Dear paul,

I'm sorry I didn't call you back or go to your book signing but I am crazy. very crazy. it meant a lot to me that you would sign and give me a copy of your book but you won't ever know that because i sabatoge most of my chances to make meaningful connections with others because i am crazy and socially scared shitless. i think you are awesome and it is my loss that we won't be friends. especially now since i accidentally deleted your number on my phone and you will clearly never call me again after how rude i was.

Jenn