A Much Needed Update

I've been slacking on the blog entries lately. I have been SO busy that I just haven't had time.

In early November, it became clear that we would not have enough money to pay our bills and buy food, let alone provide any kind of Christmas for our kids. So, I started a paper route! It is a lot of work, but when I get paid, it makes it all worth it. I deliver The Daily Herald, The Deseret News, The Salt Lake Tribune, The Wall Street Journal, The New York Times, and The Financial Times. At first, I thought I would NEVER figure it all out, but thankfully over time, I've improved.

The biggest piece of news is that we finally found a good Psychologist. He just does evaluations and testing and is an expert on Autism Spectrum Disorders. Marshall has officially been diagnosed with Asperger's Syndrome. I have thought that's what it was for many years, but I just wasn't sure because sometimes he's so different. The doctor is supposed to send us his report, along with a list of things to help us get control over his behaviors. He is SO difficult lately. He jumps constantly and flaps his hands. He doesn't sleep well, and is too busy to eat. But, when he's in a good mood, it's so nice. He can be so sweet. He loves to talk to anyone and EVERYONE!! He runs off when we go places, because he wants to show someone how he can skip, or tell them what size shoes or clothes he wears. People don't even know he's talking to them, but he just keeps talking anyway. AaaaahhhhHH!!!!! It is embarrassing and frustrating when he lays down on the floor (face down) while I'm waiting in the check-out line at Cabelas. He lives in his imaginary world of super heroes, and is CONSTANTLY putting his coat on with just the hood so it can be his cape. He is ALWAYS fighting bad guys, or playing "pretend Toontown", or "Pretend Ultimate Allianace" (his 2 favorite computer/video games).

Well, that's all the update I have time for now. I'm really tired and need to take a nap so Brian and I can go out tonight. Here are some pictures from Christmas though.

Monster Mash

Marshall has been wanting to buy the song, "Monster Mash". Every once in a while, he starts crying about it. Well, now he can listen to it anytime he wants to! ENJOY our Monster Mash! We had to borrow a friend of Nate's so we'd have enough people.

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Homemade Gifts? I Must Be Crazy!!

I'm not that great at sewing. It takes me forever to do a project. I'm not good at finishing stuff either. For example, I have the material I need to make an Advent Calendar for my family. I got the stuff last Christmas. I made one for my sister Stefanie but I never got mine made. In fact, I'm so bad, I begged my neighbor to do some of the sewing for me. Now I need to get our family's calendar done and then start my next project. My Marshall-man loves his rice heat pack that I made out of one of my old socks. I filled it with brown rice and we microwave it each night for him. He holds it close because he loves the smell of the rice. I've been really wanting to make a nicer looking one for him so I found this darling pattern for only $10. I figured it is worth it because I'm going to make one for Nate too. He gets leg cramps sometimes at night. I also use one on my shoulder. I have bursitis in my shoulder and it's killing me. The hot pack helps a bit. I just hope I can get it done. I think I can make it. One suggestion was that you make a liner for it first so the heat will stay in better. When I was waiting in the insanely long line at Jo-Ann Fabrics on Saturday, the woman behind me suggested I use the type of material you would use to make curtains. That just means I have double the work. BUT, it would really be worth it if it will stay warm longer. This is what I want to make. I doubt mine will look this good, but I'll do my best. It's so cute!!!


I'm also thinking of making Eye Spy jars. Hmm...am I crazy? Yes, I think so. But think of how much more awesome it will be when the kids love them?!

I recently discovered Celtic Thunder.They are AMAZING!! Not only are the guys who sing amazingly talented, but I'm impressed with the "band" too. Oh, and the boy in the first video was only 14 yrs old when he was chosen to sing with this group of EXTREMELY talented men! His voice just recently changed. I just love good music and I'm such a sucker for amazing harmonies!!!

I don't know about you, but I always need a good laugh. The first song is called "Things You Don't Say To Your Wife." The Second one (and let me tell you, it was HARD to choose just 2), is called Short Songs. It's one of my favorites!!

For more of Tim Hawkins, including my all-time favorite video of his, check out his website. Just click his name above (Tim Hawkins).

BUSY!!

I have been too busy to blog lately! I'm so happy to report that soccer is over for now. I also finished up Pack Meeting last night, which was a huge relief. I'm so far over-booked, it's not even funny! Thankfully, my next Pack Meeting should be less involved. HOORAY!!

October is my favorite month! Marshall is so excited that his birthday is coming up on the 24th. I can't believe he's going to be 5 yrs old already!!! When did my boy grow up?! Speaking of boys growing up, Nathan is going to be 11 next month! Woah....

Eye Spy

I get the biggest kick out of the crazy positions my kids sleep in. Marshall completely buried himself up there on his bed, and Nate just can't get comfortable I guess. One morning when I went to wake him up, he was on the floor! Enjoy the pictures!!

This is just as good as Where's Waldo. Where's Marshall??

He sleeps like this almost every night. He doesn't sleep well unless his head is smashed in the corner of his bed.

Who needs a pillow? Not Nathan!

A Hairy Situation

Mr. Nathan is in that interesting stage of boyhood. It's the almost-11-not-quite-a-boy-anymore-but-not-a-teenager-either. As part of his desire to grow, he has decided to grow out his hair...just on the top though. I think he looks cute either way, but right now all his hair does anyway is comb straight forward. Sometimes he asks me to spike the front for him, but it is too long to look good that way now. How do you find a hairstyle for a boy? Do you find a good hair salon and take him there? I certainly don't know about hair and good styles for boys. He doesn't want me to cut it anymore and he doesn't want a buzz anymore either. He's growing up, and his church pants show the evidence!

A Song Parody That Needs Sharing

There is a boy in Nate's Scout Troop who is obsessed, I mean OBSESSED with Taylor Swift. He is 16 now and he thinks he totally has a shot with her. I told him that she had already written a song about him. It's called, "Just Another Picture to Burn." Then I decided that wasn't good enough. So, in honor of Phillip, I stayed up really late one night and wrote this hysterical song about a boy who stalks Taylor Swift. You need to read the words while listening to the song to really get it. It does require a few explanations though. Andy is the boys' Scoutmaster and the troop meets in Andy's yard every Tuesday night. The other thing that you might not know is that Phillip really likes Rugby. That's why I put that in the song. Here ya go..ENJOY. When you are ready to listen to it, just click play on the sidebar music player.

Phillip’s Song- Taylor Belongs to Me

Music by Taylor Swift

Parody by Aprilyn Bucklein

I’m on the phone with my sister, I’m upset.

I’m going off about something Andy said.

He doesn’t get Rugby like I do.

I’m in Andy’s yard; it’s a typical Tuesday night.

I’m listenin’ to Taylor singing in my mind.

She’ll never know my name the way I do.

But she wears short skirts; I wear Scout Shirts.

She’s really famous, but I think I can date her.

Dreaming ‘bout the day when I’ll wake up and find,

That what I’m kissin’ on is a poster on my floor.

If she could see that I’m the one outside her window.

Been here all night long so why can’t she see?

I’m here beggin’ PLEASE!!!

Won’t you notice me?

Walkin’ the streets with you in my daydreams,

I can’t help thinkin’ that you should be with me.

Acing Facebook quizzes thinking to myself,

Hey this is so easy!!

And I’ve got a hundred posters of you on my wall.

I’m back at school I’ll put them in my locker too.

They say it’s hopeless but I won’t hear that.

I won’t give up because I’m not like that.

She wears high heels, I wear hiking boots.

She’s dating college guys. I’m still in high school.

Dreaming ‘bout the day when I’ll wake up and find,

That what I’m kissin’ on is a poster on my floor.

If she could see that I’m the one tapping her window.

Been here for a week, why don’t you see?

Taylor, I’ve got fleas.

It doesn’t bother me

Standin’ by and knockin on your back door.

All this time how could you not know?

Taylor PLEASE, you belong with me!!

Don’t call security!

Oh I remember hiking to your house in the middle of the night.

I’m the one who makes you lock all your doors and turn on lights.

And I know all of your songs, babe you’re always in my dreams.

Think I know where you belong, yeah I know that it’s with me.

Can’t you see that I am climbing through your window?

Been here for a month now, can’t you see?

Taylor, just believe.

I’m super smelly.

Standing here and breaking down your back door.

All this time I still refuse to let you be,

Here without me.

You belong with me.

You belong with me.

I’m getting down on one knee.

You belong to me.

Will you marry me?

Soccer and Why I Am Crazy

Marshall is a soccer playin' boy! Ok. so here is is a stick swinging boy in a soccer uniform! He seems to like soccer, which is nice. The reason why I say I am crazy is because I volunteered to be the Head Coach. Yes, insane isn't it?! Well, I volunteered waaaaay back in June when I signed him up for soccer, but I never heard anything so I figured I was off the hook. The week that games were supposed to begin, I got an email saying that the parents could view the soccer schedule. I kept wondering why the coach hadn't started practice yet, seeing how we had a game in 4 days, but I knew how busy I was, so I figured the coach must be busy too. Imagine my surprise when I signed in to view the team schedule and it said, "Geneva Elementary, Head Coach Aprilyn Bucklein." Oh. My. Gosh! As if my life isn't busy and crazy enough, I had 4 days to coordinate a practice, pick up uniforms and balls, and call all the parents. Oh yeah, AND get shin guards for Marshall. That isn't easy because he's so dang little that they don't quite fit! I managed to get everything ready for our first practice 2 days later. I decided to hold practices in my backyard for now because I didn't have time to arrange anything else. I'm not sure if that's the best option though, because there are too many toys around. Almost all of the boys' stomp rockets have now ended up on our roof, thanks to all the excited kids around. Ah well, it's not like they played with them all that much. Our team has 11 boys, ages 4 and 5, and every single one of them is a new player. I mean, none of them have played before at all. When it's time to kick off the ball, the kids on my team always walk waaaaaaaaaaaaaay back then run up and kick the ball. The hilarious thing is, the ball barely goes a few feet, even with all that extra running. Too funny! The difficult thing is keeping track of whose turn it is to sit out. Marshall does NOT like to sit out. NOT ONE BIT!! I had to have a Dad go on the field and coach the rest of the game several times because he screams and gets so angry when it's his turn to sit out for a bit. Thankfully, Brian was finally able to come to a game on Saturday and he could take care of Marshall for me. Here are some pictures of our 1st game.

I tried so hard to get a picture of Marshall holding his soccer ball in the front yard, but I was running late for the game so I gave up. The boys were having fun laughing at something.

There! I got him to at least look at me! See Nate in his Scout uniform? That's because RIGHT after soccer, we eat sandwiches for dinner in the car while we race to Scouts. Brian meets us there, and takes the van to teach at UVU while Marshall and I stay at Troop Meeting with Nate. That works well for Marshall because he feels like he is part of the troop anyway! I'll have to get some pictures of that soon.

Nate was trying to take pictures for me. He wanted to get one of Marshall holding his ball. Oh well. :)

This one turned out pretty cute, don't ya think? See how HUGE his uniform is on him?? It's the smallest size available...Extra Small. Hmm...maybe he needs an extra, extra, extra small!

We played the Red Dragons at our first game. Those guys really know how to play! Here they are, about to score on us. That team was really good at things like, oh, I don't know...kicking the ball into a goal, following the ball after you kick it..just stuff like that. But our team is SO polite and we have a lot of fun too. Here is what we do best-

Isn't that AWESOME?! Marshall is the one plugging his nose, with his hand up in the air. I have NO IDEA what he was doing. I guess he was just striking a pose....silly guy! So, 4 yr olds playing soccer is quite interesting. Our team doesn't usually score, but we kick off an awful lot! Sometimes the boys on our team even see the ball on the ground. Other times, their hands and fingers are just so fascinating, or they might be busy telling me how they are gonna kick the other guys' butts. Hmm...yeah, well, THAT would require you to actually KICK the ball! The ball comes to our boys and most of the time they don't even notice. It totally cracks me up! Oh well, if they have fun, that's what is important, right?!

The Sleep Doc Update

Inquiring minds want to know what's going on with my Marshall-man. There is so much to write about so I'll have to start with just the sleep doctor visit and then I will write more tomorrow.

Before the end of summer break, (woah, I'm waaaay behind) we went to see Dr. Pfeffer again. She is the BEST Pediatric Sleep Specialist there is

! She has officially diagnosed him with Periodic Limb Movement Disorder, or PLMD. We decided to try the medication Neurontin again, even though we had bad side effects before. I don't remember if he was almost 2 or almost 3 when we tried that medicine before but he got SO out of control angry while on it, that we begged the doctor to let us take him off of it. We decided to give it a shot again because he is older and because he is taking Risperidone, which really help the anger issues. It wasn't quite enough and we

didn't like that our boy was getting more and more agitated and angry. Not to mention, he wasn't sleeping any better. So we went off that medication and tried Mirapex, but we were seeing no results, positive or negative, and we figure why give a kid a drug that doesn't work for him? I am not one to give meds unnecessarily. She did have his Ferritin levels checked. He had to have blood drawn. I hate having to hold my sweet boy down while they jab a needle in his arm!! It about breaks my heart every time! The results came back that his Ferritin levels were low so we started him on an additional iron supplement from the one he already gets in his multivitamin. We are supposed to have his Ferritin levels checked again in about a month from now to see if they are high enough to pull back on the extra iron. Sometimes he sleeps through the night, but mostly he doesn't. Tonight he had a REALLY difficult time settling down for bed. It's probably because Brian was teaching toni

ght and I didn't do his normal bedtime routine. I need to be better about that. I just really wanted to get the dishes done and dinner put away before it got too late. So, where are we on sleep now? We had 2 TERRIBLE nights in a row last week. I am SO VERY grateful that we haven't had a repeat of that because I was so exhausted I don't think I could handle many more nights like that. He was literally THRASHING about in his bed while he was sleeping. We don't know what was going on but he was very upset about something. The first night, I brought him to bed with Brian and I, and was able to get him to calm down and go to sleep next to me, but he kept kicking! Poor Brian ended up on the couch for a few hours of sleep. That was not fun. The next night was worse! The thrashing was mor

e intense, and he was visibly upset about something but we don't know what. I tried to talk to him and he would open his eyes and look at me but then just crash around on his bed again. I finally got him down and put him in bed with me but I still have no idea what was going on with him. Brian and I barely slept at all that night because he kept screaming in his sleep and tossing around. Neither the sleep doc, nor the Pediatrician have any clue as to what was going on or how to prevent it from happening again. Gotta love that response, huh?!

Well, I think that covers the sleep update. Tune in next time to read about the latest adventures in school, soccer, OT, Feeding Therapy, and more doctor visits.

A Life in Balance

My life has been a little unbalanced lately. It would be sort of like this picture. Things that don't need to be taking so much priority in life, slowly were taking over. I was spending FAR too much time playing fun but useless games on Facebook. I was not spending my time on the most important things in life, like playing with my kids, having real conversations with my husband (that did not include details about the game we were playing), studying the scriptures, and having sincere prayer. Lucky for me, Jesus Christ paid the price so people like me, who get way off whack , can repent and change their lives. Isn't that awesome?! I am really grateful that I can realize I was wrong , and change my life around. For now, I have had Brian block the Facebook website altogether until I feel I have more control over myself. Several people on Facebook expressed their disappointment that I will not be on there anymore, and as much as I appreciate knowing that others like me, I know I must stay away. My life needs to be in balance!

I've been listening to a book on Cd called, "No One Can Take Your Place". Here is what the back of the Cd case says about the book:

Have you ever wondered if you're doing what you're supposed to be doing with your life? Maybe you have a testimony of Jesus Christ but aren't quite sure that He will really help you with your problems. Or, like most of us, maybe you have those days when you just don't see how you'll ever measure up.

No One Can Take Your Place is a book that will help you. It will help you catch a glimpse of the power our Father in Heaven wants you to have. It will help you learn how to lay hold upon that power, how to overcome the temptations that stand in the way of your happiness, and how to shine as a leader in the world. It will help you understand who you really are.

"The Lord knows who we are, where we are, and what our mission is, and what we need in order to accomplish that mission," writes Sheri Dew. "Not only has He known us for a long, long time, He has loved us for a long, long time. We are here now because we are supposed to be here now. No one else can have the influence or do the good that we were prepared and foreordained to have and do. No one else can fulfill our individual missions."

True happiness comes from doing what we were meant to do. This book will motivate you to find out what that means for you; it will also inspire you to carry out your unique work on the earth, for truly, no one can take your place!

This book has already begun to inspire me to be and do better. Add that to the wonderful article in the August Ensign , a church magazine put out monthly, with religious instruction, Church News, and inspirational messages for members of The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-Day Saints, and their families. The article was titled, "Just a Game?" and talks about the seriousness of online game addiction. It made me wake up and realize I was addicted and I was wasting the precious time I have been given. I do not want to have to explain to Jesus and Heavenly Father that I wasted the precious time they gave me here on Earth. There are so many more important things I need to be doing.

So, I've started again. I will try to blog every day because it is a journal writing time for me. I have so many pictures I've been needing to share too.

Cough Syrup= No Sleep

I am sick. Sick, sick, sick...of coughing! I got a nasty sinus infection, which in turn aggrevated my asthma so I've been coughing. A lot. I finally went back to my doctor this morning and got a new anti-biotic, Prednisone, and a lovely cough syrup. Ya know..the kind that's supposed to supress the cough and knock you out so you can sleep. HA!! I wish!!!! I even took 5mg of Melatonin and here it is almost 4am and I am awake. Wide awake. I can't even begin to imagine how difficult today is going to be when I can not stay awake. Marshall will not be happy. This is not going to be good.

I think I will just say NO to drugs. And cough syrup with hydrocodone. That stuff is terrible!

BUT, look on the bright side! Now I have time to post to my blog and then I'll study my scriptures! After that, I can read some more in the book, "Inkdeath." It's a good book, but I've had other things occupying my time.

A Fifth Grader

I guess it's better late than never! Nathan started 5th grade a week and a half ago. He is SO excited!! He has the best teacher in the 5th grade. I was relieved to find out Nate got him. I had requested this teacher but he is VERY popular and everyone requests him, so I didn't know for sure if we would get lucky. Thankfully, the Principal of the school is aware of our struggles with Marshall (who was in the Special Ed. Pre-School there). Here are the pictures of my first-born. He's growing up so fast!!

Another Dead End

We have the world's BEST Pediatrician! He is wonderful and he works tirelessly to help us deal with Marshall's behaviors. As wonderful as he is, he is still only a Pediatrician, not an Autism specialist, or a mental health professional. He has officially given up on being able to help Marshall. He knows we need help, but it is beyond what our doctor is capable of doing. We have been referred to an Autism Clinic in Salt Lake City, Utah (about an hour north of here). While I understand the doctor's referral, I am nervous. I have had WAY too many mental health professionals tell me there is nothing wrong with my child. Oh, how I wish they were right!! I wish I didn't have to deal with all the sleepless nights, rage, and sensory issues. But they are real, and my husband and I have to learn how to help him. We have tried EVERYTHING we know how to do. We've read many books, and tried so hard. We are not the experts, but it seems the experts fail us time after time. What will be different this time? Will our insurance even allow us to take Marshall to this clinic? Will they be fooled by our charming little boy too, or will they take the time to get to know him and see what happens when you make him do things that are challenging to him? Will his intelligence fool them into thinking that he doesn't have problems? Will the therapists and doctors there see his fine motor delays and sensory issues? Will we go away frustrated and defeated once again, with all hope of getting any help for this child crushed? Isn't there anyone out there who really understands how broad the Autism Spectrum is and how each child on the Spectrum is different? These are questions I am afraid to ask. It is painful to try again but I know that my boy needs help. He is almost 5 yrs old and my hope is that he will be able to learn how to manage the anger inside of him, as well as the other issues he has, and be able to function better.

I will be calling the Autism clinic tomorrow. Once I get an appointment, we will be starting a special fast. We would like to ask all family and friends who would like to participate, to combine their faith with ours. We need the Lord's help desperately. I will update as soon as I know anything.

Phew!

No surgery for me yet. My finger finally shows signs of bone growth!! Hooray! This is a REALLY expensive injury though. My State-run health "insurance", if you can call it insurance, won't pay for fractures or casting supplies!! Good grief people!!

I've been so busy with Pack Mtg and 2 Cubs day camps that I feel like I'm hardly ever home! I'll make a few slideshows and post pictures soon. There is so much to write but I just need to go to bed now.

Glenn Beck - Current Events & Politics - Video of the Day - July 2, 2009

Glenn Beck - Current Events & Politics - Video of the Day - July 2, 2009

I love the reaction of the people when they find out they agreed with Glenn Beck. Absolutely hillarious!!

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Neglectful Blogger

I do enjoy blogging. I just haven't had much time lately. We've been really busy just hanging in there. Then, as if things weren't crazy enough, I smashed 3 fingers in the garage door last week and broke my ring finger on my right hand. Yes, OUCH!! I must have been distracted or something because I can't exactly recall how it happened. I remember pulling the door down and then my fingers were hurting. I looked at my hand & it was stuck in the 1st fold of the door. I had to push the door back up to get my fingers out. This is my 1st experience with a broken bone. I hope it's my last. The doctor told me not to use my right hand if at all possible, but if I need to use my right hand, I should not move my middle or ring finger. The finger broke all the way through at the tip and the doctor is concerned that if I don't rest it, the bone won't heal & I will have to have a pin placed in the tip to make the nerve endings re-attach properly.

I'm discovering how right handed I am. I can't write at all with my left hand!! I can type though! It's tough to make meals, do dishes, clean house, and fold laundry with one hand. That is why my bedroom is covered in piles of clothes!! At least I got the dishes done! I can still enjoy camping, though it takes a lot longer to get ready to go anywhere when 1 parent (Brian) has to do all the work. Below are pictures from our weekend at Arches National Park. It was alot of fun & the arches are so beautiful!

Click below to see our slideshow.

Arches Slidesow

Random Stuff

Random quotes from recently--

Marshall can be such a sweet boy and so cuddly sometimes. He says the vutest things like, "I just love you too much." He loves to help but can't stay focused very long. Saturday he got so excited to see that I bought him yogurt. He said "Oh, thank-you for buying me that yogurt!" What a sweet kid!!

A few weeks ago, we were at a Boy Scout Troop Meeting. During this meeting, we took a hike to a grocery store that was about 1/2 mile away. When we were getting ready to leave, the Scoutmaster was way behind us. We turned around to see where he was and Marshall yelled, "Run DUDE!"

"Daddy do you know that I love you?" Marshall asked Brian this question yesterday. Brian told him that he always loves Marshall. Then Marshall asked, "Do you even love me when I'm bad?" "Yes Marshall", Brian replied. "I always love you. Even when you do things that are not nice."

At church, Brian told Marshall he could go give his tithing to the bishop. Marshall RAN to the bishop and said, "Here's some money Dude!" Oh, I wish I had been able to see the look on his face!! I'll bet he got a big kick out of that.

The Good, The Bad, and the WHAT THE HECK AM I GONNA DO?

I went to the dentist today because it's been 5 yrs and because I have a problem with my gums. After looking online, I was sure I had Periodontitis, a gum disease. I've been beating myself up about it for a few days now. I knew I should have gone to the dentist earlier but it's so flippin' expensive. I don't have dental insurance and it gets pretty pricey. They did four X-Rays for free but then they needed to do a panoramic x-ray so they could get more details. Well, I found out I'm missing quite a few teeth. They said I don't have any bicuspids. (News to me! I think I vaguely remember having someone mention that.) It's funny to look at the panoramic X-ray and see all the screws in my jaw. (I really DO have a few screws loose!)

The good is that I don't have periodontitis!

The bad is that hat I only have 2 very small cavaties. Not too shabby for 5 yrs without seeing a dentist! Not that I can afford to have them filled but hey, I only have two!

The WHAT THE HECK AM I GONNA DO is that my gums are reeceeding and they don't know why. Lovely. Also, the roots in my teeth are still dissolving. I knew it had started to happen but I didn't realize how serious it was. They said I'm way too young for this kind of thing to be happening. The dentist thinks it is because my bite is off. (Note to Dad- looks like that jaw surgery didn't pay off so well. Sorry about that!) The dentist told me to move my bottom jaw to the left, then the right. I can move it to the left just fine but I can not move it to the right at all. Now my jaw is hurting from trying so hard today (and from having my mouth open so long). They think the other reason this is happening is because of all the orthodontics stuff I had done. The dentist said they probably moved my teeth too fast and too much. GOOD ONE ORTHODONTIST!! I don't recall asking for braces in the first place. Oh well. What's done is done. Now I get to live with it. The dentist said a bite plate could possibly help. It's not possibly gonna happen because that would cost over $400. Yeah, I think I'll just deal with the problems thank-you very much!

Yeah, I'm Still Here

It's just a really busy time. We're spending lots of time outside and I am beat by the time I finally get to bed at night. We're trying to get Marshall's meds figured out to better help him function. He is not a bad boy. He is so full of love for everyone. He just needs to learn to control his emotions.

Medication Mixup

Tuesday evening, I picked up a refill of Marshall's sleep medication, Clonidine. To make an extremely long story short (and since I'm very tired), the medication was NOT Clonidine. Apparently, the Pharmacy Tech filled the bottle with Valium! So instead of getting .2mg of Clonidine, Marshall got 2 mg of Valium. Needless to say, it has not been a good few days in the Bucklein home. Marshall had to go to the ER Tuesday night and they gave him Benadryl and Clonidine to help him go to sleep. He finally did go to sleep around 1:30am and was COMPLETELY out when they got home around 3am. He was not in control of his muscles anymore thanks to Valium! There are so many more things I could write about what is going on but I just don't have time or the energy to do so. Just know that he is waking up OK now but he is having MAJOR mood swings. He is so out of control but I'm not upset by this. He doesn't want to be out of control. I feel so bad for him and I hope tomorrow will be better. He needs to be able to function.

A Hard Time

I haven't posted much. There isn't much time for it lately. Brian went to Spain the week we got home from Naperville. Marshall was already out of control but when Brian left, it got worse. I don't have time to go into it all. Just a few highlights: Marshall got more violent with me and more obsessive with his favorite computer game. Nate did a great job at his Dance Festival for school (pictures are coming, I promise!!), and he got elected by his class as "Most Likely To Become President." That's my boy!! Also, we got the results back from Marshall's school testing. He will not be in Special Ed anymore. That means he doesn't get an IEP and we don't get to send him to Preschool anymore. He will either go to a tuition based preschool or Head Start. I haven't decided yet. I also have considered sending Nate back to the Charter School but I doubt I will. We only have a year left before Brian graduates and I don't think it would be a good idea to switch him again right now.

I'm having a hard time. This trial in my life is not an easy one. It's so frustrating to see my darling 4 yr old so out of control. I'm doing the very best I can! I search out things that might help him. I've spent lots of money on therapy stuff and books. He still goes to Occupational Therapy and has for over 2 yrs now. I want to cry when I see Marshall walking around shaking his hands (it's called stemming). This week a little boy who is 5, called Marshall a bad boy. I've had grown men laugh at Marshall for shaking his hands. It's so sad. I worry about his future. I wonder when he will no longer be able to "keep it together" at school. I'm doing all the research I can to help my child. Will it be enough? I'm just not sure.

This video was very good for me to see tonight. It is from a talk that Elder Quintin L. Cook of the Quorum of the Twelve Apostles gave at our recent General Conference.

Mother Of The Year

My friend Autumn nominated me for Mother of the Year. How cool is that?! Check out the video HERE

Enough about me, here's a great tribute to all Moms out there..

Naperville Trip Part One

For the first time in 18 yrs, I went back to Naperville. Ok, I lied. I went back one other time but it was only for a few days. This time I got to see more people but it just went by way too fast! Here we are all loaded up and ready to go. We took Brian's mom with us to help entertain Marshall. Here's a better view of Nate in the back...


Before we left, we gave Nathan a little surprise....
After much coaxing, someone FINALLY convinced me to teach their cihldren piano. In exchange for piano lessons, they bought Nate a brand new Nintendo DS, a carrying case, and 2 games. He was SHOCKED!!!






Needless to say, we never heard a peep out of that boy the WHOLE trip!! He was happy as could be. :) He's always been such an easy going kid anyway.

It was a very long drive but we finally made it to our destination... Naperville, Illinois. I was so happy to finally be HOME. I've lived in Utah longer than I lived in Naperville but it still felt like finally I was home.

We had a whirlwind of a visit. We got in late Thursday night and stayed with a very generous family. Our children formed a lasting bond during that week and they can't wait to see each other again.

Friday we went to The Museum of Science and Industry. I'm sure Nate could spend DAYS there exploring and learning...it's right up his alley. Marshall seemed to enjoy it but I think it was way too overstimulating to him. He kept running away and just couldn't stay focused on anything for more than a second or two. He loved the Idea Factory section of the museum. It had lots of water to play with. That's right up his alley. He seemed to have a great time there.

Saturday, Brian and Nate spent the day at Great America while I went to a rehearsal. The guys had a great time and Nate even rode ALL the thrilling rollercoasters and LOVED them!! He also tried a new food... footlong chili cheese dog. Way to go Nate!!

Here are a few pictures from the rehearsal I went to. The reason I went to Naperville in the first place was because my Mother started a children's choir 25 yrs ago and they were having an alumni choir at the 25th anniversary concert and wanted a Grubbs family member to be there. Brian thought it was important enough for me to go so I went. Here are a few pictures..

Top: Jacque Hilton Clermont, Me, and Jayne (I forgot her name! I sang in choir with Jacque and this is her older sister.)


Me and Judy Herring. What a great lady she is! She accompanied and helped direct Young Naperville Singers (My mom's choir) for many years. She also taught music at my Elementary School. I really missed her!

Sunday, we drove around and showed the kids where I used to live and go to school. This was our first home in Naperville. It was on Lilac Lane. I'm pretty sure we have a picture of us kids standing by that tree. I remember there being a birch tree too but I didn't see that anywhere. Here is us by the tree in 1978 and the picture below was taken on Sunday.



Our second house was on Pawnee Lane. Most of my childhood memories are there. We moved to this house when I was in 2nd grade.



The people who lived next door to me happened to be home so I stopped and said hello. Here are Mr. and Mrs. Nolle.



That is all I can get done tonight. Look for part 2 hopefully tomorrow.

New Kids Quotes

I added some funny stuff that Marshall has said to the sidebar. I haven't had time to really post about it but I write down things as I can so I won't forget them.

Spring Break

Well, Spring Break started after school Friday. He started feeling run-down Thursday. Friday he was dragging but I told him to just try to make it through since it was his last day before Spring Break. Unfortunately, by Friday night, he was coughing so we started his nebulizer treatments. He kind of stayed low key all day Saturday. I got busy getting a million things done (like always) and forgot I was going to take him to the after-hours clinic. I figured it's just viral so I gave him more nebulizer treatments and thought he would get better. Unfortunately, he didn't. He got worse. So Sunday morning, Briand and I had to sing in the choir. We all went to Sacrament Meeting and left Nate home (we live right across the street from the church). I felt bad about it but Brian kept saying I really needed to sing in the choir. After Sacrament Meeting was over, I came home to check on Mr. Sicko. I remembered that he has a Peak Flow Meter which measures the rate at which you can get air out of your lungs. I had him do the peak flow and his was very low. So, it was off to the doctor. But first, I needed to get the pork roast in the crockpot for Sweet Pork Roast Tacos. I thought I had purchased everything I needed to make these, but soon found out I was out of brown sugar! Ugh!! Lucky for me, my downstairs neighbor was home with her little girl who was also sick. So, being the great neighbor I am, I borrowed from her! I ran back upstairs to throw the rest of the ingredients in the crockpot and realized we had no salsa either! Neighbor to the rescue again. See how spoiled I am?! After borrowing AGAIN, I finally got it all in the crock pot, turned it on low , and ran out the door to take my poor coughing son to the doctor. The result was croup. Yeah, I knew that already. They gave him a dose of Decadron (a steriod to help open up the lungs) and sent us on our merry way, encouaging us to keep going with the nebulizer treatments. Well, Monday he wasn't feeling any better so it was back to the doctor again (why did my Pediatrician have to go out of town this week?!). Now we're told he is just having a really bad asthma attack. This doctor prescribed Prednisone (same kind of thing as Decadron) but had him take it for more days. She also said to give him breathing treatments very four hours but also do two back to back. He had several that were only 2 hrs apart. It took a long time but he was finally well enough to play with friends. He still coughs but at least he's not wheezing anymore! He coughs every once in a while and it's a LOUD barking cough. At least it doesn't last as long anymore.

Well, being the absent-minded person that I am, it never occurred to me that the crock pot might not be turned on!! So our Easter dinner was cooked chicken strips with BBQ Sauce on top of lettuce. That's about all I could figure out how to make without borrowing even more! What a waste of food!! We didn't realize the crock pot wasn't plugged in until it was too late.

Now it's Marshall's turn to be sick. He has a sinus infection and has been coughing more tonight. Here we go again.

It's A Miracle!!

For the very first time in Marshall's life, he has slept through the night for 8 nights!! Can I get 9? How about 10? I don't mind. I'm so tickled that he slept through the night 8 times in a row!!!!!
He has also continued to be in a good mood. He's been hungry too, which is also a first. Ever since April 2nd, he's been doing so much better!! I can't even begin to tell you how much easier life is.
So, what's different you ask? Well, after consulting with a Child Psychiatrist for several hours, his Pediatrician decided to put Marshall on an anti-anxiety/anti-depression medication. Can I just tell you, I have the most wonderful Pediatrician?! He spent several HOURS talking to another doctor about MY SON!!! I'm so happy about that. So far, the medicine has not had any negative results. We also went through a time when Marshall was wetting the bed every night no matter how many times we had him go before bed. Thankfully, this last week he has been dry too. It's so nice.
Oh, and he tells everyone that he sleeps on the top bunk. He loves it up there. I love it because he hasn't slept in our room for weeks!! I'm so spoiled...

Hello, My Name Is...

Comet Doggengadget Marshall Jingle Fett Steven Batman Bucklein. I builded bazookas for my amazing trick. Cuz it's gonna be big monsters to fight and my arm hurts. Uh. I love cheese and crackers. I'm playing a game where I am Jingle Fett (Jango Fett) and these are my bazookas and I'm going on a trip where there are really huge monsters.

This little boy of mine totally cracks me up!!! I'm always laughing at something silly he says. He said that Daddy is silly like jelly. I love the funny things kids say.

Some Good Days

Ah, it's nice to have some good days. Thursday morning, Marshall woke up in a pretty good mood. He slept in and was not grumpy when he woke up. For breakfast, he ate one egg, a whole container of yogurt and a slice of toast. For him, that's a HUGE meal!!!! Then he actually got dressed ALL BY HIMSELF!! That is a first for him. We were so excited!! We kept telling him how great he did. He kept eating good all weekend and has been pretty happy. It's nice to have a break from the downward spiral he was in. He can be such a loving boy. He loves to come in my room in the morning and snuggle up to me while he finishes waking up. I love it!

We had a good visit with Marshall's pediatrician. He looked at Marshall's fine motor test results and is willing to help us fight the school district for services if we have to. Marshall's fine motor skills are in the FIRST percentile for grasping but he is normal for hand eye coordination. Overall, his fine motor skills are in the 5th percentile. We have a lot of work to do with this kid but he will get it. He always does! Isn't he a great kid?

Join The Dance-

I LOVE the Sound of Music. It is still my most favorite movie of all time. I don't watch it very much because Brian hates it. So, I will post this on here where he doesn't have to endure it and I can watch this clip over and over again. If I were there, I know I would have a huge grin on my face.

Tag Is NOT Fun

Marshall is not a fan of tag. He doesn't like it one bit. Yesterday after school, Marshall and I picked up a friend of his and went to the mall to run and play on the slide and dinosaur skeleton. When we got there, his buddy Carrson started running away from Marshall, happily playing tag. Marshall kept coming over to me crying because his friend kept running away. I tried to explain the game to him but Marshall didn't understand it. Later, other kids joined in the game but this led to even more tears, more angry outbursts, etc. I tried playing with him and explaining how to play tag. I showed him and played with him. He tried to play again but kept falling down. One time a boy tagged him a little too hard and Marshall fell down. The tears came again. He was not happy at all with this game. He has times where he WANTS to play with other kids but it's like he doesn't know what to do. I finally gave up and brought him and his buddy to my house and let them play with LEGOS. Carrson would build different things and play with them. Marshall built Cogs (robots from his most favorite game, Disney's Toontown Online).

Marshal's mood has been sprialing downward. The last few weeks he was rarely happy. He cried a lot, got angry, hit, kicked, pinched, and bit me and his friend and Nate (thankfully not too hard). He woke up a lot, and every meal was a battle just to get him to eat a little bit of food. I can not even begin to describe what it's like to have a 4 yr old with so much anger inside him that you worry about how you will possibly remain positive and happy for him. I try VERY hard not to join in that negative mood. I shower him with praise over the TINIEST things he does right. I know I'm too demanding sometimes and I am working hard on that. I need to offer more praise and less demands. What child likes a parent who doesn't appreciate the good things they do?

Isn't tag something that just comes natural to kids? The other children at the mall were laughing and having a great time. Poor Marshall was completely stressed out. These last couple weeks have been really tough. Marshall has been so angry and it only got worse every day. It could be because he can't sleep that well. Marshall still has obstructive sleep apnea and restless leg syndrome. The apnea wakes him up, then his legs start twitching and it makes it hard for him to fall back asleep. Brian is wondering if the reason why he wakes up scared every night is because he can't breathe and it scares him. It would scare me!!!


No matter how DIFFICULT Marshall is, I'm so glad he came to our family. He is a beloved son of God and I just try to love him as much as God does. I pray that I can see my children as God sees them. It helps during the REALLY REALLY tough times. Thankfully, yesterday was a really good day. I'm hoping it lasts. We're going to visit Grandma for Conference weekend and I hope he will be happy there.

When Am I NOT Busy?!

I'm always busy but I decided to change my blog background because I can and because I get bored of the same thing. Plus, this new layout totally fits me!

How Tremendous Is A Trillion?

Does anyone else think it is INSANE how much money our government is spending these days? I just watched a segment of The Glenn Beck Show in which he talks about how big a Trillion dollars really is. He asked his producers why nobody is really reporting on the fact that our government is printing money it doesn't have, and printing a LOT!!

One of Marshall's books is called, "How Much is a Million?". It explains how big a million, a billion, and a trillion are by using things kids will understand. The book says,
"How tremendous is a trillion? If a trillion kids stood on top of each other, they would reach way, way, way beyond the moon-beyond Mars and Jupiter, too, and almost as far as Saturn's rings.

If you wanted to count from one to one trillion, it would take you almost 200,000 years.

If you put a trillion goldfish in a goldfish bowl, the bowl would have to be as big as a city harbor.

If you put a trillion of our stars onto a gigantic roll of paper, it would stretch all the way from New York to New Zealand."

That's pretty big. Maybe you are a visual learner and need a picture example. Ok, I got that covered. Glenn Beck shows you how big a trillion is in this video segment-