of time in rather dreary and mundane locations, but still finding something fun or productive to do. He arrived safely in Bucarest, where he plans to stay until Tuesday-ish when he leaves for Chisinau, Moldova.

In the meantime, I have gone on a trip to Goblin Valley in southern Utah with my family this week, and tomorrow Spencer (19-year old brother) will address our congregation in anticipation of his departure to serve a mission for our church in Oslo, Norway. Believe me, I am excited about this. Especially since we will be able to understand each other with a little practice.
But, perhaps even more, because I know Spence will have the opportunity to learn and grow so much, and to experience the true joy of always serving others.

Kiwi clicks his heels and kicks joyfully, and I smile tiredly but happily, until next time.

It will be a boy! And, Jenn's birthday celebration and ruminations

In case you didn't hear, we are having a boy! We found out on Dad's birthday, April 8th. We are naturally very excited. By the way, just in case Becca and David get up the nerve to have another boy, we've already staked a claim on the names Rufus Brock Frahm and Gaylord Fauntleroy Frahm. Don't even try to steal those ones--they are permanently posted on the blog, now, so you have no excuse for temporary lapses of memory. In other news about Kiwi (as he will continue to be known in utero), today was the first day Walker was able to feel him kick. After lunch today, Kiwi must literally have been dancing. Maybe it was even The Electric (boogy-woogy-woogy...). Walker came in and coaxed Kiwi, but he needed no coaxing. It's nice to know someone else can feel him move, and that I'm actually growing a baby. :)

In other news, I celebrated an excellent 26th birthday. I received some very thoughtful cards and gifts, and many of my friends wished me a happy birthday. I felt so loved and remembered by others, which I need sometimes. I appreciate the great kindness of my family and friends. My day was pretty run-of-the-mill, which, since I almost always enjoy work, means it was actually a very good day. Walker picked me up from work at 5:00 and proceeded to drive South, instead of North. At this point, of course, I became suspicious. Were we going to a McDonald's 30 minutes away? Were we going to some place in upstate New York to try out the region's only Romanian restaurant? Was Walker's lack of cooperation with my investigative inquiries driving me crazy? Well, finally we exited in Darien, CT. Walker told me to look for a place to eat. There were some respectable places--a "luncheon diner," a little Indian place, and an apparently famous deli. Also, some disreputable locales-- a Dunkin' Donuts prime among them. After driving back over the same stretch of road a few times, Walker finally veered down another street. Though I immediately spotted the intended destination, I pretended innocence. Which, of course, Walker saw right through. :) Which created a lovely birthday moment in which I realized Walker knows my heart like no other, and loves me for whatever it is he sees in it. We walked into the "The Melting Pot: A Fondue Restaurant," which was tucked away at the end of a small side street and marked by trees adorned with white lights and by a little fountain (appropriately foreshadowing the flowing fondue to be tasted inside). The host took us to a very private booth with some fresh red roses already on it--he wished me a happy birthday, and I enjoyed the realization that Walker had planned all of this. The whole dinner was divine. First course: spinach-artichoke cheese fondue with bread, vegetables, and apples as dippers. Second course: salads (not Walk's favorite, but I'm proud of him for giving it a try); mine a California-style salad with walnuts, gorgonzola cheese, and raspberry dressing; his a spinach-mushroom-bacon creation. Third course: various small pieces of meat and vegetables to be skewered and boiled in the broth fondue. Walker immediately fell for the filet mignon. I admit, my first encounter with such an expensive meat was quite tasty, but I remained partial to the shrimp dipped in cocktail sauce and also enjoyed the vegetables dipped in the yogurt-curry sauce. As we were stewing over (hehe...) the third course options, I realized that my pregnant middle section doesn't hold as much food at once as it used to. But, I also realized that chocolate would be coming. So, I did the only thing a self-respecting pregnant woman would do: unzipped my skirt. Now, no need to panic. We were in a booth all by ourselves and I was very well covered. Walker indulged my ardent desire to order the Pure option: pure dark chocolate, unadulterated by nasty marshmallow fluff or bananas or swirls of caramel. Just the real stuff. And divine it was. On strawberries, poundcake, rice-crispy treats, and cheesecake. Dark, flowing, divine chocolate. The perfect ending. :) We spent about 3 hours there, which gave us plenty of time to relax and enjoy our special night.

While we were there, I spent a while reflecting to Walker on my 26th year, culminating in my 26th birthday. This year has witnessed many remarkable and profound changes in my life. It started with the completion of my MA, which marked the temporary end of my formal years of school-based education. Directly following that event, Walker and I were married for time and eternity, a change so profound that it alone would have qualified this year as the most transformative of the past 26. This year, however, also marked my first "real" jobs as a teacher at the University of New Haven and as an education coordinator at Yale's medical school. And, finally, the last quarter of my 26th year has been spent thinking about and adapting to another profound change: carrying and growing our tiny baby and preparing for motherhood. Reflecting on all of these changes, many of which have been miraculous, I cannot supress feelings of utmost gratitude to my Heavenly Father for making all of these transformations possible and for carefully and patiently taking care of my changing needs and feelings. I also cannot help but feel extreme gratitude to Walker for his care and complete devotion to me. I live a rich, abundant life, which I do not deserve, but for which I am powerfully thankful. I look forward with great hope to another incredible year!

Little Red is Back! (i.e. I Cut My Hair)

Jenn's new hair!

I finally worked up the courage to go get my hair cut. Here are some photos I took from Walker's Mac, just playing around a little.

I'm sending my hair to the same place Courtney did--Locks of Love. I love the lightness of my hair. And, I can actually run my fingers all the way through it without twisting my arm into a pretzel.

On a deeper level, even though it's a simple haircut, the change has done something to confirm in my soul that spring is finally arriving, new, fresh, and bright!