I'm falling out of love with you...

Metro. We've been in a close and loving relationship for the past seven years. You've been there for fun jaunts around the DC-Metro area. And for the past three years, you've been there for my daily commutes to and from work in addition to the fun times.

Yet, I find myself falling out of love with you. With the last couple of train crashes, the worst being this past July (luckily after I'd decided to stop riding the red line), and with the recent disruptions for track maintenance, I have gotten more and more frustrated with your lack of response. When you close stops, CLOSE ENTIRE STOPS on a HOLIDAY weekend no less, making it incredibly difficult for a lowly qualifier for BMW status (I get around by Bus, Metro, Walking), it makes it difficult to stay faithful. The most recent issue I had was that last night you decided to single track the trains through the biggest transfer stations in all of metro.

Single tracking?! What? Yes. And with very little prior announcements. So it's on the desplay where you can see when the next train is due. So it was on the metro trip planner. But none of those things were apparent until after I was on the platform, after I'd shclepped up and over to the other side only to have to come back because why are there no people on this side? Ugh.

The escalators are ALWAYS down. Always. Going up, going down. Different stops. Different times of the day. It's always a surprise.

I am venting to you that all these little things add up. I've put up with the unreasonable fair hikes with no obvious improvement. I've put up with the old cars even though there are supposedly all new cars somewhere. I've put up with the unbearable heat on the platforms in the hopes that the train car is air conditioned, when IT"S NOT. Trains are not on time. Doors don't open. Entire cars are black, passengers aren't allowed on. Trains randomly unload passengers. No passenger trains frequently pass through stations when it made more sense to pick up people on the way to the end of the line.

Your effort needs to improve, drastically. Changes need to be made. I just wonder if you are able to change.

Stressin' a bit...

I have been filling my days at work with preparing and applying for various positions with the government.

Do any of you, my blreaders (blog readers), realize how time consuming and difficult it is to apply for a government job? I'm applying for specific class, guaranteeing a specified salary with a very clear range for promotion. I, with help, have predetermined I will not apply to classes lower than a specific one based on my experience and education. So, I've created a profile, uploaded my resume and followed the necessary steps to fulfilling the applications through specified online channels. I've gotten a copy of my transcript and my birth certificate to verify education and citizenship. Usually, with the complete application, that should be enough, right? Wrong. There are these things called KSAs (Knowledge, Skills, and Abilities). I hate them. I hate them with a passion. They are different for each job in context and in number. But I've put forth my best effort and submitted a number of them recently, 3 jobs to be exact and 14 questions. 14. Ugh.

Now, these aren't easy questions to be answered in a simple, one paragraph effort. I'm talking full page, multiple paragraph answers. These questions, sometimes filled in online, have character limits of upwards of 8,000. That's right, 8,000. That's crazy. Really crazy.

Anyways, apparently these 3 applications have begun to be reviewed. I have received one outright "sorry, you don't meet the qualifications" and one "you meet the qualifications, but were not in the first group of people to be submitted to the hiring manager." Kind of daunting. But there are supposed to be over a thousand and something jobs opening up in the government, so I have hope. I am submitting 2 more applications later on this week. I'm not looking forward to the KSAs. They give you the questions/statements ahead of time, but I have had two surprise questions thrown at me in the middle of the application process.

So, it's a little stressful. I feel like I'm back in college, writing a paper that counts for my final grade and that's all I have going for me. Except I have to write about myself and what I know as succint as possible in response to an exact issue. Three down, two left. Then we'll see if I continue with this or start in on the private sector.

The Time Traveler's Wife

Dave helped me paw through my boxes of books last weekend and we located the two books I was talking about in my previous post: The Time Traveler's Wife and P.S. I Love You. They happened to be in two differnt boxes and not the first or even second boxes we looked through. But that's just how it always works.

I finished reading about Henry and Clare just this afternoon, shut in my office, "taking lunch" after I had returned from lunch with a friend.

I think I find more and more in this book every single time that I read it that makes me love it even more. The interactions between Henry and Clare and their love for each other is what keeps me hooked. There is humor and romance, anger and happiness, frustration and acceptance. And I take a step back and realize, while some major details are so very different, Henry and Clare's life could be any young couples. It's about finding the person that makes you want to be a better person, but accepts you and loves you exactly as you are - faults and everything. It's about waiting for, finding and loving and giving up the person that completes you.

There are so many different situations these same emotions could apply to, that they make the book almost universal. You have to, of course, take into account The Time Traveler himself, but otherwise... It's about waiting. Waiting to see him, waiting for him to come back to her, always waiting, with very little to hold onto. And life continues. Always, life continues. Doesn't that sound familiar?

Arem't we all waiting for something? Whether it's somebody or something it doesn't really matter. Whatever we're waiting for has more meaning to us as an individual that any of us really let on. Most of us die-hard romantics are waiting for that special someone and wondering if it's really the person we're with and if it is why do we feel like we're settling in some unspoken compromise? And if it isn't, where is my special someone and why am I still with this current beau? Another quesiton we ask is "Is this what they call true happiness?" I know most days that it's hard to admit to ourselve, but all these questions have so much bearing on our lives. And yet, life continues. We might feel like we're stuck, standing still, gazing out of a window as life swirls by down the street.

Pensive, I'm moving onto P.S. I Love You.

So do I vent about my job or pick a different subject? I didn't get any suggestions for new reads on the last post... But I could talk about what I'm currently reading, I could talk about the a couple movies I've seen lately: Harry Potter and The Ugly Truth. There is, of course, the event of Michael Jackson's death that occurred since I last posted - and of which I am getting sick of all the news updates on. There are the T.V. shows I'm currently enjoying. Then there's the puppy I want... a cute little puppy. No particular one in mind, just a puppy. I have also discovered that CVS brand Pringles chips are not the same as actual Pringles. Blech! I also found out that there is a "Horse Whisperer" and he did a show with Cesar Millan (the Dog Whisperer - really good show btw). I could also talk about the book I've been wanting to read for quite some time but can't find in my room of boxes... My books have been boxed up since I moved out of my crazy apartment in DC and in with my boyfriend. ALL my stuff (except for my couch) fits into one bedroom.

The book is entitled "The Time Traveler's Wife" and the movie based on the book comes out in August. I read it soon after it came out in paperback and have read it several times a year since then. It's one of those books that I pick up to feel better and calms me. I can say that it helps me put my life back into perspective. I know everyone loses perspective sometimes and this book helps me get back in touch. I don't know why. There are no similarities between my life and the book. It's just one of those feel-good books. So, I want to find it. And I am so excited that they are finally coming out with a movie. Essentially, the story is about waiting... For some reason, that concept draws me in. Maybe because we're all waiting. Waiting to find that other person on this planet that is our other half. That is something I truly believe. Regardless of languange, looks, race, education, location, and gender, there is another person out there that I (and you!) are meant to be with. And I feel like this book epitomizes that belief. I feel affirmed, relaxed, and at ease after reading it. But it's also one of those books that you either love it or hate. There isn't really an in between. I love it. My mom hates it. Don't know why, she just doesn't like the story at all. Interesting.

P.S. I Love You is a feel-good book, too. Even though it's such a sad story, it's also a book about healing and understanding that it's ok to move on and, essentially, let go. Acceptance. Another one I've read multiple times and keep going back to.

Ok. It's decided. I need to dig through my boxes of books and find these two books. And soon.

I think it's good that I realize that there are times where I need those absorbing distractions in order to get back in touch with where I am, what I'm doing, where I'm going and where I've gone. I think that one needs to take a step back and observe in order to understand and move forward on the path that is the best path at that time. To help you make better choices.

Yep, that time again.

Book Review

I recently finished a book that intrigued me and had me pondering whether I should read the book this one had been inspired by.  I will, soon, but at the moment I'm still trying to digest my latest, but not only, read.

Ahab's Wife: The Stargazer was much better than I had originally thought.  Granted, I bought and started this book probably over a year ago and just now picked it back up to give it another try.  There was something about it that had intrigued me the first go around, but I hadn't had the patience.  

The author, whose name escapes me, took three quotes (long and short) from Herman Melville's Moby Dick about Captain Ahab's wife and ran with them.  Her novel threw me for a loop.  Not at all what I was expecting, this particular read took relationships between men and women from that time period, the late 1800s, and put a more modern slant on them solely through the main character's perspective and idealogy throughout her life.  The novel initially grabs your attention by tugging on your heartstrings but continues to captivate you as you see the growth of the heroine and the people around her as the author tells her history and how she came to be Captain Ahab's wife (to paraphrase) "Captain Ahab was neither my first husband nor my last."  

There's something about a strong feminine lead character.  The novel is not an easy read.  But the reader has the privilege of viewing how the character, Una, came to be Captain Ahab's wife and her strength in becoming a whaler's wife at that.  Of course, the author touches on Ahab himself but briefly and the majority of the novel is about Una's spiritual and mental acceptance of Ahab's growing obsession with Moby Dick and even demonstrates how Ahab stays with her into her next marriage.  Of course there is much more to the piece than I can put into words at this time. 

It made me think.  There are little subplots about people that touch her life and contribute to the strong woman she becomes, such as a slave girl, a midget bounty hunter, Margaret Fuller, and a scientific family in the coastal town near Nantucket that she comes to live in purely because it is a port Ahab's ship put into, as close to where she was raised as possible. An extraordinary journey put so eloquently to words.

I highly recommend the read.  It's hard, intense, but well worth the time and effort.

Does anyone out there have any recommendations for me? I'm an avid reader... I devour books if not daily then weekly and find myself in search of topics, authors that I haven't yet experienced.  Suggestions welcome!

-Carmen 

Just some random thoughts...

I got off of work wanting to blog. About no particular subject, just to write about whatever came to mind.

I have been dealing with several different issues at work that have left me physically and emotionally drained. Hopefully, the most important one is being dealt with sometime this week. But those things aren’t what I want to blog about. I’ve been talking and complaining about those issues too much for the last two weeks or so. So, do I blog about a topic on tv right now? What about an update on my life? Hmm…

Well, I’ve finally resolved the problems with my landlord. I moved out. And in with my boyfriend. Mother took it much better than I could have expected. Calmly, rationally, and logically. Which is what I should have expected, but didn’t. I’ll keep you updated on how that goes. It cuts my rent in half and makes it easier to get a home-cooked meal. We both want to cook more and it will be a lot easier together than apart. Plus, his mom has us over for dinner at least once a week and she’s an awesome cook! Lucky me! The commute is not an issue. There are several options open to me and I’m already familiar with the route from his place to work. So that’s good. Oh, did I mention that I no longer have to deal with my crazy landlady? That’s lovely in and of itself.

I am currently dog sitting once again. Breaking up the monotony of the normal routine, staying in his lavish place in Dupont Circle has been relaxing. My attorney’s dog, a beautiful, gentle, English Setter (Cedar), loves to cuddle and just be around me. I never realized that having a pet is a relaxing thing. He, the dog, loves unconditionally and asks nothing in return but my attention and a few walks. It’s nice, Cedar loves to cuddle so I am never cold at night. It’s nice for me, too, because my attorney lives literally 4 blocks from my job. It’s lovely to be able to walk to and from work. And the arrangement is beneficial to my attorney because he doesn’t have to pay to have Cedar boarded somewhere and he knows his home is safe while he is traveling. I do sitting anywhere from one night arrangements to 2 weeks. Usually, whenever my attorney travels – work or leisure – I dog-sit. And I get a little cash out of it.

What I simply cannot get over is that I find it very difficult to be warm on the main floor. Heat rises, but I’ve never experienced it like this. The top floor is always stuffy and sometimes unbearably warm. Of course, the top floor is a bedroom, office and full bathroom. – the guest room that my attorney has begun to call “Carmen’s room.” Yep, that’s how often I dog-sit.

And then there are the topics on tv. In the hour or so I’ve been sitting here after work, eating dinner, playing with Cedar and contemplating this blog post, I have watched a show about sexual taboos followed by a show about the Amish teenager’s rumspringa. An interesting tradition - to allow the teenagers to experience the outside world for a time before being baptized into the Amish church – they seem to go crazy with their freedom. They must throw some CRAZY parties!! On a more serious note, I think that the tradition is a good idea. Why restrict a teenager, at a time when they’re questioning everything, from experiencing the world outside Amish culture? It gives them the opportunity to determine for themselves if being Amish and conforming to all the rules and regulations of the religion is what they really and truly want. But there is always a negative aspect of the whole ordeal. The teenagers are not taught about the outside world and have no one to follow for an example on how to deal with certain issues they may encounter, such as drug abuse. To continue to defend the practice, drug abuse is wide spread and a danger to everyone and it is hard to overcome peer pressure in any situation. I can only imagine what it is like as Amish teenager – they’re already so different from mainstream, the peer pressure must be horrific during they’re rumspringa.

I thought it was hard enough growing up. I can’t imagine being Amish. Seriously, would you be able to function without technology? I read an article recently about a class in LA that did an experiment. For one week the class went without technology and kept a journal about their reactions and progress (or lack thereof). It made me think. Could I do it? The answer to that is no, a hard, definite no. I am checking my email constantly on my blackberry and on my computer. I use my iPod throughout the day and to and from work. I watch tv when I get up in the morning and when I get home from work. I listen to the radio constantly. Anything is possible if you put your mind to it, but I don’t know that I would want to put my mind to doing that.

And NCIS has come on. Good show.

~ Carmen

Censorship and Choice

http://www.broadcastingcable.com/article/210192-Supreme_Court_Backs_Government_Regulation_of_Fleeting_Expletives.php?rssid=20065

So censorship. This is a topic I have mixed feelings about. For the most part, I don't agree with censorship. I know that there are a lot of people that don't like or can even stand cussing. I also understand that in a professional environment or around children, certain language is, and will always be, inappropriate.

At the same time, if there are a few cuss words hear or there throughout a program on live-TV, I find it incredibly arbitrary, for lack of a better word, to fine the program and bleep the word. I don't even like it when a movie on live-TV is watchmacallit- I can't remember what it's called when they do a speak-over of the curse word in a movie with a regular exclamatory word. If you remember what I'm talking about, leave it in a comment. Anyways, that bugs the crap out of me. In my opinion, it actually takes away from the movie. Besides, if that language is in the movie, then I don't think little kids should be watching it or it's up to the parent's discretion.

In fact, that's what I think about most censorship. Why is the government imposing moral standards on people when it pertains to something as minor as a few cusswords?? Listening or watching programs with that language on it should be a choice people are allowed to make.

Which leads me to directly into another issue: that of choice. What's with the past administration taking as many choices away from us as possible? In case you don't get what I'm getting at, I'm pro-choice. Now, contrary to what has been said about people of my following, that does not mean I'm pro-abortion. It means that I believe that abortion should be a choice each woman has to make for herself. This is not to say that I would make that choice, but it does mean that I do not look down on people who do nor do I believe that if presented with the opportunity that many teenagers will use it as a form of brith control. Also, who are you (figuratively, not literally YOU as an individual) to say whether or not a young person has the right to purchase the Plan B pill? Is it possible that they used protection but something happened and they want to ensure that nothing happens? It's to prevent pregnancy, not END it. Again, it's a choice that the conservatives have attempted to take away from us.

But now I'm off topic and rambling.

Anyways, thoughts on censorship? I agree with daytime television, but during the hours when children should be in bed? Why censor then? If a person doesn't want to watch it, change the channel, read a book, magazine, find a censored version on the internet. There are other options available. And I can see that the same argument can be made for those of us that want to watch the un-censored version. Happy medium, anyone?

Besides, there's so much violence on mainstream tv without the curse words, does the language really matter? Prime time television has gotten so violent and graphic that it's hard for me to watch and I've become squeamish! I never used to be squeamish. Now I can't even watch someone on tv get their blood drawn. Me! The person who's had to "stab" herself multiple times daily since she was just under 2 years old. Lame. But we're more concerned with the language than the actual content of the show. Isn't this why they came out with the rating system? First movies and then tv? But I feel like they've stepped away from the rating of prime time tv because of the violence. Is CSI rated? All the cop shows like Law and Order SVU? I don't think so... but I could be wrong and just not paying attention to the first few minutes of the show. I mean, I know they have that first part that says it's violent and not reality, but still. Maybe I've just not noticed. Enh, whatever.

Alright, I just had these thoughts running through my mind. Opinions?

Opinions

I had planned to sit down and finally do a blog about my opinion about Facebook and MySpace' ethical ramifications in the education sector or even their influences on recruiting and hiring. I have thoughts on censorship that I'd like to hear others perspectives of.

But I got sidetracked. It's been a while since I blogged last- I got distracted by various other things going that are neither here nor there. But when I saw that a person I know from home tried to post the following link on their Facebook profile declaring for all the world to see that "it's great to see someone with the courage to standup to loud mouth idiots and take a stand no matter what the consequences," I couldn't help myself.

Link: http://video.msn.com/video.aspx?mkt=en-US&vid=edfbca5d-d2c2-4d7c-944e-2a12c45f84a3

Now, this is about Miss California's answer to Perez Hilton's question at the Miss USA pageant on Sunday night.

anyways, I was bothered by this Facebook profile comment mainly because the person referred to those with opposing opinions as "loud mouth idiots." I could care less if that's a personal opinion about Perez Hilton. My issue is with the fact that in linking "loud mouth" idiots with the fact that they're happy Miss California stood up and took a stand "no matter what the consequences" makes it a reference to all of those who opposer her opinion on gay marriage.

Regardless of the person voicing the opinion and whether you agree or disagree with it, respect should still be accorded that person and, frankly, referring to them as "loud mouth idiots" isn't respect. I believe that this particular persons opinion goes deeper than face value of their comment. I mean that I think they do not agree with gay marriage and get worked up when people voice that they are not opposed. I'll come back to this.

I don't understand people who have nothing of value to say when faced with something they disagree with. You know, those people that can only call others names instead of intelligently debating the issue at hand with legitimate facts or simply being able to state that they disagree due to personal beliefs but in turn respect that everyone has (and has the right to have) their own beliefs. I'm not sure if I'm getting this across right. Basically, these are the people that call you stupid instead of being able to put their own opinion into words without getting heated and angry. I could care less if they agree with Miss California-- it's the manner in which they portrayed their agreement with the statement. There was no reason to call anyone a "loud mouth idiot." The question came from a judge and was relevant to the time period and accompanied other questions of the political persuasion.

I used to get mad, heated, worked up when faced with people like this. But now? Now I'm just disappointed that people that act like this end up being "important" people, people of influence, people of power. I don't understand how people with such a complete and utter lack of understanding can be put into positions with power/influence. But it happens every day and I think it mainly comes down to the fact that a growing number of people have stopped thinking for themselves. It's sad, I know. But I think it's true. Why? Because these same people that can do nothing but point fingers at people and call them names rather than voice a relevant and thoughful argument, are just that. They are people that do not know enough about the sunject at hand on a factual basis to have a debate. They are people that are told that somehting is bad/wrong and instead of looking into it for themselves, believe what they are told wholeheartedly. And they'll fight for it! How do you fight for something you really don't understand? I understand if you don't agree but can you tell me WHY you don't agree? Most often, no, they can't. Or they say simply, "It's how I was raised." I'm sorry what does that mean? I get some actions- like how many knives you use at the table to butter your bread and whether or not you are ok with bread crumbs in the butter tub- are a result of how you were raised. But your beliefs? Your opinions? Aren't those supposed to be based off of how you feel about things? And how do you know you feel a certain way about a subject if you don't know anything about it?!?

Sadly, from my own personal experience, this is (or was and seems to still be) the norm with the person that posted the comment on their Facebook. I was never able to get past this personality quality of this person in high school and, apparently, would still have this issue today. What surprised me the most in high school is that this person excelled on our Debate team and was a speaker at graduation. It used to make me angry, and even defensive, when this person got like this. I had the unfortunate luck to have what appeared to be completely opposing opinions and views with this person and was often yelled at or called names or the like because of my beliefs and the fact that I really just wanted the respect of a fellow debator to be heard. That's it really, just heard. This person never did have the patience for that or the intelligence to realize that they could develop their own opinions further (whether to affirm their stance or to cause reflection of their beliefs) rather than to just dismiss what I had to say without even giving me the chance to say it. Not only is that rude, but it's obtuse.

I may not always agree with what people have to say, but I'm more than willing to listen to what they say. In fact, I like hearing what people of different opinions/perspectives/views have to say about certain issues whether I agree with them or not.

Now, continuing on with Miss California's comment. I agree with Perez Hilton. While I understand that the competition is mainly about looks and such, a good POLITICALLY CORRECT answer is necessary when faced with such a question. Otherwise how can we expect you to represent the ENTIRE country, regardless of your personal beliefs? While I don't agree with beauty pageants as a whole, you do have to be able to present yourself in a certain fashion to win, if that is, in fact, your ultimate goal. She knew after she'd made the comment that she'd lost the title. But she doesn't regret her answer. For that I give her props. On the other hand, she couldn't have expected to win with such an answer. Not only was it incorrect because she said "in my COUNTRY" when she probably meant to say family, town or something close to her, but you have to be able to convince the judges you represent the majority of the U.S.'s people. I'm sure there are those of you that would disagree with me- that's your right- but you do have to realize that there are those of us out here (and we're a growing number) that support gay marriage, more, complete gay equality. That is fact. If that goes against your religious beliefs, it's still a personal belief. Religion is not uniform across the country (no matter how people feel). Simply, not everyone believes as she does, so she did need to stay more in the middle with her answer. I think a "I would prefer not to answer this question due to personal beliefs. " or a "Personally, I can't answer the question, but I think that it should be left up to each state to decide separately on behalf of their voting population." Those answers would have been acceptable and maybe, just maybe she would have won. Who knows? I do kno that Perez gave her a poor score because of the way she answered the question.

Miss California, and the Facebook poster, have a right to their opinion, I respect it, but I disagree.

New shoes..

I've always wondered how people get into running. I'm one of those athletes that has never experienced a "runners high." And I call myself an athlete?! Yes, I do. I swim. That's my sport. I don't swim competitively anymore but I still classiby myself as such simply because that's the environment in which I feel the most comfortable. The east at which you glide through the water and the rythm of the stroke and your breathing has always intrigued me and continues to do so, but it's hard to find a pool that's nice and close by.

I avoid gyms. I don't like the look., the smell, the way people look at you in them. I constantly feel like I'm being stared at--am I dont something awkwardly? I know I look funny... Those types of feelings make it more appealing for me to just stay at home and enjoy a good book. I like to go on walks and randomly dog-sit for my attorney, but that doesn't do much for you if it's on a consistent basis. However, because I am out of shape and do little to-- ok, ok, fine--do no exercise at all on a regular basis (and I should), I joined the crowd of people that go and stretch and run and walk naked around the locker rooms all without really associating with each other. I joined Bally's for $30/month, no contract, no start up fees, cancel at any time. The locker room isn't that bad, there are locations everywhere and most of them have, yep you guessed it: POOLS.

And I've been running.

It's not much, I'm incredibly out of shape, but it's something right? I gave it a couple of weeks and then went shopping this weekend. I've enjoyed it, surprisingly. I've been tryin to go a minimum of 3 times a week. I haven't done more than that, but I'm working up to it. So, finally getting into a semi-regular exercise and more, running, I bought a couple of gym "outfits" and a nice little gym bag for the essentials. I go before work and found Saturdays, while busy, nice. I am averaging a 12 minute mile- sometimes more and sometimes less. But I do a 5 minute brisk walk to warm up (after stretching of course) and then I run consistently for 10 or 15 minutes, followed by a cool down and more stretching. I just reached my 15 minutes run and let me tell you, it was hard. I don't run very fast, but consistently stick between 4.8 and 5.5mph on the treadmill.

Then a former paralegal came and visited on Fridya. She used to lead the running group at my firm. She's an incredible motivator.

That afternoon I decided I would run a 5K. That's about 3.1 miles. I figure I'm not setting my goals too high, but still, it's something I'm going to have to get serious about. And I think that's what I need. I don't really have an excuse not to go to the gym 3 times a week, or not to run 10-15 minutes consistently each time, but I still find myself making them up and skipping out. But now I have a reason to NOT come up with excuses.

I have looked up local 5K events and have picked two out that I would like to participate in. Since each run has a fee, that limites my interest in participating in more than a couple. One run I have decided on the proceeds go to the Jevnile Diabetes Research Foundation, an organization that obviously means a lot to me as I have juvenile diabetes. The other run is in support of the Maryland Center for Veterans. Dave is a veteran and is a Marylander, so that sounded good to me.

Now, I just need better shoe...

More about Watchmen

If the author of the graphic novel DISASSOCIATES himself with the film, you know it's not gonna live up to the comic/book.

See here:

http://www.latimes.com/entertainment/news/reviews/la-et-watchmen5-2009mar05,0,7515031.story

-c

I know, I know, another post...

But please read on... I've been waiting for this news for a couple weeks...

You remember in an earlier post that I had an inspector come and check out my apartment.  Well, I called her again today because I haven't received my copy of the violation notifications she sent out.

Well, I should be hearing from my landlord soon!  Ms. Booth, the inspector, printed another copy for me and actually dropped it off at my apartment (shoved under my door)!!

I have no idea when my landlord will get their copy or when I actually get the copy that was sent in the mail, but I don't really care at this point.

Anyways, the papers showed me what the fines my landlord is facing for each violation.

- inadequate heat: $1000

- lack of a fire extinguisher:  $2000

- dryer not venting:  $2000

- windows not being winterized:  $500

Grand total for treating me like I'm stupid and not working with me the first go around:  $5500.

Now, these fines are only applicable if my landlords don't make the necessary repairs in the time frame given.

Either way, they still have to pay to fix everything and that's not cheap! But, not my problem.  If my landlords don't fix it and the inspector has to come out again there's a $90 fee for that, and then if they still don't fix it the Department of Consumer and Regulatory Affairs can fix it themselves, charge my landlords' and place a lien on their house if payment is not made. 

I don't even think I should feel guilty at all. I've been without heat technically all winter, but officially since the beginning of February.  The other issues addressed above were not raised by me, but by the home inspector so they've been violations for who knows how long. 

There's another issue.  There is no way she can evict me.  I pay rent on time and in full every month EVEN with all these problems with the heat.  I have not violated my lease in any shape or form.  So she has to fix these problems and/or adjust my lease... I'm not sure what can be done at this point. But we'll see. 

Anyways, I think she's gonna try to evict me or present her work order for the last repair (I think she got ripped off because it didn't fix ANYTHING) to the heating system and think she's good. BUT the work order is dated BEFORE the inspection. HAHAHA! So there! But I'm looking just to make sure I have some place to go.  

Ahh relief.  If I could only be a fly on the wall that speaks French when they get their copy of the violations...

-C 

WATCHMEN (spoiler alert)

SPOILER ALERT~~~~~ SPOILER ALERT~~~~~

I'm about to go into detail about a new movie I saw this weekend. If you haven't seen WATCHMEN, please don't read any further. I don't want to ruin if for anyone becasue, after all, the following is just MY opinion.

First off, I haven't read the book/graphic novel this movie was based on. I'll admit, that's probably why I didn't enjoy the movie--lack of background will do that do you. But still...

Ok. I sincerely feel that purchasing the tickets for Watchmen this past weekend was a complete waste of my money and time: 20 bucks for a 3 hour movie that was so terrible I left early. I've never left a movie before it's ending. Never.

Now, the effects were amazing. That was the only good thing throughout the entire 3 hour movie. (Do I need to reiterate that the movie was 3 hours long?)

The acting was bad. Cliche and cheesey. Not exactly what I was looking for in a superhero movie. I mean, some cheesiness is expected (they are, after all, superheroes with super powers, right?).

What was with the Blue man?? Did his wiener have to be hanging out throughout the ENTIRE movie? Really? Was that necessary?? There was one scene where he was wearing an ugly weird version of underwear and several more scenes in which he's wearing a full suit. I'm not incredibly conservative when it comes to clothing (or the lack thereof) but it was distracting! It's one thing if everyone is completely naked with all their junk hanging out but it's entirely differnt if it's just the one guy (who also happens to be blue and glows).

Given the underlying political/social theories (this was one deep movie, people), I think the reason behind the Blue Man not wearing underwear portrayed his (representing a piece of society) disconnect and apathy towards the rest of society. An it's-not-my-problem-I-don;t-want-to-be-involved type attitude. Ok. That I can buy.

On the topic of what I could buy or not:

-Nixon getting elected 5 times- can't/didn't buy it. I understand the political/historical undertones with this decision (the extension of the Cuban Missile Crisis (as a base point for the societal problems), the kennedy assisantion as an example of the deterioration of American society) but come on! Nixon? 5 times? Really?

-The movie takes place in the 1980s. could they not think up a more recent battle that could ultimately end in World War III and the entire anhilation of the human race that was more recent? It was hard to grasp. There was their flying car. I guess I just found it hard to grasp because the science in the movie was so much more advanced than ours now and it's long past the 1980s. But I guess that's where the superheroes come in (one of which is the "Smartest Man in the World").

Moving on.

I didn't like how the opening credits took so long. Ok it did give some background to the prior set of superheroes that were either killed or succumbed to corruption to get by. But they were about 10 minutes long! I was lost before the actual movied started. And it took so long to put the background into perspective with the rest of the movie. They also threw random bits of additional background information at us throughout the rest of the movie. So confusing.

I understood (at least I think I did, hopefully for the most part anyways) that the underlying philosophy was about hte state of manking and what steps might be necessary to save it. I get that not everyone, even superheroes, are strong enough to avoid corruption or to stay completely true to why they started their fight. (On a side note, Rorschach, remained true to his character and died for it in the end even though it was a "happy" ending (the better of two evils was accepted by the group of superheroes)).

I thought there was too much dialogue. Too much pointless chatter between characters that didn't connect to other issues, scenes or even helped with character growth. Now that was disappointing. And way to dramatic to boot. Throw it in our faces that society is headed downhill, why don't you? Could you be any more blunt about it? Sheesh.

I know I mentioned that it was really confusing before, but it was so hard to follow! It didn't seem like it was going in a very "straight" direction. There were so many twists and turns and details thrown at us that it was very confusing. That takes away from the movie experience.

I admit, I'm not the greatest movie critic. I don't watch movies to be left thinking about the philosophy behind them (sad I know) . I go to be entertained, sometimes this does mean a political/philisophical movie is what I choose, but not last night. For three hours last night, I could have been doing something more entertaining or even productive than hoping Watchmen got better.

I'm gonna try the book to see if that changes my feeling about this movie. Hell, maybe I need to watch the movie again.

-C

Books.. (spoilers involved)

Ok. So I love to read. No, really, I LOVE to read. I read anything , well mostly. Science fiction, romance, non-fiction, politcal, suspense, horror, philosophy. Basically, I'll read it if it catches my interest.

I have most recently put down two good books. I'm going to apologize now for not remembering the author's names.

The first was disturbing, highly disturbing. It was one of those that almost gave me nightmares, but not quite. I think it was because it was so realistic and so well written. Surprisingly so. Especially for the topic.

Heartsick is a book about a cop that is called back onto his old task force because there's another serial killer in his town that is similar to the one he spent his career following and finally put away. The way the stories of the two serial killers was intertwined was choppy at times, but well done. I don't want to give much away on the off-chance that one of you might pick it up. I will warn you that it is violent and very graphically violent. It goes through the ten days the first serial killer held the detective captive and what she did to him during those 10 days, in the end killing him, bringing him back and turning herself in in the process.

That's right. The background story is about a female serial killer. That's what caught my eye. The way the author explored the relationship between the detective and "his" serial killer was enthralling. I could hardly put the book down. She, yes, the author is female also, puts Stolkholm's syndrome into a completely different perspective than we usually expect. She held a strong male detective captive and at her mercy for 10 days after he spent 10 years following her killings. Amazing.

A surprisingly short read given the subject matter but well written. I wasn't satisfied with the ending, very anticlimactic, but it left me thinking and I love books that do that.

The Road Home was the most recent book I finished (just last night as a matter of fact). I read this book every chance I had over the last two days and am still thinking about it. The story is about death and the relationship between mother's and daughter's (in-law to be exact), the trials life presents you and, ultimately, the healing process of coming home after so many years away. It just so happens that these two women's home was a Mennonite community in Lancaster, Pennsylvania. What makes it interesting is that you learn about the main characters on their ultimate road trip from Las Vegas, Nevada through Moab, Utah and the Plain states to Pennsylvania. It was an interesting way to spin the tale, but what I found more interesting is the way the mother had moved out of the Mennonite community and ultimately "gave up on God, because He gave up on me" but gradually returned to her faith the closer she got to home. The tug and pull of home and the roll religion plays in our lives were two large topics throughout the book. The other was the strength of the female characters.

After some time to think about this book, the obvious presence of religion was kind of a turn-off but at the same time, the return to the Mennonite culture is what made me think. One woman had practically been raised in Las Vegas, Nevada so it was interesting to see her reaction to the "quiet" of her new home and the "friendliness" of the people. As an added twist, you also experience the "contamination" of the community by big business and other current problems.

Two reads I recommend.

luv,
Carmen

I can't really express how ultimately feel about this book. I'm still absorbing it.

Snowed In...

Yep, you read that right. We were snowed in on Monday of this week. I found this hilarious. It reminded me of my first official "Snow Day" at GW. "We never close for snow," said my RA... that winter proved her wrong. The first day we closed for snow, I couldn't believe it! I think at most there was 2-3 INCHES of the scary white stuff on the roads, quickly turning to slush... Enough to make a footprint but not much else and we were closed! I mean the city didn't now how to handle it!

Monday was much the same. I called out at the first opportunity, of course. Why miss a perfectly good Snow Day? Once I determined that my firm was indeed open (despite the majority of Virginia and Maryland schools closed and news of car wrecks mounting), I decided I wasn't going to risk it.

I had stayed with Dave in anticipation of extremely low temperatures (and the apparent continuous lack of heat in my apartment) and wasn't about to risk his car getting hit by some other crazy driver or even sliding into something because it doesn't have four-wheel drive... So, I changed back into my sweats and we hunkered down for an all day veg session with his TiVo, some snacks and much deserved cuddling and napping. Oh it was nice!

I didn't want to return to work on Tuesday. Who would have? But I was rested and worked a couple of hours overtime in order to make up the massive amounts of sick leave I took last week for various drs appointments and the home inspector (see previous blog). I was sad to find out that the paralegal that was moved to take over the secretarial duties of one of my main attorneys has returned to her paralegal duties. :( I had enjoyed the brief time we had "worked" together, but apparently dealing with attorneys directly wasn't her cup of tea.

Now, I understand this. They are moody, volatile, prone to angry outbursts at the first person they can find for no reason at all, and inconsiderate. Yes, I say this about all attorneys. The only exception to this are those attorneys that have worked as legal secretaries or paralegals before obtaining said attorney status. Why make the distinction? Frankly, the attorneys that never had to deal with the moody, inconsiderate, and volatile attorneys they take after, have no idea how to treat the people that support them. And oftentimes don't even communicate well enough for people to understand what needs to be done by when. I've learned to deal with this. It's something you have to learn to let roll off your shoulders. Say what you need to say in your defense and then let it go. If it becomes an issue then you need to have someone else step in for you. But, on the paralegal-turned-secretary-turned-paralegal's defense (whew! say that 5 times fast!), understanding this about the anal, controlling personalities that are attorneys is something that can only be done with a learning curve.

There isn't one here.

I'm serious. I was thrown into one of the largest trademark cases not only in the firm, but probably the country, without anyone telling me what it is exactly that I am responsible for. The person I replaced was long gone and there was no one that really knew how anything was organized, or where it was, or how it was maintained... nothing. But I was expected to hit the ground running. And, luckily for me, I did. I credit my ability to do this entirely to my experience at Bonner. Amazing, I know, but I was the only paralegal on the largest case at that time. Everything that came in or went out regarding that case went through me. I dealt with two founding partners, three senior partners, and 3-4 associates, not to mention secretaries (and no offense to any secretaries, but they get ridiculously territorial for no reason!). I filed documents, I drafted documents, I did research, I handled the discovery process, I lived and breathed that one case for two years. Needless to say, I know my litigation. And I can handle attorneys.

But I was still surprised by the lack of a learning curve here. There is no one who will sit down with you and explain something you have a question about. Not one single person. On my first review here, my supervisor said that I ask too many questions, but seem to be handling it well (keep in mind that she had (and still has) absolutely no idea what it is that I do).

I'm resigned to the fact that none of the other trademark paralegals even WANTS to know what it is that I do. They're scared. The turnover for my position has been about 8 or 9 people in the last 10 years. That's crazy! But what I have come to learn is that it means they work the person in this posiiton too hard, with no respect, and complete disregard for the fact that each new person has to learn (and FIX) what the last person has done.

To my benefit, I have taken this position and made it roll as smoothly as possible. I can comfortably say that I have handled this position better than in the past and I have managed it stellarly. What can I say? I do my job and I do it well. I take pride in what I do and do it right. This is not to say otheres don't, it's just that I am almost obsessive compulsive about how well I do my job. Not only do I know EXACTLY where every case that I am responsible is at any given time, it is up to date and in order. I have put into place a sign-out/in sheet in order to keep track of which secretary takes which case for which attorney and when and when it is returned. I also routinely ship closed cases off-site, bug attorneys to tell me what can go off-site and shift things around so that I utilize the space in my office better and in a more organized fashion. Did I mention I keep a list of my cases, in numerical order, by attorney? Not just on paper but in the filing cabinets as well.

Ok. This is just so you can see that I understand how attorneys want things and how to do them. The other trademark paralegals don't handle litigation so their lack of understanding is... understandable. If you've never done litigation, you need someone to help you and be there to answer your every question correctly the first time. It's hard, people! Complicated- there is so much to keep track of not to mention that each attorney's work style is drastically different. I can't say that I know all there is to know about trademark law at this point. I don't have anyone to ask those kinds of questions anymore. I did have problems with my prior main attorney, but he was a mentor and took the time out of his day to answer any and all of my questions regarding the legal process. The fact that no one does that here, not only astounds me but makes me sad. My paralegal-secretary friend could have been amazing if given the chance. She was excited and wanted to learn something new, but deciphering scribble and handwritten notes instead of face to face instructions doesn't enable anyone to learn or (cheesey I know) be all they can be.

Well, this post really took a change in direction. Funny how our minds work.

Now, I'm off to see how cold it is in my apartment. I hope it's warm enough I can stay there tonight. While I love spending time with the BF, there's nothing like being home amidst your OWN things and NOT living out of a bag!

luv,
Carmen

Codeine makes me nauseous...

Yep, I'm on codeine people, because I have bronchitis.  It started out as a pretty severe cold because... oh that's right, because I don't have heat.

Well, let's get this straight.  I have some heat. It's been determined that my apartment's electricity is ENTIRELY separate from my landlord's above me.  BUT my heat pump has been broken for who-knows-how-long.  Long enough that the technician from Michael & Sons to ask if I'd had AIR CONDITIONING this summer... ugh.

My landlord continues to deny the fact that I didn't have heat.  Her logic makes no sense, because if I didn't have heat (and didn't complain of the lack of such, then why did she have the heater looked at and then subsequently fixed??? I'm as confused by this as you are.

Her arguments get better.  She says my problem with high electric bills were that I was running the heat all day and all night... ummm as far as I know, you're supposed to have it on ALL the time, just change the temperature up or down depending on if I'm home or not, but to turn it completely off and then back on COSTS more (at least according to Pepco- my electric company).   She goes on to tell me that in order to heat my apartment properly I should turn OFF my heater when I'm not there and when I am there to only turn it on for about 2 hours at night when it's really cold.  When it's on for those 2 hours a night, I should set it at 80 degrees or above. :-O HOLY CRAP. because doing that won't shoot my bill thru the roof AGAIN. I think she's as crazy as you do... 

But because I have had improper heat for so long in addition to the ridiculously cold and windy winter DC has had this year, I now have a from of bronchitis I can neither remember or pronounce, let's just leave it at Bronchitis.  I am on a puffer-- well, I call it a puffer bc I have to take two puffs twice daily.  It's an inhaler in case that's not apparent.  I have also been prescribed Codeine.  Now, this was prescribed in order for me to sleep.  I have been coughing so much lately that I haven't been sleeping much.  This is bad.  This means my body can't heal (as everyone remembers mom/grandma telling them all their lives).   

So I slept this weekend.  But I also discovered that Codeine makes me nauseous. 

Ok. I started this update Monday night.  I didn't finish it before I went to bed and haven't had the chance to get back to it until now.

I called the DC Department of Consumer and Regulatory Affairs and scheduled a home inspection because my landlord has been so uncooperative.... 

You know, I didn't have a problem with her until she turned down my fabulous proposal to discount my rent for March due to the fact that I haven't had heat FOR SURE the first two weeks of February and most likely since before I even moved in.  She turned me down.  She's also avoided a number of my emails, disregarded my NEED for a space heater, and informed me that I have always had heat (as you've read above).  It took her THREE MONTHS, that's right three months, to fix my smoke detector (it's wired to my apartment and even tho I've changed the battery has continued to beep).  I emailed her multiple times and told her it was still beeping each time I spoke to her. Like WTF lady?!? Seriously that's annoying and technically a fire hazard. 

Anyways, I scheduled the inspector for Tuesday.  She came.  Ms. Booth didn't even have to take her coat off before she noted that I don't have adequate heat! And my landlord has "fixed" the problem! I bet they got ripped off by some sketchy electrician, but NOT MY PROBLEM.   Here's what else she is citing my landlord for:

- lack of a fire extinguisher

- lack of screens on all of my windows

- my dryer vents into the apartment (according to DC Code, this is a fire hazard) . I asked about it because it leaves water streaks on the walls closest to the dryer and I know that that kind of constant moisture is perfect for mold and mildew to grow and this can cause severe bronchial issues.  Note that I am currently trying to get over Bronchitis...

- Ms. Booth also thinks that the windows in my bedroom are not big enough for egress in case of fire/emergency.  

-  Last but not least, is the fact that Ms. Booth doesn't think that my landlords are even certified/licensed to RENT. 

I'm not sure what kind of fines my landlord is going to be looking at but I do know that just for the HEAT she's looking at up to $1000!!! Just for the heat people.  Oh, I can't wait to find out what happens... I, of course, get a copy of everything my landlord receives from the DC government.

Something else that is not sitting well with me is that my landlord emailed me yesterday asking me to make my rent check out to someone else.  This new person is not who my lease says to make my rent out to every month.  Now, if that's not suspicious, I'm not sure what is.  The only reason my landlord would have to get rid of me is lack of payment and that would present them with that exact opportunity-- I make the check out to someone else and they claim I didn't pay my rent.  A check made out to a different person is not rent... Not happening.  Nope.  

She can treat me like I'm dumb, like I'm a little kid.  But, I'm sorry, I'm not a little kid and I'm definitely not stupid.  So, lady, I tried.  I even offered you a way out.  She's not willing to accept or even work with me.  

Now? Ha!  Now  I play hardball...

Last but not least, I'm looking for a new place to live just in case..

Honey, it's cold outside...

So I've found out what is wrong with my electric bill. I'm essentially paying to heat the entire home. I'm sorry, I didn't sign up for that. Let me break it down.

The furnace in my apartment is hooked up to my electric meter. Ok, fine, that makes sense. Because it is a heat pump, there is a fan out back. Just one fan. According to several HVAC guys I spoke with, one outside unit means there is only one furnace/heat pump for the ENTIRE house. This make sense.

What does not make sense is that my apartment is never really warm. I know I'm a habitually cold person, and I know that basements are cooler than the rest of the house- that's just a fact. But there is no reason why if I set my thermostat to 70 degrees, why my small one bedroom apartment does NOT get warm. I am in sweats all the time, not for comfort but for warmth.

It gets better.

Last week was probably the coldest week all winter here in DC. There were two consecutive days where the temperature high did not break 20 degrees during the day. Think of how cold this is at night. The first night, I was so cold, I slept with 4 hand warmers. It was the only way I could get warm enough to even fall asleep. The next night, Dave came down and spent the night with me. Understandably, he doubted it was really that cold in my place, but boy was he proven wrong. There is a breeze coming through my bedroom windows. A very cold breeze. There is also no heat blowing out of my two vents. This disturbed me no end. Now, at this point you're probably wondering, why didn't I just turn up the heat? Forget the electric bill, I'm cold! Well, I did. I had that thermostat turned up to 80 degrees!! My apartment stayed cold enough that the cup of ice water I had before I fell asleep still had some ice in it when I woke up.

I emailed my landlord because of course she wasn't answering the phone.

They've been in ITALY all week. That explains everything and then some.

While I'm paying to heat their entire home, the thermostat in their portion is the main thermostat. What this means is, when they set it for a particular temperature once the heat pump hits that temperature, it goes off REGARDLESS of what my thermostat is set to. So, if they were out of the country last week, then they set their thermostat very low if not off. Hence me not having heat. It was just my luck that it was so cold while they were gone.

I called the DC government re: landlord and tenant issues. I have a home inspection coming up this week. It's possible that my landlords will be faced with a $1000 fine. When the DC worker informed me of that, I simply told her that at this point, that's really not my problem. These are issues you have to worry about as a landlord. If it had been done properly from the get go, they wouldn't have to worry about such a big fine.

My landlord's response to my email about not having heat last week: "Are you sure you're not running the AC? Let me know what time is best for you and I will come down and look at it after we get back from Italy."

I am at a loss for words. The fact that they have been so uncooperative with me while I fight with Pepco about my electric bill, haven't fixed the beeping smoke detector in my apartment (it's wired to the house, I've replaced the battery multiple times in case you were wondering) even though I've told her EVERY time we've spoken face to face, simply makes me angry. I'm determined to have them refund the money I have paid to Pepco to heat their house and to have them take over my account (since essentially, it's theirs) AND to fix the issues with the heating in my apartment. But to treat me like I'm stupid?! That's completely uncalled for. I've been unable to decide if they were really just clueless or, as a coworker recently put it, conveniently clueless. But that one email made my decision. They're not clueless. They like that I pay for the electric and if I complain about it then they have to do something about it. If they act like they didn't know or I'm the one in the wrong, then they'll have more leeway with me. Well, I'm sorry. That kind of shit just doesn't fly with me.

Otherwise I like the place. Funny how that happens.

I'm staying with Dave until this all gets figured out. But I turned off the heat. My meter isn't running like a turntable anymore. You don't know how much satisfaction that gives me at this point. Plus, I have a nice space heater coming this week. That means that the heat pump will remain off for the rest of the winter. UNLESS they take over my electric bill. Ha!

January 20, 2009

It was cold, so cold.

It was busy, so busy.

And public transportation was restricted from the entire portion of the event and then some (including the security parameter).

But it was good.

It was Tuesday, January 20, 2009. The day President Barack Hussein Obama was inaugurated as the 44th president of the United States.

It was real. It was inspiring.

Dave and I braved the freezing weather and the (literally) millions of people to see what we could see of the Inauguration ceremony and the parade. We walked, and walked, and walked, and walked. Did I mention that we walked? All over the city. From 2nd street and Constitution Avenue to 19th and H streets. We walked around the White House. We tried to see through the fencing, hoping, just hoping to catch a glimpse of the man that has lifted the spirits and hopes of so many people throughout America, to catch a glimpse of he who has promised so much and so many people are relying on to bring change to the United States. I snapped a picture of his limo as it drove by surrounded by Secret Service on foot, in SUVs, and hanging on to the outside of the SUVs. The closest we were able to get to actually seeing President Obama was a little TV in a shop window somewhere between Chinatown and Metro Center (parts of DC).

On November 4, 2008, my vote meant something. I'd moved from one state where Republicans held the majority to another state in the same situation. But on that day, MY VOTE helped change Virginia to BLUE for the first time in a long time. Oh it was so amazing. I had chills watching the states be, one after another, declared for Barack Obama. What a night.

We're living in history. I have to admit I didn't support him at first. So little experience, such a big voice. I had my hopes set on Hillary. The first female president? For myself, a feminist at heart, that would have been the ultimate achievement. So I was weary of him. What did he know? He hadn't been involved in politics for that long, considering. But he could speak. And people were listening. Listening hard. and so I started to pay closer attention.

Dave supported his campaign, giving a little here and there. When he asked me to write him a paragraph about what this inauguration meant to him, I just said ok. This is what I came up with. While the details are for Dave, they're the same for me. As a minority on several different counts, this election has meant so much to me. As a woman, as a hispanic woman, as a diabetic hispanic woman I have hope for the future. With someone like Obama leading us, with the idea that government is for the people and that WE ARE ONE, how could we not look up for the better?

Here's Dave's paragraph:

Hope. Change. New Beginnings. An end to terror. These are all words and expressions that this Inauguration mean to me. My name is David Ermer and I am a supporter of Barack Obama. The past eight years have been especially difficult for me to continue to stand behind my country. I am a Veteran of the United States Air Force and have been proud to be a part of the Armed Forces, proud to be an American. Watching how the terror on Americans has been handled has not only disappointed me, but saddened me. Poor management has brought our country to a recession and I have been unemployed for the last six months, waking up every day to continue to search for a job, hoping my savings will stretch just one more month because today might be my lucky day. But January 20th, 2009. That will be my lucky day, as a man, as an American. Because that is the day that Barack Obama is to be Inaugurated as the 44th President of our strong, hard-working country. That is the day hope and change become reality.

While I'm not what I would define as a faithful or religious person, the past few months have given me hope. I know the economy is in a recession, one of the worst in the recent past. I know that times will be hard for a long time coming. But he's already started to make changes.

Take yesterday, his first official day in office. He froze the high salaries of government workers in his cabinet. What a way to start, what an example. If everyone else is tightening their belts, well, so should Washington!




It's about damn time.

A New Year

Originally, I was going to type about a quote from the movie Rocky that I saw on a friend's blog yesterday that had me thinking about the things life throws at you and how you deal with them. Then I was going to type about my issues with my electric company that I've, hopefully, resolved.

But the day was too nice and it's a new year and a time for new beginnings.

I follow a blog and the author wrote about New Year's Resolutions not too long ago. Her ruminations made me think. Not about what my resolutions were but more about what I was ready to change in my life and the fact that I wanted to change things not because of the passing of the first day of January 2009, but more because it is going on the third year that I've been out of school.

Today was a good day.

It's sad for me to admit this, but it's been a really long time since I've had a really good day like today. I'm working to change that. Because, really, isn't your perspective on life all about your own personal attitude and how you roll with the punches??

So let me tell you about my good day.

It started yesterday. To make a crappy day even worse, I got my electric bill. Now, I live in downtown D.C. My address ends with Washington, DC and my zip code. I live in a little basement apartment that appeared, at first, to be a steal. I pay only a little bit more than I was paying to live in a teeny-tiny efficiency apartment way out in Virginia and to top it off I have my own washer and dryer. So the apartment has it's own little deficiencies... so what? They're not something I simply cannot live with. I have to run a dehumidifier almost constantly when it's even a little bit warm because of the humidity and there's this little black box taking up space in my living room (that's right, I have a living room!) that I'm not allowed to move. Don't know if you know what it is, but this SuckPump (spelling?) is required to be there due to flooding issues. Fine. My apartment doesn't heat well. Ok. I have plenty of blankets and a good pair of sweats so being a little chilly isn't bad (I'm not freezing people, I'll guess my apartment stays in the 60s). Fine. But when I get an electric bill for close to $300 for a month that I was out of town for two weeks in?? THEN I have a problem. I wouldn't have moved if I knew I would be responsible for utilities that ran that high!! Because, all things aside, I don't make enough to pay that much a month.

I'm a big girl. I've faught for what I believe in all my life. I can also turn on the charm when necessary. Last night I couldn't get anyone on the customer service line to tell me what I could do about my bill, if I could have the meter read again or what. I seriously thought I would be stuck with this huge bill that I'm not prepared to pay (it's one thing to be faced with something like that that you've been expecting and saving for and another to have it thrown at you after you spent a portion of your savings on the holidays). I was really stressing it. I called Dave and told him. Now this frustrates me. The man has a three floor townhome in a suburb of DC and he doesn't even pay $200 for his electric. THEN WHY IN THE HELL AM I SUPPOSED TO PAY $300 FOR A ONE BEDROOM APARTMENT?!?! Whatever. He came over because he could tell I was really stressing this. It was nice for him to just be there, ya know?

Whew. Too much background information- I do that, sorry.

Now for today!

I get on the phone with my electric company. I find out that a specific meter is connected to my account. Duh. My issue is how does the company know that that specific meter is the one for the basement?! The lady didn't understand what I was asking and I gave up. I was transfered to billing. The lady there explained that they can put me on an average plan where they take the average cost that I have rung up for the past 12 months. Well, I've only been there 3 and each month has been significantly higher than the last so that won't help me. Yes, actually it will. They take the average of the last12 months whether I've been there or not. I am then responsible for that amount until they reevaluate it. That grand total comes to about $100 more or less. HOLY CRAP. Big difference. Relief. Sort of. I'm still responsible for this month's bill. "You can dispute that, sweetie." HOW? Then this lovely woman transfered me back to general customer service. SCHEDULE AN ADDITIONAL READING and then call back to ensure that the dispute is registered. The lovely gentleman I was transfered to said it looked like an obvious MISREADING. AGHHHH!!! ARE YOU SERIOUS?! So I did that. I'm calling back on the 16th. Done. Weight off my shoulders.

It was a pretty chill day at work. I've noticed the department head keeps giving me work, so that's a good thing. She likes me. Always good to have the department head like you and the work you do.

And the final touch on such a good day.

The lady from MiniMed Insulin Pumps called. I have been approved to received a new insulin pump (if you're lost here, please refer to my previous posting). My insurance company is covering 90% of the cost of the pump and all supplies!!! This leaves me responsible for $406.75 Wait, wait. I'm really stressed out about my $300 electric bill but I'm excited for this?? Hold on, I'm not done. If I send them my old pump within 30 days of receipt of theirs, they will credit $500 towards my out-of-pocket costs. HAHAHA!!! That leaves me with a CREDIT of close to $100!!! Done. Just waiting for my doctor to sign the prescription then it gets shipped!


I could dance in a circle right now. I really could.

And, it's decided. I'm going back to school. My LSAT test prep-course starts in April finishing in time for me to take the June exam and start applying to law schools in the Fall for a start date of September 2010.


And tomorrow is Friday!

Love,
Carmen

My techie self...

I'm an insulin dependent diabetic. I'm also fortunate enough to be on an insulin pump instead of multiple injections per day. For those of you that aren't familiar with an insulin pump, it's a device that is attached to me 24/7/365. While this is, at times, uncomfortable and annoying, it is so much better than shots. I don't have to worry about carrying around needles or giving myself shots in public places while people watch and stare. I just have a device attached to me that looks kind of like a beeper with a wire coming out of it. It's even been mistaken as a new kind of iPod. And it's done wonders for my diabetes control.

I'm telling you all of this information because today I took the first steps to obtain a new pump. This is huge. Insulin pumps are not cheap. Many models range from $2,000 to $5,500. This does not account for the monthly supplies and batteries that accompany pump use. It's expensive. My insurance company covered my first pump and I was responsible for a small percentage of the price for my current pump. Moving forward on getting a new pump is kind of stressful. The pump rep. has to get into contact with my insurance company and my doctor and, depending on my control of my diabetes, the insurance company has the right to pay for the entire pump or part of it or none of it. If my insurance decides they won't pay for any portion of my new pump, I'm outta luck. If they cover a portion, I think I'll be ok. But I'm hoping that they cover it all. I'll keep you updated.

I'm sure you're wondering why I don't want to continue with my current pump. It's simple, really. The current pump I'm on has not only given me a number of problems (not user error related) to the extent that it has had to be replaced on multiple occasions, but it is no longer covered under warranty. But that's not that bad is it? You wouldn't think so, but if the pump is no longer covered under the warranty, the company will not replace it if it stops working for any reason. The rep. told me that I could pay them $500 to extend the warranty for 1 (get that ONE) month. I'm sorry, but that's a lot of money that I can't really hustle up that quickly for that short of a period. What if I pay that and the pump is fine for a month but then dies the next month? Exactly. I'm not throwing away that kind of money every month- I can't afford to! So I asked her what my other options were. She said that I can continue to use the pump and if and when something happens to it, pay the $500 so that the company will replace it. At that point, I can then upgrade to their latest model and the $500 I gave them to extend the warranty will be applied towards whatever my insurance company doesn't cover. Ok. So that's what I've been doing. I'm on an essentially expired insulin pump, praying nothing happens to it.

How stressful is that? I am completely and utterly dependent on this little piece of technology. It's lovely, really. Battery operated (not some funky weird battery, it takes double A's!) and it's water resistant/proof.

But I can tell it's on it's last legs. The clock is getting slower and slower and the alarms sound worse and worse. It just sounds like it's dieing. Since I had such a horrible experience with this particular pump company the first year I was on it, I am looking at other pumps. I'm refraining from mentioning this company because I don't want to bias or offend anyone that might come across my blog that either loves it or works for them.

I'm looking at the MiniMed Paradigm pump. This nifty little item has more advance features, offering better control of my diabetes and can also be used to with a Continuous Glucose Monitoring system. The pump syncs with a monitor and then responds appropriately with more or less insulin or related alarms. I find this incredibly cool. Not only can I do what I've been doing with my current pump, but this new pump will display a graph of my blood sugar trends for me whenever I please right on it's little display screen! How cool is that?! Not to mention how helpful it will be with my control.

I don't mean to get all techie on you, but this will offer me more options for a better lifestyle.

In the process of obtaining this new pump, I have to answer a lot of questions pertaining to my medical history. Here are a few examples:

What's your date of birth? June 7, 1984.

What type of diabetes do you have? Are you type I or type II? I'm type 1- insulin dependent.

What year were you diagnosed? March of 1986 (they usually come back with "Wow. How old are you again? So, you've never known life without diabetes.")

How long have you been on insulin? (I find this question kind of pointless since I've already explained to the nurse that I'm an insulin dependent diabetic - I can't live without insulin) Since diagnoses- 1986.

How many injections do you take per day? None, I'm already a pump user.

Keep your fingers crossed and I'll keep you posted.

love,
Carmen

Catch-up

The remainder of my week at home was good. I'll have to post the pictures of my step-dad's Avalanche truck getting stuck leaving my grandma's house Christmas night! Oh fun times in Utah weather.

I came back to DC on Sunday, Dec. 29 to almost 60 degree weather. What a change! Dave picked me up at the airport and we did our gift exchange that night. Dinner with his mom and her boyfriend was nice and relaxing. Betzy actually got me two suits! One is grey and the other is black. Very nice. Dave got me a robe (perfect length!) and slippers because I'm always cold and a necklace I've been admiring for some time now. I got him a new Fossil watch. It's so nice, he doesn't want to wear it!! "I don't want to mess it up!" Guess I'll have to work on him...

I dog-sat Monday and Tuesday nights and then it was New Year's Eve.

Dave had gotten us tickets to the Downtown Countdown here in DC at the Grand Hyatt hotel. The food was good, the drinks were better and we enjoyed the different things they had going on all night. Bands played (saw Cowboy Mouth live!!), there were comedians, karaoki and a "club" with music and dancing. I appear to have made several phone calls around 11pm- sorry! Haha. Oh dear. We took a cab to Georgetown to hit up the Cheesesteak Factory only to find it closed.. and our cab driving away!! Luckily the pizza place around the corner was open for business and handed over a half pepperoni and half cheese pizza. Don't ask how much I paid- I don't remember.

Cab ride to my place. I made it down my dangerous curvy stairs all on my own only to discover I had lost my cell phone somewhere along the way... :( sad panda!! Dave came to the rescue tho and pulled it from his pocket! Apparently I had left it on the table we had been at when we welcomed in the New Year. The pizza was delicious.

Yesterday we slept late and just took it easy. I'm so happy I didn't have to work yesterday. It was nice to just watch tv for hours and hours. Talk about frying my brain! We pulled a mini- Criminal Minds marathon of three episodes, followed by two episodes of Knight Rider. Yes, I'm a dork. I came to terms with that years ago, people, and completely enjoy it.

Here I am at work today, keeping my fingers crossed that I can make it until the end of the day and the weekend.

On a side note, I hate insurance companies. Hopefully my drama with Blue Cross Blue Shield will be resolved shortly. Ugh.

Hope everyone's New Year's celebrations were fun and that everyone made it home safe and sound!

love,
Carmen