I'm very excited to have a chance to be domestic.
One of the things that I definitely did miss about home was having a space that I could really make my own. I've lived in rooms a shorter amount of time than my Ghana dorm, and still made them "mine" but there simply wasn't the same kind of resources for it in Ghana. You know, it's impossible to put nails in a concrete wall, no matter how hard you try. (Though there were a few nails, so I didn't really understand that...)
I'm looking for apartments now, and tomorrow Stephanie and I are going to view a few. I'm really hoping for a kind of "apartment-in-an-old-house" situation, but I don't know if there are any available now. Some of the ones I've seen have been both expensive and far away, and some of my favorites were rented already. Another one seems to have a slightly odd landlord. I'm really just excited to have my OWN kitchen, my OWN bathroom, and (maybe) my own room. I am really ready to have a place where I can put things on the wall my way, you know... carpets, whatever. I have all these fancy African wood carvings that need a place to live! I really am pleased with the decorative things I bought from Ghana... I just wish I'd gotten more! But I keep telling myself "oh, you'll be back, you'll be back". But that frightens me a little... I mean, just the concept of what I did. I went to another country, lived there, made friends, for only four months. Four months. That's practically no time at all!! And they're at least 1,700 dollars away from me if I ever want to go visit them. I feel as though the finality of this semester really has not settled in yet. I mean... I might *really* never see Efosa or Nas again, or all the other boys that I loved so much.
I was thinking about living in Ghana, and I realized that I could never do it. I need a job, I need to be seriously active, functioning research systems, libraries, book stores... And it really hit me really hard, you know. I can't ever live there. I can't ever hold the kind of life that I want to have in Ghana, which means that any time I ever go there, there will be a sense of finality, of not being able to finish the things I start because they can't really ever go very far. But I love Ghana. I love the way that people talk, the way that I can talk to them, selfishly--I love the way that I stand out and that people are actually interested in me. I love effective public transport. I hate the traffic, but I love that (eventually) I can get anywhere from here to there. I love to talk to people, because I can be expressive, physical in the way that I speak. I love the accents, even though I can't understand them half the time. I hate it when the taxis honk at me, but ah well.
And it really just slapped me in the face that I can't have both. I can have my work, my life, my academics--or I can have Ghana. Keeping in contact gives me that little bud of "Yay!" but sometimes it feels futile. Because really, in a few months, when it really sinks in that I'm not in Ghana, what am I going to have to say?
Well I'm pretty excited about my new apartment, at least. I might even splurge and get a double bed! I doubt it, but even still, lol.
I'm looking for apartments now, and tomorrow Stephanie and I are going to view a few. I'm really hoping for a kind of "apartment-in-an-old-house" situation, but I don't know if there are any available now. Some of the ones I've seen have been both expensive and far away, and some of my favorites were rented already. Another one seems to have a slightly odd landlord. I'm really just excited to have my OWN kitchen, my OWN bathroom, and (maybe) my own room. I am really ready to have a place where I can put things on the wall my way, you know... carpets, whatever. I have all these fancy African wood carvings that need a place to live! I really am pleased with the decorative things I bought from Ghana... I just wish I'd gotten more! But I keep telling myself "oh, you'll be back, you'll be back". But that frightens me a little... I mean, just the concept of what I did. I went to another country, lived there, made friends, for only four months. Four months. That's practically no time at all!! And they're at least 1,700 dollars away from me if I ever want to go visit them. I feel as though the finality of this semester really has not settled in yet. I mean... I might *really* never see Efosa or Nas again, or all the other boys that I loved so much.
I was thinking about living in Ghana, and I realized that I could never do it. I need a job, I need to be seriously active, functioning research systems, libraries, book stores... And it really hit me really hard, you know. I can't ever live there. I can't ever hold the kind of life that I want to have in Ghana, which means that any time I ever go there, there will be a sense of finality, of not being able to finish the things I start because they can't really ever go very far. But I love Ghana. I love the way that people talk, the way that I can talk to them, selfishly--I love the way that I stand out and that people are actually interested in me. I love effective public transport. I hate the traffic, but I love that (eventually) I can get anywhere from here to there. I love to talk to people, because I can be expressive, physical in the way that I speak. I love the accents, even though I can't understand them half the time. I hate it when the taxis honk at me, but ah well.
And it really just slapped me in the face that I can't have both. I can have my work, my life, my academics--or I can have Ghana. Keeping in contact gives me that little bud of "Yay!" but sometimes it feels futile. Because really, in a few months, when it really sinks in that I'm not in Ghana, what am I going to have to say?
Well I'm pretty excited about my new apartment, at least. I might even splurge and get a double bed! I doubt it, but even still, lol.
