My life as Mommy

Time flies when you're a mommy!  It is absolutely unbelievable that my baby girl will be 8 months tomorrow!!!  Where in the world has time gone?  I am having so much fun watching Leah grow up.  I love babies so much and was worried that she wouldn't be as much fun as she started to get older.  Ha!  How wrong I was.  Each little thing that she does is such a thrill and her little personality is getting much more evident.  God is an awesome God for orchestrating family this way, isn't he?  He knew that a little baby would touch our hearts and that love would grow with each passing day.  I'm amazed.  Here is a little compilation of video clips of what she's been up to recently.  She still doesn't crawl, but she gets on all fours and does some pretty great yoga moves and planks. :)  She will get herself to paper one way or another if she sees it across the room.  My favorite is how she gets up on all fours and falls forward to get herself where she wants to be.  She still does all kinds of tricks and charms everyone with them.  She waves, gives high fives, puts her hands in the air for "so big", and still has a bad cough and the sniffles.  I still can't believe that she's mine... ours!

Welcome, Baby Leah!

I have been meaning to do this blog post since Leah was born, but my priorities have shifted a bit. J  However, I have already switched all of her clothes over to 0-3 months and she is starting to hold up her head already, so I realized I better get it done!  She’s already growing up too fast.  Here’s a little bit about what’s happened since March 20^th. 

At about 2:00 AM Wednesday (March 20^th) morning, I woke up having contractions.  This had been a normal occurrence ever since my fall, so I wasn’t too concerned about it… just a little bit annoyed.  I laid awake until about 4:00, when I decided that I should get up and walk around.  All of the other times that I had contractions, activity would make them stop.  So, for about two hours, I did laundry, swept, mopped, and planned a grocery list before deciding that perhaps these contractions weren’t going to actually go away and maybe I should try to get some rest in case this was real labor.  The contractions were about every ten minutes, so sleep wasn’t really working.  When Justin’s alarm went off at 7:30, the contractions picked up to about every five minutes in the half hour that we laid around talking, and I told him that I thought maybe these contractions were different.  He wanted to stay home, but I sent him off to work because I figured that it was going to be a long day…

Getting ready that morning took me quite a while, as the contractions were just bad enough to make me pause for a bit.  I had really thought that I would dust and vacuum my house one last time when I was in early labor, but that was not happening. J  I called my mom and my sister to tell them what was going on, but decided not to call the doctor for a while.  I actually thought I was being pretty patient, waiting until about 1:30 to call.  By that time, it had been 6 hours since my contractions started being 5 minutes apart, so I was told to go right to the hospital. 

Justin took me in and I was taken right up to the labor and delivery triage area, put on a monitor, and checked by one of the residents.  At that point, I was only dilated to a 2, so the resident sent me and Justin walking for an hour to see if I would make any progress.  After that hour (and three fire drills later), I was checked again, only to be told that I was still only a 2.  I was sent home and told to come back in if my contractions continued to be 3-5 minutes apart and when I could no longer walk or talk through them.  At that point, I was already pretty much there, so the thought of going home was daunting and a little scary.  After some tears, Justin and I headed home at about 3:30.

Since this was a Wednesday night, and Justin hadn’t gotten anyone to open up church for him, I had Mom come over to be with me while he went to church.  After eating some dinner, I made myself a nice warm bath, since I have heard many people say how much it helps the pain.  I’m not so sure that it really works all that well, but I spent a good two hours soaking, while my mom sat with me, timing the contractions the whole time.  When the water cooled down too much, I tried bouncing on an exercise ball some and mom gave me some massage, but eventually, I had to get up and start moving around.  When I started leaning against the walls, squatting, and crawling on the floor, Mom texted Justin to tell him to come on home.  It was starting to get really bad, so I called the midwife, who, hearing me pant through a contraction, told me that I sounded pretty uncomfortable and should probably go back to the hospital. 

On the way over, I was really nervous that they were going to send me home again because I only had two contractions during the 15 minute drive.  However, on the wheelchair ride up to labor and delivery, I had three contractions, which really freaked out the transporter. J  It was about 10:00 when I was checked again, and this time I was dilated to a 5!  I was incredibly relieved that I was not going home this time!  There was not a labor room available right away, so we waited in the triage area for about an hour.  The nurse was really great, allowing me to do whatever I needed to do during contractions, as long as I was close enough for the monitor cords to reach.  I was asked if I wanted an epidural and I was so tired that I almost said yes, however, the anesthesiologist was in a C-section and was not available, so that helped make my decision a little easier.  Basically, I was told that I was probably going to go fast enough that there wouldn’t be time for one anyway. 

I’ll spare you all of the little details, but at about 11:00, we were finally put in a labor room, where Justin and I “slow danced” for a quite a while until I was too tired to stand and I decided to try sitting on the toilet.  The contractions became excruciating, so the midwife decided to have me go back to the bed so I could be checked.  I had made it all the way to 8cm!  My water still hadn’t broken, so she decided to go ahead and break it for me, which was the point of no return, with contractions one on top of another.  When I thought I wasn’t going to make it anymore, it was already time to push, and thankfully, I only had to push for 20 minutes and Leah was born!  There had been meconium when they broke my water, so unfortunately, Leah had to be taken right away to be examined and suctioned out, but she was perfectly healthy. 

Honestly, people are right when they say that you forget the pain when the baby is born…not right away, maybe, but right now, my memory of the whole labor is pretty happy actually.  I was very thankful that I went into labor on my own because I was supposed to be induced the morning of the 21^st and since I really wanted to have a natural birth, an induction was not the way I wanted it to go.  My time at home with Mom was a nice bonding time, my nurse and midwife were great at coaching me, and Justin was a champ, holding my hand and cheering me on the whole time.  I had even made a birth plan and didn’t even have to get it out because things just fell into place.  I wasn’t as calm and collected as I had wanted to be, and my throat was sore the next day…but I made it. J  I feel so blessed that after a rocky pregnancy, starting out with a subchorionic hemorrhage, then uncertainty with preeclampsia, and finally a fall, God allowed me to have a smooth labor and gave Justin and I a perfect baby girl!

Since Leah and I were both doing so well, we only stayed in the hospital until Friday afternoon.  When we got home, it was so nice outside that we went for a little walk around the neighborhood!  Our first days at home were a little bit rocky, mostly because I had the baby blues something fierce, but Justin’s parents stayed with us for the first couple of days and we had lots of help.  Justin’s mom did night duty for the first few nights and then my mom took over night duty off and on for several weeks.  My grandma Vogel was in town from Florida and she did grocery shopping for us, did laundry and dishes, came over in the afternoons so I could nap, and also took a night.  We had it so good! 

Leah has been a great baby.  She nurses like a champ, and already weighed 8lb 11oz at her two week visit!!  She is starting to do more eye contact and coo every once in a while, and we are just enjoying each milestone.  Justin is a great dad, taking her out of the room after her early morning feeding so I can get a few hours of really good sleep before he goes to work.  Then, he comes home from work, showers, and takes her again.  He is so smitten with his little princess!  I like to take her out on walks most days, if the weather permits, and am trying to figure out how to fit in things like housework and shopping in between her frequent feedings.  If you come over anytime soon, just be forewarned that things are far from perfect around here.  We are enjoying every minute of it though!  She seriously is growing up way too fast, but we love her so much and are so glad she is in our lives!

 

My last pregnant picture.  This was me mustering up a pathetic smile in between contractions right before we headed to the hosptital the second time.

 

Leah's very first picture.

This is in our postpartum room.  A very tired, but happy daddy!  He wanted to hold her a lot. :)

Memaw is holding her and she is so content. 

Our first family photo. 

The second morning in the hospital, Leah was very fussy!  Her cry was so shrill, Justin said she sounded like a pig.  Thankfully, she isn't fussy very often and she lost that shrill cry very quickly!  The nurses called her a diva. :)

She has such bright eyes!  They are pretty blue right now, and Justin is really hoping they stay that way.  With all of the brown eyes on my side, I'm not sure she has a chance, but we'll see.  We'll enjoy them for now!

A common sight around here.  Daddy comes home and takes over.  Even though she can't smile or interact much yet, he loves to talk to her and tell her how pretty and cute she is. It warms my heart!  I think it helps that she looks so much like him!

This is Leah in the swing all swaddled up.  Also a common sight.  She loves to be swaddled! 

This was her first day going to church.  It was Good Friday and even though she was only a week old, I had to get out of the house!  Justin took her down in the basement away from all of the germy people. ;)  *protective dad*

On a walk with Leah in the moby wrap.  I love having her close!  Next best thing to having her inside me. :) 

So peaceful! 

A fall, a shower, and a hospital stay

Most of you have probably heard about my weekend fiasco.  I thought maybe you would like to hear about it.  It was all just so strange!  (This is really long, so sorry about my rambling.)

My Saturday morning began with me excitedly getting ready for my first baby shower that Heather P. was going to be hosting for me.  I had gotten my outfit ready and straightened my hair the night before so that I could easily get ready and hopefully be on time for once.  I had to finish up my 24 hour urine sample and get it turned it as well as get labs drawn before 10:00, so I wanted to have all my ducks in a row.  Things started to go down hill when in my excitement, I forgot to collect my urine sample, which, being a nurse and knowing how important it is to have all 24 hours worth, caused me great distress!  After stewing about it and thinking it through, I decided to be a bad, non-compliant patient and simply turn it in anyway.  It was only about 2 hours worth and I just had so much going on during the weekend, I wouldn't have been able to collect another 24 hours worth until Monday.  I am starting to strongly dislike doing these tests because you have to plan your life around them!

After I was finally ready, I was starting to get nervous about being late, so I was hurrying to get things out to the car.  I had just gotten in the car when I realized that I forgot my cell phone inside (something that I can't live without...), and made one last trip inside to get it.  On the way out, I tripped on a sidewalk crack, took a few leaping steps to try to correct myself, but ended up falling flat on my belly on the strip of grass right in front of the street.  Needless to say, it happened so fast and was so shocking, I didn't quite know what to do with myself.  It hurt really bad and I had some severe cramps, but all I could think about was getting my sample turned in and getting to the shower on time, so I got up, looked around to make sure no one saw my ridiculous clumsiness, and drove off to the outpatient lab.  I had to wait a while before they could get me back to draw my labs, so of course, I sat and tried to feel the baby move and did a Google search on "falling when pregnant," just to see if I was crazy for worrying or not.  Of course, what I found were mixed reviews of "definitely get checked out!," or "as long as the baby is moving, you're probably fine.  The baby is cushioned really well anyway."  So, what did I do?  I went to my baby shower, of course.  Goodness!  I didn't want to be some worrysome, first time mother!

When I arrived at the shower, I first had to get some reassurance from my sister.  She's had two babies after all.  She asked me if I had called the doctor, and of course, I hadn't.  I started balling.  (Just what every pregnant, glowing mother wants to do at her baby shower with everyone standing around wondering what's up!)  Then Heather asked if everything was okay and I told her the problem, and we both decided I was probably going to be okay, since the baby was still moving pretty normally.  I dried my tears and got on with the shower, trying to have fun, despite a nagging feeling that I was a bad mom and wondering if I had made the right decision.  

Heather P. and me.  She was the gracious hostess!

The wonderful food table, with a fancy diaper bouquet!  

Quite the pile of gifts!

Melissa and Mandy made these adorable hats and booties!  Leah will look so cute!

Natalie brought Adela, who did a great job, even though she really wanted to open some of the gifts!

Everyone brought a book to get my collection started.  I loved that!  It was so fun to see what everyone's favorite was!

Cookie favors in cute baby shapes.

The shower was really wonderful!  I was humbled by how many people showed up and so thankful for all of the wonderful gifts!  The food was yummy and the games were fun, although I failed miserably at all of them. :)  

When I got home from the shower, I left everything in the car so Justin could help me bring stuff in when he was ready.  I called the doctor's office even though it was closed and it said I could stay on the line to talk to the doctor on call, but if it wasn't an emergency, I would have to pay a $25 fee.  So, I hung up.  I couldn't decide if this was an emergency really.  I went out to talk to Justin.  I told him about my little incident and, of course, he didn't know what to make of it.  He said I could make the call if I wanted to, but he couldn't give me any advice. :)  So, I just went inside to have a little snack and lay down.  Thankfully, my mom happened to stop by just then to see what I got at the shower.  She came in and sat down and asked how the shower had gone, and all I could do was say it was fine and then start crying.  (Got to love the hormones!)  After discussing with her, I decided to call the doctor, even if I did have to pay a $25 fee.  (How silly!  Who really cares about $25 when your baby's life is at stake????)  One of the midwives answered the call and told me to go straight to the hospital to be put on the monitor for at least 4 hours.  That's when it hit me that this could really be a problem.  Mom said she would take me, since Justin was in the middle of rebuilding some walls in the garage.  

When we got to the emergency room, they took me right up to the triage area in Labor and Delivery.  I was put on the monitor right away and waited.  The nurse came in to get a bit of a history and when I said that I had fallen that morning around 9:40, she was a little bit stunned (since it was now about 1:45).  She asked what I had been doing and I told her that I had a baby shower.  She didn't really say much about it, but when the doctor came in to get a history and heard the same thing, she also was a bit taken back.  The midwife that I had talked to on the phone said, "Now, you know that your baby's life is more important than a baby shower!"  Wow, did I feel really stupid!!  For the rest of my time in the hospital, I became known as the one who fell and then went to her baby shower anyway.  Each new nurse or doctor that I saw asked if I got some good stuff.  (That made me feel really great...)  

I was told that since it had been a while since I had fallen, I hadn't had any sort of bleeding, and the baby was still moving okay, I would probably not actually have to be on the monitor for the full 4 hours.  I was expecting to be out of there pretty quickly.  I've been having non-stress tests every week for a while now, so I am somewhat familiar with what the baby's heart rate should be doing and what a contraction looks like, so after about a half hour or so, I had Mom pull out the strip so I could look at it.  Of course, just then, my nurse came in and said "Oh no.  I guess you already know what I'm about to say..."  Mom and I just stared blankly, and the nurse informed me that I was having a lot of contractions, so they were going to get an IV started and pump me full of fluids.  (It probably sounds silly that I didn't know I was having contractions, but I didn't really know what a contraction felt like.  I had been having cramping ever since the fall, but it just felt like period cramps and I've been having some of that for a few weeks now.  The doctor has always said that unless they were accompanied by back pain or bleeding, they weren't an issue.)  I got a full liter of fluid pretty fast and then just a maintenance infusion, and I got to stay on the monitor to see if the contractions would stop.  

It was pretty clear after a while that the contractions weren't going away very quickly.  I was having them about every 2-4 minutes, which is when they informed me that I was going to have the privilege of spending the night.  I was checked and hadn't dilated or effaced, but I was still transferred to the antepartum unit, just in case. The best part was that I got to be put on a bed alarm since I was a fall risk...  The night was very uneventful really.  I was put on the monitor every four hours, and each time, I had less and less contractions.  Justin came to visit me for the evening, while Mom went home to shower and do a few things, but Mom stayed the night with me, since Justin had to open up church in the morning.  Besides getting woken up a lot, being uncomfortable, and having to call each time I had to get up, it wasn't a bad hospital stay.  In the morning, I even got a cute little basket full of goodies since it was my birthday.  

What was really strange after all of that was that the contractions didn't end up being the major issue for sending me home.  I guess they had been most worried about the placenta getting disrupted, since that can happen within 24 hours of a trauma like that.  Leah looked fine the whole time, so they let me go home.  What an ordeal!  I went home, took a bath, and slept most of my birthday away.  But at least baby Leah and I are doing fine!  Moral of the story... Go to the hospital if you are pregnant and fall on your belly.  Your shower guests can have a shower without you. ;)

  

Whoa, Baby!

30 weeks 

We had another appointment today.  Since we'll have one every week, I probably won't bore you all with the details every time, but we had a sonogram today. :)  I have to say that I'm not quite sure what I think...  I know that I'll think Leah is perfect and cute when she arrives, but wow, does she have lips and cheeks!!  They did a 3D sono after the regular 2D one, just for fun, and the pictures just make me chuckle every time I look at them.  We took the strip of pictures out to the waiting room with us and just sat there and laughed as we tried to figure out who in the world she looks like!?!  I'm convinced that the lips are Justin's because he does something with his lips similar to Leah's profile.  She is about 3lb 9oz, which is 1lb 9oz bigger than four weeks ago, so she is growing really well!  Makes me feel better about my own growth spurt... Nothing has changed for me, so I get to keep up with the same activity level for another week.  We'll wait to see how my labs are looking next week, after they get the results from today.  My blood pressure has been staying fairly steady, so we are just thankful that everything is going this well!

I think part of why I think this picture is so funny is because her poor eyes look so dark.  She'll turn out okay, right? :)

Look at those lips!  Oh my goodness.  

Another update

Pretty much, nothing has changed since last week, but I thought I would let you know how this week's appointment went.  I had gotten a call yesterday from one of the nurses at the office saying that my labs had come back NORMAL!  Wow!  I thought that maybe I had magically gotten better and all restrictions would be lifted.  However... when I went in today, I found out that everything was staying steady.  Not getting worse, but no, not magically better.  So, I get to continue with the resting as much as possible.  I have been monitoring my blood pressure at home along with my activity, and the doctor was pleased with how steady it has been, so I'm thankful for that.  I've been feeling really great, and my hips are feeling a lot better since I've been up more.  I'm so grateful for all of the wonderful meals that we have been getting, which has definitely made resting more possible.  I've also felt everyone's prayers, and really appreciate all of the encouragement.  I don't feel really nervous about how things are going, especially now that my blood pressure has stabilized a bit and my labs aren't getting worse.  Leah also seems to be doing fine, and I'm so thankful for every day and week that passes and she is still inside of me.  We've made it to 29 weeks already! We'll see her again next week at the next doctor appointment. Yay!

Week by week with baby Leah

I thought I should update you all on my condition, especially since you were probably wondering if you saw me at church, family things, or at the grocery store. :)  I had my third doctor appointment since finding out about my high blood pressure, and it went pretty well.  I officially got the diagnosis of mild preeclampsia today, and had more tests run, but I won't find out the results until next week, when I go in yet again.  We'll get to see the baby again soon, too, because we'll have another sonogram to check for the growth.  (Can't say I'm sad about that...)  Even though my condition hasn't really changed, the two doctors that I have seen have been much less concerned about me staying on strict bed rest, like the first midwife that I saw.  Basically, I was told by both of the doctors that I should rest as much as possible (whatever that means), but I can be up some too.  Pretty much, I have no idea what I'm really supposed to be doing, but I've been getting out of the house some and doing some of the house work, so things don't get so far behind.  Thankfully, I was able to get my registering done, which makes me feel a lot better.  I still feel a bit unsettled because I know that I could be put back on bed rest at any of these weekly appointments.  It's a little bit hard to make plans not really knowing how things will go the next few months, but after just one week of bed rest, I have become much more thankful for the ability to be up and about, even if I do have to take it easy.  My hips are feeling much better!  I'll try to keep everyone updated as things go along, but you can keep praying for me and Leah.  Yes, her name is Leah Clare. I had told some family members, and it got out.  Oh well.  Now you can pray for her by name. :)

When life comes to a screeching halt...

Well, folks, this is one of those days that crying just comes and I have a lot to think about.  But, I'll start with the positives first!  At around 20 weeks, I started to feel really, really great!  My sickness held on for way too long, but thankfully, after 4 1/2 months, I felt better than ever, and was loving being pregnant.  Finding out that we were having a girl was really exciting and getting to see her on that 21 week sono was amazing.  I started to get so attached to her after I saw those images of her and we started calling her by name.  She moves around so much now, and I can tell that she is growing because I can feel her move way up by my ribs.  This part of pregnancy is just awesome!  We got to have another sono today and she is about 2 pounds and looks just perfect.  What a sweet thing!

However, the reason for the sono today was because we needed to make sure that she is growing good because my body is not handling this pregnancy very well.  On Tuesday, I had a routine appointment for 26 weeks and got to do the glucose test.  Thankfully, that turned out fine.  No gestational diabetes!  But, my blood pressure was high.  It was taken 4 times, but they got high readings each time.  That meant that I got to have more blood drawn and also got to do a 24 hour urine test to see if the high blood pressure was causing stress to my kidneys.  I had to wait until this morning to get the results back, but I knew what could happen if the results weren't positive.  My sister Abi had the exact same thing happen to her when she was 26 weeks along with Alex, as many of you probably remember, and she was put on bed rest for 3 months.  Needless to say, I have been a bit of a wreck for the past few days, trying to get as much done as possible.  Justin helped me get the house clean and I did my grocery shopping, and went to a few Christmas parties just to ease the stress. :)

Today, we got the news that I was spilling protein in my urine, which means that I have a mild case of preeclampsia.  My blood pressure was also 166/90... I won't get into the nitty gritty details of this because it's a little hard to explain, but it's dangerous because blood flow is reduced to my organs, including the placenta, which could restrict the baby's growth.  It also just puts a lot of stress on my organs in general and if it would get out of hand, would mean that the baby would need to come out, as this condition disappears shortly after the baby is born.  This is very early for this condition to show up, which is why it is so concerning because my baby still has a long time to 'bake' so that she can be a healthy newborn.

So, now we wait, and I rest.  I have another appointment on Tuesday with one of the doctors, since I will not longer be able to see the midwives.  We'll probably know more then, but we are hoping that we can at least make our trip out to Indiana for Christmas celebrations.  With Abi, they were hesitant to let her come to Morton from Bloomington, so it makes me nervous that we may be stuck at home.  That would be such a bummer!  Besides the holidays, I just realized how much I didn't get done because I thought I had plenty of time.  The baby's room isn't painted, I haven't registered, we haven't gotten the baby's furniture picked out, etc.  All of a sudden, I can't do any of that, which makes me sad.  I am allowed to be up to use the restroom, eat, and shower.  This could be a long 3 months.  Last night, I read in John 6, all about Jesus being the bread of life.  I didn't know for sure then that I would be on bed rest, but it was comforting to read about Jesus being all that we need.  Nothing else really matters in life, but even so, we could really use your prayers!