Honourable Mention
From The Register, a tale of someone putting a rocket up his own arse. They don't give too many details of the results, but blowing off your family jewels would certainly qualify for a Darwin Award.

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Darwinism in its rawest form

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(D) Warning Signs are there for a reason
From the BBC

Three visitors to a famed US national park are presumed dead after being swept over a 317ft (96m) waterfall.

Witnesses at Yosemite National Park in California said the trio had ignored warning signs and climbed over a metal barricade to pose for photographs.

The bodies of Hormiz David, 22, Ramina Badal, 21, and Ninos Yacoub, 27, have not been recovered.

Other visitors at Vernal Fall had shouted at them to get out of the raging water, a park official said.

The three had been on a day trip to the park in the south-east of the state on Tuesday.

After crossing a metal rail, the group were seen entering the water about 25ft above the fall.

"Several people urged the group member to step back from the river, since it was flowing swiftly and extremely cold," park spokesman Scott Gediman told the BBC by e-mail.

Park rangers were continuing the search on Wednesday, primarily by combing the riverbanks.

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Going Underground.
I guess at least with this method they only need put up a headstone...

http://www.bbc.co.uk/news/world-europe-13623938

A Russian man has died after persuading a friend to bury him alive for a night, hoping it would bring him "good luck".

The victim dug a hole in a garden in the eastern city of Blagoveshchensk and climbed into an improvised coffin, with holes for air pipes, taking a mobile phone and a bottle of water with him.

His friend covered the coffin with earth and then left, after the buried man phoned to say he was fine.

The next morning, he returned to find his friend dead, investigators said.

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When planking goes pear-shaped
This community has been awfully quiet of late so what more timely tale to revive it than this one:

http://www.heraldsun.com.au/news/national/how-brisbane-planking-death-of-acton-beale-is-fueling-a-dangerous-web-craze/story-e6frf7l6-1226056501630

It doesn't take much intelligence to plank, but it demonstrates a blatant lack of intelligence doing what this bloke did. My heart goes out to his loved ones, but he did bring it on himself.

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Darwinism at work....
NEWS ALERT: Coast Guard searches for man swept out to sea in Northern Calif. while taking pics of tsunami

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Uncle Chuckie's getting lazy. This should've been a sure removal.

Man playing real life "Frogger" hit by SUV.

Current Mood: working

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A 2010 Candidate!
Police: Big rig driver dies after intentionally crashing truck to collect insurance

by khou.com staff

kvue.com

Posted on July 6, 2010 at 9:00 AM

HOUSTON—One man may have accidentally caused his own death after he intentionally crashed his vehicle on the Highway 59 N feeder road early Tuesday, according to police.

Police responded to a fatal accident call on the Eastex Freeway at Calvalcade around 2 a.m. They arrived to find one man lying dead on the feeder road. Police said the witness on the scene was a friend who was traveling behind the victim, and he told them a story they found hard to believe.

The witness said he was traveling behind his friend, when for some unknown reason, his friend fell out of the big rig.

Police said the victim’s wounds were not consistent with the story and they called Homicide to further investigate.

After interviewing the witness again, Homicide detectives said a more accurate story began to unfold.

Police said the man intentionally wrecked his big rig in an effort to collect money from his insurance company. They said his plan was to crash his truck into a pillar, and jump out before the impact.

Instead, the victim banged his head on the concrete when he jumped out of the moving vehicle and died.

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Retarded rodent-raping Russian reprobate receives rod-rending retribution from riled raccoon
http://www.austriantimes.at/index.php?id=10795

While out on the piss with his mates, this dickhead thought he might impale an innocent raccoon with his pork sword. Obviously the raccoon left his pepper spray at home.

Current Mood: amused

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Don't sleep in a wheelie bin!
http://news.bbc.co.uk/1/hi/england/8149151.stm

A man who is thought to have climbed into a bin before being crushed to death in a dust cart has been identified...

So even if it's raining and you've had one too many, keep out of the wheelie bins in case it's collection day tomorrow.

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WEST PALM BEACH, Fla. (AP) - Authorities say a West Palm Beach teen accidentally shot himself while talking on the phone.

Investigators believe the 16-year-old boy, whose name has not been released, was home alone Tuesday night. It appears the teen was talking on the phone and playing with a handgun when it went off.

He was found dead at the scene.

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EPIC MOTHERFUCKING FAIL.

Current Mood: cynical

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Fatal Road Rage
http://www.dailymail.co.uk/news/article-1059512/Road-rage-woman-burned-death-ramming-rival-motorist-revving-engine-car-went-flames.html

A road rage driver was burned to death after ramming another vehicle and setting her own car on fire by furiously revving her engine, it emerged today.

Serena Sutton-Smith, 54, had deliberately driven into the back of Paula Small's stationary car and then refused to get out of her Vauxhall Nova as she sat with her foot on the accelerator.

Sparks caused when a front tyre disintegrated and the wheel dug into the road, ignited brake fluid in her engine and set the vehicle alight.

The victim was so overcome with anger she refused to get out of her burning car and even threatened a would-be rescuer who tried to persuade her.

Yeah she was probably mentally ill, but that's still some epic darwin in action.

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On Track for Love
http://news.bbc.co.uk/1/hi/world/africa/7629433.stm

"A couple in South Africa who were having sex on a railway track in Mpumalanga Province have been killed by a goods train, police say."

[I even have an appropriate icon...]

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Its true, the Large Hadron Collider does kill people!
Girl in India commits suicide over fear that the world will end.

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Better Luck Next Time...
http://news.bbc.co.uk/1/hi/7598674.stm

At least he tried, although only suffered a broken nose and shoulder. Good effort though, a bit of practice and he'll get it right next time.

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FAIL.
If only all criminals could be this efficient-

Man accidentally kills himself while trying to rob a Grand Prairie home

A 19-year-old man accidentally shot and killed himself Tuesday morning while he was attempting to rob a Grand Prairie home, authorities said.

Cameron Sands, 19, of Fort Worth kicked in the door of the house and then shot himself in the stomach as he pulled a gun out of his pants to shoot the homeowner, Grand Prairie police said. The homeowner was not injured.

After Mr. Sands shot himself, he dropped the gun and ran out of the home. Police found his body around 5:30 a.m. in the driveway of the home in the 2800 block Garden Grove Road, said Lt. John Brimmer, a Grand Prairie police spokesman.

"This is the first that I’ve heard of a robbery suspect killing himself as he is drawing a gun out of his waist band," Lt. Brimmer said. "The criminal evidence points to that. It certainly isn’t common."

The Tarrant County Medical Examiner has ruled the death an accident.

Current Mood: working

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Get the spatula.

Teen killed taking joyride on steamroller
Last updated June 17, 2008 6:08 p.m. PT

BLAINE, Wash. — The Whatcom County sheriff's office says an 18-year-old man who was taking a joyride on a steamroller was killed early Tuesday when the vehicle overturned and pinned him.

Sheriff's Sgt. Larry Flynn says the 18-year-old and two 17-year-old boys had entered a construction site in Blaine and started up some equipment. He says the 18-year-old was driving the steamroller up a dirt pile when it overturned, killing him instantly.

Authorities identified the 18-year-old as Justin Wydur of the Birch Bay area.

Flynn says the case has been referred to the county prosecutor's office, which will determine whether the 17-year-olds will be charged.

"Flat, drunk and stupid is no way to go through life, son." — Miss Stein, on Fark.com

Longer article here. Comment thread over 400. /makes popcorn

And here's his MyWasteOfSpace page. I can't view MySpace at work but given the user handle, I can imagine. And I'm told it doesn't disappoint.

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Good riddance.
Subject: Teen Girls Killed in Wreck After Attempting to Rob Cab Driver by Slashing His Face

LOS ANGELES — Two teenage girls involved in a botched robbery attempt died when the taxi they were in crashed during a high-speed chase after one teen slashed the cab driver's face, Los Angeles police said.

The driver, Javier Hernandez, 40, was treated at a hospital for minor injuries, including cuts to his neck and face, Los Angeles Police Department Sgt. Lee Sands said.

The two 17-year-old girls had flagged down the cab early Tuesday and asked to be taken to a nearby housing project, where one girl said her boyfriend would come and pay the fare, police said.

Instead, a man shoved a handgun through the taxi window and grabbed a GPS system off the dashboard, Officer Jason Lee said. Hernandez sped away and called police after seeing a car chasing him, Lee said.

"One of the females pulled out a box cutter and began cutting the taxi cab driver, and that's what caused him to crash," Officer April Harding said.

Police arrived at the scene as the other car reached the crash site, Lee said. Three occupants from the second car were detained for questioning, he said.

Hector Jasso and Daniel Martinez, both 20, were arrested for investigation of murder because the girls' deaths occurred during the alleged commission of a crime, Lee said. Both were being held without bail. The third occupant of the car was released.

Lee said Jasso was the robbery suspect and boyfriend of one of the girls.

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Oops.... Darwin Missed One
From:

http://www.theregister.co.uk/2008/03/17/belarus_train_squish_escape/

A Belarus woman snoozed her way through a near-death experience in Brest after she ended her birthday with a kip on a railway track.

Svetlana Yurkova had been celebrating her 32nd birthday in the time-honoured fashion when she was overcome with fatigue, and found herself a comfortable place to bed down. "I just lay down on what I thought was the ground," she explained. "It felt very comfortable, but I later found out it was between two rail tracks and an express train went over me during the night. I didn't even hear it."

"The doctors said it was a good job I was so hard asleep," she went on, "otherwise I would have woken up with the sound of the train and got my head knocked off."

Concerned onlookers called the emergency services, quite reasonably convinced Yurkova was dead after the 90mph train ran over her. The lurking figure of Charles Darwin was observed fleeing the scene, cursing extravagantly.

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