Unsung Heroes

All I did was comment on her pretty black hat... her story came flowing out. She had just made the heart wrenching decision to put her husband of thirty plus years into a care center for Alzheimer's patients . Her granddaughter had been in a car accident and died. She and her Sister were traveling across the country to attend the funeral. I wondered at her poise. In her pretty black, She looked so normal. She didn't look broken or weighed down-- but she was barely standing (figuratively speaking) the weight she had been carrying and the weight of her decision were heavy.

I looked around at the people in my world, both near and far, both intimate friends and aquaintances, both past and present... and was simple amazed at the number of people that are the primary care giver:

handicapped children-- autistic, downs, spinal bifida, ADHD, and many more. Children taking care of ill relatives: the horror of Alzhemiers disease, amputations, PIQ lines... I wondered how many other people look normal, on the outside they look "put together", and in their hearts they are carrying such burdens. Their burdens to them are like putting on your shoes just part of the day.

I find there to be a nobility of character that is often unheralded for people that day in and day out care for people that can not care for themselves in all the varying degrees of disability.

As I listened to the Women in the Black Hat, I wondered what I could possibly do to help her. Nothing. And then suddenly, I found myself hugging this small Jewish Woman in the black hat, a stranger. And telling her that angels would surround her and help her through this difficult time.

Do you remember those bracelets with,"What Would Jesus Do?" printed on them. I think of that saying as I watch people lift up their burden, of care giver. What could I possibly do that could ease their day. Or help them to feel cared for because lets be honest, they are endlessly neglected. Flowers, a meal unsolicited, a card in the mail just to let them know that I was thinking of them. I wrote this little bit of non-sense, because I wanted them to know I was thinking of them. I am moved by their love. I may not know what Jesus would do in this exact situation but I know for sure that He doesn't feel that way about the care-givers, their actions speak volumes. Caregivers may be closer to perfectly loving than they could possibly imagine.

Cloudy Thoughts

I flew into the Dallas/ Fort Worth Airport. It was July, in the middle of one of the worst heat waves of the season. And it was unusually dry... The beautiful rolling hills were parched yellow. The trees all appeared tailored with no stragglers at the base. As we were driving out of town,... I mentally wondered what part of this foreign landscape would seem familiar to me. I wanted the rolling hills to be like those of Watsonville, Steinbeck Mountains-- I always thought they looked like sleeping dragons. But, they weren't those kind. I looked up into the sky. Same blue sky. Thank heaven, that the world round, the sky has been the same to me. The cloud's shape has always been familiar, even though, thanks to my aviation weather training, I know the names of them and why they are formed; my thinking about them doesn't hold the same magic as hearing Lindsey talk about clouds in his technical dream voice. I was looking at the sky flipping through thoughts of different kinds of clouds and what they mean to different people.

The Lord was in the Cloud

"an house shall be built unto the Lord, and a cloud shall rest upon it, which cloud shall be glory of the Lord, which shall fill the house." (Doctrine and Covenants 84:5)

The clouds: a symbol of God

"[Moses] the cloudy pillar descended , and stood at the door... and the Lord talked with Moses.(Exodus 33:9)

The soft fluffy clouds that go unnoticed as we go about our daily duty.

"Then the cloud covered the tent... and the glory of the Lord filled the tabernacle." 40:34)

The threatening dark clouds that thunder and lightning.

"... for they have heard that thou Lord art among this people, that thou art seen face to face, and that thy cloud standeth over them, and that thou goest before them, by day time in a pillar of a cloud..."(Numbers 14:14)

The clouds that linger on the horizon. The clouds that bring rain.

"And it came to pass that when Jesus had toughed them all, there came a cloud and overshadowed the multitude that they could not see Jesus." (3 Nephi 18:38- Book of Mormon: when Jesus came to the American continent).

The sunset that paints all the clouds brilliant shades of the rainbow.

Clouds that bring rain, literally living water.

I am sure that as I have been in life's turmoil and shacking my fists at the Heavens, "Why me? Why this? Why not my way?" That I have not stopped to contemplate what kind of clouds are hovering over head. I am sure that the words to the song, "Sometimes He let's it Rain" have not softened how I feel about the situation. I am sure that as anxious of a parent as I am, that God knows what "chores" what turmoil, what classes in Character that are best for me. I am grateful for gentle showers, for foggy days, for summer thunder and lightening shows and even for the wispy clouds that fan the sky scape and make ripples like waves. I very much like the thought that God is in the clouds. It makes me feel more found and less lost.

What Are You Wearing?

"The Cloth of righteous societies has ever been woven from golden threads of charity-- the spirit of loving and caring for our 'neighbors'.

We yearn for a peaceful world and for prosperous communities. We pray for kind and virtuous societies where wickedness is forsaken and goodness and right prevail.

Should we fail in this great core commandment to "succor the weak, lift up the hands which hang down, and strengthen the feeble knee" (Matt 22: 36- 40) or turn our hearts from those who suffer and mourn... the jubilant hope of our hearts will ever be distant." [H. David Burton]

So, my thought today, is what are you wearing? When I was dressing to day, I had no thought of clothing myself in 'Charity'.

Me personally, my standard: jeans, I bought them five years ago with Laura Bailey on my birthday when I need to find a good pair of jeans, they were $49.99, at the time I used all my money to buy them-- forgoing all the other things I needed. If I had know I'd love them to death, I probably would have bought them in a darker wash. A t-shirt, its nothing special, I grabbed it at Target because it's red, soft, and wrinkle free. I bought it to replace a shirt I ruined. I bought it because everyone should have a go- to polo shirt. I bought it because at the time I only had two shirts that fit me (just after Lucy was born) and it still fits so I still wear it:) My very favorite shoes-- orange and red Merrill's, that I bought two summers ago with my swim lesson money; they were a splurge for me. They are my most expensive purchase-- EVER. And I have worn them everywhere, and I love them. It's silly, they are not stylish and yet they are. They don't go with everything and yet they do. I bought them because sometimes you need something sensible to walk in that has a sense of fun too! I knew that I was going to be walking a lot today so, these are my go- to- shoes. How to do my hair-- we'll probably take pictures because we're celebrating Emily's Birthday, so, I curled my hair and tied it back with a handsome silk scarf from my grandmother, because sometimes just wearing something of her's makes me feel more classy. How much make-up I put on just to look alive and not ill or exhausted. And the true wonder of something as simple as mascara or the eye brow pencil. When I first read that this small little pencil was some woman's makeup miracle-- I laughed out loud, and now I wish I could send her a thank you note.

My golden threads: the little things that I do that collectively make up the fabric of my life. Is it interwoven with brilliant gold that emphasizes my faith? Is Charity as standard as my jeans and t-shirt.

Standing Ovation

Some Mornings after getting all the kids out the door to their various school day things. I enter the quiet house-- wondering if there will be standing ovation for my performance. Then I notice, a child's breakfast dish still on the counter.
Today, I thought, "Maybe someday she'll actually eat breakfast, brush her teeth-- put her dish away, ALL by herself... and then I will miss her, today, it's a warped kind of 'hello mommy'."
Morning routines have always had their challenges but this one little piece of helpful advice has changed my AM completely.
With my boys the morning routine consists of constant reminders to wear clean clothes-- not the ones that they throw on the floor yesterday or any other day before. Clean socks with their shoes, which I have logged away in the recesses of my brain supplanting Anatomy and Physiology knowledge with shoes in the front room under the babies blanket knowledge. Jeans and T-shirts: practically everything matches (even as I am writing this I have images of a sweet ten year old who insists that his favorite camo pants match his favorite green striped shirt: two favorites obviously match and their both green-- I have heard this logic a number of times in favor of the same out fit.) The hardest part of the morning is getting the boys to brush their teeth.
With my girls .... I had no idea so many things didn't match jeans. It has been Drama I, Drama II and then a High Drama at our house all over what to wear or "What Not to Wear?" Then a friend of mine, Laura (an expert on fashion and reasonable teenage girls) gave me the idea of having all the outfits for the week on hangers. Now, its part of our Saturday jobs-- we sit down after bringing the laundry from the laundry room to put away-- and with the lovely hangers, Grandma Bebe bought, with clips on them, we pick out pants or skirt, shirts and or undershirts, belts, and socks, tights or leggings. We talk about which shoes are the best pick, [its winter so luckily most everything go with pink pock-a-dot and cheetah print rain boots] With a weekly reminder that Wednesday is P.E.
Jessica (my niece at college) was here this weekend and helped the girls pick out their outfits. She even convinced one of them if the pants, which are favorites, weren't too dirty and she hung them up after she took them off that she could wear them twice in the same week and NObody would know-- and she wouldn't have to wait for them to come through the laundry. Since it was coming from Jessica, who is the coolest person on the planet, this advice was taken as a magic remedy, instead of how to decrease the amount of laundry that has to be done, her Mother, every day.
But this morning, it was like heaven as the girls happily put on their Wednesday outfit. And showed them to me. No screaming that this isn't going to work for day, or nothing matches, or where are my favorites. Just "How does this look" and I got to "Oh" and "Ah" over the brilliant color palette. The way that shirt shows off her personality. The socks that match the days of the week. And a pat on the back for the hair tie that sets off the outfit perfectly.
Standing ovation, Please!

Band Geeks

Every Morning- Monday thru Friday. In the dark of the morning before the sun comes up, I watch in amazement as twelve, thirteen, and fourteen year olds pile out of parents cars, walk huddled up in thier jackets into the back of the Junior High building some with instruments in hand others unpacking thiers from the band lockers. Voluntarily they come. To do what-- make music. They don't get graded for it. They don't get credit for it... and yet they come. As part of an elete group. They are dedicated to playing; nobody even takes roll. They play Jazz. Some people wonder at the thought of teenagers learning and playing Jazz, but they are hungry for it. It pushes them to new levels, It invited creativity. They laugh at themselves a bit, in the morning before most people their age are even stirring from their beds. And they play: insink out of sink, funk, disharmonies, and then which is the magic of music it becomes beautiful. And so, they lug thier cases home, to practice more, so they can come back again tomorrow and be a part of this wonder of the ages. Twelve, thirteen and fourteen year olds with rumpled hair and unbrushed teeth and smiles.
My own son said, "Thank you for taking me to band every morning. "
"Thanks mom." As he pushes me in the shoulder and gets out of the car into the cold dismal winter morning. He smiles as he cross infront of the car. I am abit tempted to honk the horn and make him jump... but its 6:59 in the morning and even I can't stand the thought of interrupting someones sleep. And so, I wave and tell him to "Take Luck" He responds as if prompted "If you have any care for it." Then his is gone into the world of Junior High with the one bright spot being that he is surrounded by good music and people just like him for a brief moment, Band Geeks.

Summer Rules

1. Tuesday- Thursday- Saturday

Mandatory Complete BODY Wash

With Soap and Shampoo, conditioner optional

Question: Does Shampoo count as a soap if you slather your head then your body in it?
Answer: It does smell like coconut, which is better then you were before. Ok for every day but Sunday (which includes Saturday Night).

Addendum: If you are younger than your mother, your mother can add "SHOWER" as a personal responsibiltiy for any day (in addition to the above suggestions).
* manditory for completion before firends come over.

2. Clothes

You may wear your same shirt and pants all day long and yes, even to bed, if you so desire (although you all own pajamas) But come morning mandatory change of clothing which includes new pants and shirt, underwear etc.

Amendment-- if by chance you own two of the same shirt/ pants your may not wear them in consecutive days, so that it appears as though you are wearing the same outfit you wore yesterday and to bed.

Question: If we run through the sprinklers (Added by a Brother) or go swimming, in our clothes could we wear them again-- Theoritically they got washed, they got dried, and you didn't even have to fold them.

Answer: Do they still smell like... you after playing all day, sleeping in them and then swimming in them? Then the answer is NO! you may not count that as another wearing opportunity.

Addendum: On good principle, you may not take off your clothes that have been worn all day and night, but them in the dirty clothes basket, skip a day and then wear them again-- That is Cheating!

3. Homeless

At least one other day besides Sunday you must NOT appear to be Homeless. The day is at your general discretion.

Persons with a home would have all these things done on the same day at least for a moment at the same time:

Hair combed, teeth brushed, face washed and clean clothes on.

Addendum: At breakfast Mom may announce that today is not a Homeless Looking day. Complaints will cost you a minimum of 25 cents or an extra job (if you are out of money).

Summer is About...(dot, dot, dot-- it's important)

Summer is about,
Otter Pop Wrappers
on the floor--
And discovering that no matter how many times you sweep in a day,
There will still be wet little pigs that walk across the floor
and drop off their grass clipping hitch-hikers
And even though the floor was just mopped
those are dirty toe smudges
tip- toeing across the floor.
If that child had wings they would have flown through the house,
with their Muddy feet never leaving a trace
But as conscientious as a child
raised up on Ballerina point to keep the impact at a minimum

Summer is about,
Otter Pop Wrappers
In the bed,
where a cross child lift the chamotion of friends, foe, and family
to snuggle into mom's side of the bed
to take a break, slurping on the end of a plastic wrapper
with festive colored sugar water
which some how rights wrongs and heals ouwies.
There are only a few bright drops on the coverlet
yes, a bit leftover on the pillow.

Summer is about,
Otter Pop Wrappers,
A whole collection of them
Lined up expertly in the hidden recesses of the couch
It might be the only thing holding the couch together
Three friends play rock band,
Four girls make a princess castle
that looks a lot like a bandits hide out,
subsequently, being attacked by a rival band
with many screams of delight and horror
from all sides
Two girls riding side saddle,
no, wild west style-- with a somersault dismount
with otter pops dangling from their lips
as the arms of the couch whine with effort.
Giddy Up!
One Dad watching the channels buzz by,
No, those were the Snickers wrappers not the Otter Pops

Summer Is About,
Otter Pop Wrappers
A green smile from lack of oral hygiene
A purple smile because there were only six left
A red smile because it's a favorite
A Blue smile in the family photo OP
A pink smile, in answer from the brilliant child who know how to hide the signs of an Otter Pop addiction
Sticky, Sweet that is impossible to wipe off your hands
It's the smell of supper delight, covered in Otter Pop
It's a kiss, Thanks Mom, with a side of Otter Pop
It's the Hug that leaves a little behind, on your shirt that No One told you
It's bright eyes and smiles in all the colors of the (Otter Pop) Rainbow.