Sex sex sex! Ha, made you look!
I finished the 70s lesbian book, and it was pretty awesome and occasionally cringeworthy. In addition to learning that butches are evil destroyers of the sisterhood and male chauvinist pigs, I learned that the first big gay bar raid (in the 50s), which was big enough to get the ACLU defending the arrested people, happened in my district of my hometown -- I know because the name they gave for the town is the name of my district, and my hometown didn't actually incorporate until later in the 50s, so at that point the now-district was its own town. But, gay bar! Infamous gay bar! In my hometown! Isn't that awesome?
Also, I learned that lesbians don't use dildos. No, really:
This idea [about how lesbians use dildos] tickles the fancy of most men who cannot feature women enjoying or being satisfied sexually without a penis. However, the dildo's most prevalent use is by heterosexual women in masturbation. The truth is that the great majority of Lesbians and/or heterosexual women have never seen a dildo. Women who feel the need for inserting a penis substitute in the vagina to fulfill their heterosexual fantasies are more apt to use homemade improvisations, such as a candle, banana, or cucumber. But sometimes, like the glutton who heaps his dinner plate too full, they may overestimate their capacity.
Then a paragraph about there's no nerve endings up in there anyway and you can get off just as well or better without putting anything in your vagina, and then:
In all studies (and there haven't been all that many) about Lesbian sexual practices one unanimous finding has been that the use of penis substitutes is relatively rare. We are sure that most Lesbians have tried something at one time or another, but for continued satisfaction in sex there is nothing like a living, breathing, responding person.
So, remember, girls, only use those dildos to fulfill your heterosexual fantasies! And don't get one that's too big!
(Also also, I learned that Lesbians don't drink as much as you would think because these days the youth are all teetolalers who smoke a lot of marijuana instead. Um. Yeah.)
***
Today on campus there was a sex fair, with booths for safe sex stuff and people dressed up as condoms and a bake sale of penis-shaped cookies. I became aware of this thanks to the editorial in the school paper, which was upset that people would dare talk about sex in public and in an entertaining manner, when sex is a serious and weighty and deeply private matterthat the author is deeply ashamed of. So we shouldn't hand out condoms for free; we should get them anonymously from the RA's door. Um. Clearly some people agreed with the dude, because there was a respectable-sized gathering of angry Christians there too.
My complaint about the sex fair is that I couldn't find the free latex things. They were giving out bags with Plan B information and free stuff. Now, if it were me, I would have filled the bags with a condom, a dental dam (because no one gives out free dental dams, dude), some personal lubricant, and maybe some breath mints or something. Instead, I got: a Plan B pen, a whistle on a stretchy keychain, a flashlight, and some Band-Aids in a little plastic dispenser with a magnet on it. Am I supposed to put a Band-Aid dispenser on the fridge? Will it help my sex life?
Also, I learned that lesbians don't use dildos. No, really:
This idea [about how lesbians use dildos] tickles the fancy of most men who cannot feature women enjoying or being satisfied sexually without a penis. However, the dildo's most prevalent use is by heterosexual women in masturbation. The truth is that the great majority of Lesbians and/or heterosexual women have never seen a dildo. Women who feel the need for inserting a penis substitute in the vagina to fulfill their heterosexual fantasies are more apt to use homemade improvisations, such as a candle, banana, or cucumber. But sometimes, like the glutton who heaps his dinner plate too full, they may overestimate their capacity.
Then a paragraph about there's no nerve endings up in there anyway and you can get off just as well or better without putting anything in your vagina, and then:
In all studies (and there haven't been all that many) about Lesbian sexual practices one unanimous finding has been that the use of penis substitutes is relatively rare. We are sure that most Lesbians have tried something at one time or another, but for continued satisfaction in sex there is nothing like a living, breathing, responding person.
So, remember, girls, only use those dildos to fulfill your heterosexual fantasies! And don't get one that's too big!
(Also also, I learned that Lesbians don't drink as much as you would think because these days the youth are all teetolalers who smoke a lot of marijuana instead. Um. Yeah.)
***
Today on campus there was a sex fair, with booths for safe sex stuff and people dressed up as condoms and a bake sale of penis-shaped cookies. I became aware of this thanks to the editorial in the school paper, which was upset that people would dare talk about sex in public and in an entertaining manner, when sex is a serious and weighty and deeply private matter
My complaint about the sex fair is that I couldn't find the free latex things. They were giving out bags with Plan B information and free stuff. Now, if it were me, I would have filled the bags with a condom, a dental dam (because no one gives out free dental dams, dude), some personal lubricant, and maybe some breath mints or something. Instead, I got: a Plan B pen, a whistle on a stretchy keychain, a flashlight, and some Band-Aids in a little plastic dispenser with a magnet on it. Am I supposed to put a Band-Aid dispenser on the fridge? Will it help my sex life?
