Now in glorious monochrome!

The emphasis on argument in defeating oppression is really getting to me. I know that we're not allowed to just rise up and kill the motherfuckers, and that that wouldn't fix anything anyway, but I have never seen someone actually learn anything because of argument that they weren't already inclined to learn anyway.

Like, sometimes people don't know stuff, and they need to be told, but you can't make someone morally receptive when they're not already. What you're really doing with argument is speaking out visibly to satisfy your own conscience, to be a beacon to others who feel similarly but may be too afraid to admit it, and maybe to outwit--which isn't the same as "conferring to come at truth"--an opponent who is spouting off oppressive bullshit.

I'm not saying argument isn't a beautiful and necessary skill, just that I'm tired of it being given prime place. It feels like another extension of oppression culture, where if someone can just argue the right way, they can render my entire lived experience invalid, because see, their words were better. (See also: every argument with acatrash ever. It's okay for them to be spiteful, truth-twisting bullies, because pretty words!)

I can't speak up in public and argue because I get upset. Being calm is a huge privilege. It's not something everyone can do, not even if they work really hard. Arguing well is also a huge privilege, yes, even if you worked at it. When someone tells me I or someone else is not a human being, a pit opens up inside me and I fall into it--even if it's not my group that's being vilified. I can't "argue" through that. I'm too busy not dying. The sense of worthlessness and self-loathing is so complete that all I have left is crying or murder, and neither is a viable option. What happens is that I just stand there dumbfounded, or offer a hearty "fuck you," which of course is "contemptible" and "irrational" and "a poor argument." *laughs*

Why should I have to argue for our humanity, anyway? Yes, I know we have to live in their world and be able to beat them at their own game, but what if we can't? Does that mean we deserve the nasty remarks? The harassment? The bullying? Because that's the inference in our culture's praise of "argument," that if you can't or won't argue, you have it coming.

I know I sound stupid right now. I'm not being stupid, not really. I'm aware that we can't just punch these people (ANOTHER thing not everyone could do anyway, even aside from the legal problems involved). I realize why we must argue. I just get tired of people confusing skilled argument with the right to exist, or skill with rhetoric as a stand-in for accuracy.