Hello Again

Okay, I know, I have been a horrible blogger. What can I say? Christmas was wonderful! The only downfall was when Nikell opened our van doors without us knowing in the middle of a snowstorm. By the time it was discovered the doors were frozen open with two inches of snow from the front of the van to the back. What a mess, but a little on the funny side too...

Anyway, I AM STILL ALIVE, just not motivated enough to hook up the camera when the house is a mess and there is a WII to play...

So Mialee said to me this morning, after a hug, "Mom, I love you, even if you do stink."

Sorry I checked out there for a while--Food Poisoning? Stomach Flu? Something tried to kill me, really. We won't go into details...but let's just say that I am thankful, once again, for my Dad! He drove up in a snow storm so I could hobble to court (tenant vs landlord--me trying to get money from the deadbeats) and then took care of my kids, did the dishes, AND made stew! while I laid on the couch moaning. He even stripped the beds and changed the sheets for me before he left today. Now that's true love.

And for you all....I found a quote by our beloved Prophet that I fell in love with today...

You have a heritage; honor it.
You will meet temptation; withstand it.
You know the truth; live it.
You possess a testimony; share it.

Two Things...Totally Unrelated

You know how passionate Jason is about Christmas? This year he has been having fun coming home early from work and BAKING! I know, pick yourself up off the floor, he is actually a very good cook when he wants to be (I have come to think that the few mishaps he has had were more about lack of enthusiasm for helping and thus not listening...but I could be wrong). Anyway, how sweet is this? He worked extra hard last month so he could have extra hours to share and then to top it off he is making yummy treats like these Italian Christmas Tree Cookies. Oh how I love this season (and my cute Jason for his passion in making it wonderful for all of us). I hope you're not offended that I called you "my cute Jason."

And thing number two that I was thinking about today....A fun car game for those of you who have emerging readers (great at around age 4-5). One step in the reading process is for children to be able to put sounds together (duh, I know). So a GREAT way to facilitate this is to play a guessing game (cause who doesn't love a guessing game?). Start off with two sounds..."uuuuu" and "ppp" Pause between them. Tell your kids that you are going to say some sounds and they get to try and guess the words. Say them slowly and separately and wait for them to guess. Keep repeating the sounds, eventually blending them together so they can "hear" the word, if they weren't able to guess. Be patient and make it fun (pretend like they are always winning). Start with two sounds and when they get the hang of two, go to three. Some good words...

up
at
do
go
no
so
me
you
see

and some three "sound" ones

cat (sat, hat, mat, fat...they like it when you change the first letter and I can't even tell you the number of things this facilitates, but I bet you could guess a few)
mom
dad
dog (dot, doc)
bug
tree
men
fox
top

You get the idea? Try it, you'll like it and it's fun to see them go from "clueless" to three or four sound words. Oh, and make sure you are saying the correct sounds, none of this "pu" and "bu" crap.

KIDZ

So, I have a dear friend from High School that I recently reconnected with. Many of you have heard me talk about her sweet little girl, Chloe, who has infantile spasms. I spent a lot of time in Tara's basement during high school, but could never really figure her out. I often wondered why someone as popular, beautiful, and rich as Tara would ever waste time on me and because of a few issues I had with trust and "letting people in" I think she was quite frustrated with me at times. However, I have come to realize that Tara is all heart. People like Tara are able to be friends with everyone and give their full love to each individual just as that person needs. She was always giving. She is the one who talked me into cutting my reeeaaally long hair (in fact, if I recall, she paid to have it straightened and cut so that I would actually do it), and I have never looked back. And in the past few months I have reconnected with Tara on a level that I was never really able (or willing) to during High School.

I remember the first night I found her blog. I was so curious to know her story and I found it on a connecting blog (also authored by her) called KIDZ. Here she told her story of having a perfectly normal baby that turned out to have a neurological disorder. She told of her of struggle to convince someone, anyone, that something was actually wrong, the steps she took to find help, and the ways she fights to make her baby's life better every day. I was hooked. But she even took it a step further, as is typical of Tara, and created this blog called KIDZ so that all parents of children with special needs could find help and rejoice in the love they have, not only for their special needs kids, but for each other as a support group.

She has recently re-vamped this website and yesterday, she posted a story that she put together from an interview about Mialee. If your not sick-to-death of reading about my struggles with Mialee then go check out her story AND Tara's amazing blog. Leave a comment--it helps those of us who are struggling! This link goes straight to the story, but there is a link on the sidebar for the KIDZ blog for future reference.

MEETING MIALEE (Her Story and Mine)

Oh, and thank you, thank you, for all of your previous support and comments. Sometimes writing about my life, that I love, is the only out I have as Mialee is constantly seeking reassurance, Nikell is refusing to be put down, and Sierra is asking about her latest project. :)*

Jeri Dawn

Must tell her the truth

...was the title of the article to ANNIE in today's paper (which I don't normally read, but after checking out the recipes for nutty mint chocolate squares, I moved on to the next page).

It had to be about someone cheating on their spouse and it was and I was thinking, "Good, at least she told them to tell the truth." NOPE!

This guy, who is 67 and now retired, had formed a relationship with some lady at work. He now worries that his wife is becoming suspicious and the next time he saw his affair-partner-co-worker he told her that it was over because he has come to realize how much his marriage means to him and that "my wife seems less trustful of me than ever before in our 46 years of marriage. I've seen a change come over her that hurts me..." His next statement is "Since I'm fairly positive my wife knows nothing of Mary, what possible purpose would it serve to tell her now? I've ended it permanently. Am I a coward for not coming clean? I fear the outcome if I confess."

Okay, so here ya go, ANNIE, give him you great advice and tell him to fess up..."If you have broken it off completely, it's time to show your wife some devotion. Be attentive and appreciative. Give her no reason to doubt you. You don't have to bring up the affair, but if your wife should question you directly, you must tell her the truth. Lying on top of the betrayal would be more than she could forgive."

WHAT!!! Hello? Where are your morals? If your husband had an affair with someone would you really want him to not tell you? And am I the only one that sees a problem with this? Not telling her IS LYING! Just because someone doesn't ask you directly doesn't mean you are not lying to them. If you brake someone's window and walk away and tell yourself that you will confess if they ever confront you, your are not telling the whole truth. Seems like a simple primary principle to me. Plus it really irritates me that the guy fears the outcome of his sin more than he values fessing up and properly setting things right.

Anyway, it made me wonder...would I want my husband to tell me? Would you want yours to tell you? In my opinion, if would go a lot better for him with a repentant attitude than me suspecting and wondering and maybe even finding out for myself. What about you?

The Mother Ship Has Landed

Saturday morning I walked outside and thought for sure that construction had begun on a new addition to my house. Unfortunately, I was wrong. Fortunately, the solar air heaters were going up! Honestly, I laugh when I see these (like from the church parking lot through the block). They're totally awesome and warm too! If you want more details (and you are good at sorting through numbers :)) check out Jason's blog HERE. Oh, and here is Jason's Herald Journal aritcle for the week HERE.

On Albertsons

Before Thanksgiving, I was doing a little grocery shopping. Macey's is my preferred choice for grocery shopping, not only for the prices, but for their general overall kindness and willingness to do things for the community. However, I had decided to hit the cheese factory for several cheese-like items, one of which they did not have. So I resigned myself to quick stop at Alberstons for Ricotta Cheese. Ha ha ha ha ha ha ha. Not that I have anything against Alberstons, except that there is absolutely no logic whatsoever to their store layout. I mean, really, who puts the bread in the middle of the store on the right hand side of some unknown aisle? But I could even get used to that if I could find anything else! Anyway....help me think about this a bit...where would you look for Ricotta Cheese? My first try was by the cottage cheese, cream cheese, sour cream area. No luck. So then I tried the official cheese aisle. Again, no luck. So then I wandered up and down aisle after aisle looking for Ricotta Cheese. Finally I asked a not-very-bright employee.

Her reply, "Cotta Cheese? Hmmm. I don't know."
Not cotta cheese, ricotta cheese.
"Oh, cottage cheese. That should be back by the sour cream."
Once again, not cottage cheese, RICOTTA CHEESE! (Yes, I am starting to get irritated)
"Reecottage cheese? I don't really know."

In my head I am thinking that I was done talking to this person about two minutes ago, but I politely wait for her to ask yet another employee where this strange and exotic cheese could possibly be found. Employee #2's reply, "Oh, that's over on the cheese aisle." You could even almost see the slight roll of her eyes and the look that says, "Everyone knows that you big dummy," as she brushed me off and walked away. So now I am really irritated. It's been way longer than a "quick stop" and all I want is some stupid ricotta cheese! So I find one more employee who, you guessed it, doesn't have any idea where to find it. However, they are able to locate someone who does...the ricotta cheese stocker! It's probably not her official job, but here she was in an obscure corner of the produce section, busily stocking a little freezer with ricotta cheese. I thought, "Ooohhh, why didn't I think of that? Of course the ricotta cheese will be in an obscure freezer in the corner of the produce section, ALL BY ITSELF! AAAARRRGGHHH!" Okay, so I've already been here for a half-hour, might as well grab some cocoa. I thought maybe the aisle label signs would save me here and imagine my delight when I look up and see a little sign that says "Cocoa." Yeah, hallalujah! I tentatively wander down the aisle hoping and praying to spot a little can of baking cocoa. What do I find? HOT CHOCOLATE! Can after can after can after can of hot chocolate. NONE OF WHICH ARE ACTUALLY CALLED COCOA! Hot cocoa. Hot chocolate. Chocolate Milk mix....What the heck? I am near tears, fighting mad going to blindside the next employee I see, tears. And who shows up? The happiest "Holiday Helper" employee I have ever met. She quickly steers me to the real cocoa and even some jello and I make my escape while she joins a four-year-old singing their favorite Cinderalla songs. Fourty-five minutes later I am thankful that I resisted the urge to leave my children in the car while I ran in for some ricotta cheese and I am silently daring the check-out clerk to ask me if I found everything alright. But then, why would she? They only really do that at Maceys.

Mialee Says,

"Mom, I am being good today, huh?"
Yes, Mialee you are being very good.
"And when you're good you get the Holy Ghost presence, huh?"
Yes you do.
"Oh, I am so excited. I wonder what they'll be."
Oh, you meant presents....

Herald Journal Article for the week...

This is the post about Mialee and her OCD/Anxiety...

READ IT HERE

Oh, and thanks in advance, Fancy Nancy, for your undying support in helping us earn extra money for Christmas!

Happy Birthday!

31 Things I Love About You

1. Your laugh
2. Your eyes
3. That you can fix anything
4. That you try and figure out ways to save us money
5. That you're ticklish
6. That you never stop talking to me
7. And that we stay up way to late because we can't stop talking
8. That you run in the morning so that you take less time away from your family
9. That you run
10. Your Michael Jordon basketball moves
11. You always put your shoes and clothes away
12. You never put your tools away
13. That you can build anything
14. That you built a solar air heater
15. You love Christmas...a lot
16. That Christmas is about giving, for you
17. That there are only two things that you can't do--keep a rythm and dance
18. That you still dance with me on occasion, in the bedroom, at night
19. That you'll watch chick flicks with me
20. That you don't watch sports or play video games or hunt
21. That you love to be with your family
22. You unload the dishwasher, often.
23. You never complain, even when it would be totally appropriate.
24. You say good things about me to your coworkers.
25. You genuinely care about other people and want to help them save money too.
26. Your thick porcupine hair.
27. That even though you are a skinny runner, you can still take me in a wrestling match.
28. You still hold my hand.
29. That every time you get extra money you always give me half (even though you're the one that earned it)
30. You give the best massages.
31. You're just darn cute and I love you more every day.

To the Poor Lady...

To the poor lady who totaled her car this morning...I am soo sorry for you! I'm glad that I was 5 seconds too late to actually see it happen and I am even more glad that you emerged from the smoky pile of metal unscathed and able to pull your seven month old out of the mess. I am glad that she was okay too. She was adorable by the way and I'm glad she got to sit in my nice warm van for a little while, where my 6 year old had a hey-day entertaining her. She is sure, by the way, that she saved her life and without us, the poor thing might have died. Thank you for the reminder of how precious life is. And that every second counts. And to come to a complete stop and look both ways. Your honesty inspired me. I'm not sure that if I was in the same situation I would have so completely and forth-rightly taken the blame, even if it was my fault. I hope that you found your husband and he gave you the comforting hug that I'm sure you needed. And I also hope that your insurance gives you enough money to afford a new car (cross our fingers, and our legs, our arms, our toes, our eyes...). My heart goes with you as I envision flashes of myself in your situation. I loved my life a little more than usual today...

TAGGED

Nancy Tagged me, so I'll play..here are the rules

1. link to the person who tagged you.
2. post the rules on your blog.
3. write six random things about yourself.
4. tag six people at the end of your post and link to them.
5. let each person know they’ve been tagged and leave a comment on their blog.
6. let the tagger know when your entry is up.

Numero Uno--I HATE MONOTONY! I hate doing the same thing every day over and over and over (which may explain why I'm not great at dishes, laundry, dinner, house cleaning....mothering!) But I also know the importance of being a good example and giving my all to my kids. I am bound and determined to have a good attitude despite my flaws.

Dos--I repeat conversations in my head, often.

Three--I never realized that motherhood was the "end" of everything that I had worked for. Go to school, get good grades, get a job, go to college, get married, have kids. Anybody else's goals and dreams go further? Mine do now, but this was the big thing I had waited and prepared for my whole life and I have to say that however blissfull it all was and is, the every day monotony of it all was a little anti-climactic. Motherhood was something that I was going to be awesome at and I have to say, I was a little disappointed in myself. It's all good though--I still love to play.

4--I graduated from Utah State in Early Childhood Education/Elementary Education (A Duel Major!). I taught preschool at a Montessorri School and at Head Start before I had Sierra. One day, maybe I'll have a preschool in my basement, but maybe I'll go back to school first...

IIIII--I do not willingly pursue friendships. I wait for them to happen. And I have had some strange friendships happen.

And last of all--Flakey people really bug me. Don't commit if you're not committed. And don't bail out just because you think something better is on the horizon. If your level of fun is more important than my trust, then just take yourself on out of my life. Thanks.

Hmmm who to tag...
Shelly (I can't wait to read this...when you asked for random...)
Shannon (Hello, are you there? Do you need any help?)
Mindy Tech (another randomness queen)
Tiffany (hmm, how many of these will be about pregnancy?)
Tara (do you Tag?)
and Cristy (always fun to see what she has to say)

10 Suggestions for Parents

You know, I have been searching for answers for my sweet butterfly Mialee, for a while now. At first I thought that I would find tangible options to help her--something I could do right now to fix this specific thing, and I have found a few of those. However, resoundingly, the overall advice tends to follow these suggestions from President Benson. I think they apply to everyone (and He did too!)

1.Take time to be at the crossroads when children are coming and going.

2.Take time to be a real friend to your children. Listen to them, talk with them, laugh and joke with them, sing with them, play with them, cry with them, hug them, honestly praise them.

3.Take time to read to your children.

4.Take time to pray with your children.

5.Take time to have a meaningful weekly home evening.

6.Take time to be together at mealtimes as often as possible

7.Take time to daily read the scriptures as a family.

8.Take time do to things as a family.

9.Take time to teach your children. “Mothers, you are your children's best teacher. Don't shift this precious responsibility to baby sitters. A mother's love and prayerful concern for her children are her most important ingredients in teaching.”

10.Take time to truly love your children. “A mother's unqualified love approaches Christ-like love.”

Jason's Newest Article...

In honor of Christmas and someone who still believes in Santa...

Herald Journal Article

Banana-nana Fo Fanna

So I was thinking about this song today and being subjected to it as a small child. Most songs that include your name are so extraordinarily amazing for small children (Ever heard Raffi's "Willaby Wallaby"?), but I have come to the conclusion that this song is nothing but an excuse to make fun of people. Imagine, if you will, interjecting my name into this song. What did you come up with? Did it by chance include "Ferry Dawn?" Who wants to be called that? Now, as an adult, you can call me that all you want, it really won't bother me, I'm over it. But as a small child it wasn't that fun. And if you sing it to children their eyes don't light up, they look a little confused. And I agree. It is confusing having very large adult-like people happily singing a song that totally massacres your name. I vote that we ban this song. Let's start a petition.

Oh My, I am sooo honored...

Shelly, my old Seminary Counsel/Singing/Dancing Buddy from High School nominated me for this beautiful award. And man I am honored, even though she only knows of about 5 blogs total, I'm still honored...honest I am. Shelly is an actor and a bit melodramatic (in the best sense)--it's what made me love her from the very beginning. If you want entertainment visit her blog!

Here are the rules for the recipients of the award...

1. Name 5 things you love,

2. Pass the award on to 5 blogs you love, and

3. Link back to the giver's blog and tell how fabulous they are.

Five things I love....

I love blogging. I suppose I am somewhat of an introvert, except in writing. I will bear my soul in writing and I believe it is therapeutic. Also, it links me to the world. Where else could I find long lost friends from a life-time ago who will also bear their souls? Then we all get to laugh, cry, and experience the roller-coaster of life connected by the miracle of a computer.

I love my life. I love what I have learned and what I have become and what I have yet to become. I love that I will one day be better than I am and the people that show me how to do that every day. I love my neighbors and my cute little house on Canyon Road. I love the gospel and my testimony of it and that I have peace in my soul despite the hardships and trials that come.

I love children. My first year of college, as I studied to become a child-hood educator, I decided to get out and go into something that made some real money. I couldn't do it. A religion teacher I had said it best, "Don't go into teaching unless you can't stand not to." I couldn't stand not to. I love the stages they go through, I love how they play and fight, I love how they view the world. I love their toys and their books and their laughter. The true laughter of any child swells my heart.

I love my family. I love that I married one of the smartest people on the face of the earth and that he can fix anything, solve any problem, and that there are two things always on his mind (One is money :)). I love that we are still best friends and stay up past midnight all too often because we can't stop talking to each other. And I love my GiRLs! I would have never imagined that I could love having three girls sooo much. I can't wait until we can all go shopping!

I love God. It may seem corny, but I am constantly in awe of His miracles. That He puts all the right people in all the right places so that when I trip and fall into that big old pit of despair, here come those angels reaching down to lift me out. I love peace and joy that is beyond words. I love the companionship of a people who all believe in the same thing.

Five Blogs I Love...


Amy Sumrall Designs is a digital scrapbooking blog. She is so kind to offer freebies on a regular basis and I am amazed at her talent. Go check her out it you are at all interested in Digital Scrapbooking.

She Does Hair! Self Explanatory. With three girls and no hair experience, I need all the help I can get and boy does she offer it! I am amazed that people are so willing to take the time and simply share their talents. Thank You!

Hazlon is my hubbies blog. And even though I love him and am a little biased, it is not the reason I am nominating him. It is because he has such dang good ideas! His head is full of them and he is just itching to put them into practice. Unfortunately, time and money often get in the way. But if you want some good ideas on how to save money on your heating bill...

KIDZ. Tara's blog has already been nominated, and rightly so. So she doesn't have to abide the award rules again...but I wanted to put a plug in for her other amazing blog. Be prepared to cry though (good tears though, not sad ones :)) Thanks Tara for sharing your life with the world. We are all a little better because of you.

And last of all my old friend Spencer's blog. I really didn't expect to run into Spencer again, but have been so blessed by his blog. It is so well thought out, mentally and spiritually. It's well worth a visit...just be sure to put on your thinking cap first!

Thanks again, Shelly!

It's aaaalllll good!

One more thing today...

“There is a tendency to think of change as the enemy. Many of us are suspect of change and will often fight and resist it before we have even discovered what the actual effects will be. When change is thought through carefully, it can produce the most rewarding and profound experiences in life” (Marvin J. Ashton)

This is so true! Having my last baby naturally was one of the scariest changes I would ever choose, yet it turned out to be one of the "most rewarding and profound experiences" in my life. There are always scary changes around the corner and yet God gives us peace, comfort, guidance, and direction. Here is a story to illustrate...

“One warm Saturday in March, I was awakened by the morning sun shining in my face. While the rest of the family slept, I dressed and walked around the yard we were landscaping. … As I viewed the landscaping and our new home with all its projects, I felt a gratitude for the beauties of the earth and the happiness with which we had been blessed.

“My husband and I were celebrating our twentieth wedding anniversary, and we spent the rest of the day together. We had lunch at our favorite restaurant. We reflected on our years together, our conversion to the Church, the birth of our seven children, the goals and dreams we had realized. We remembered with fondness kneeling at the altar in the Salt Lake Temple nine years before.

“At the completion of our day, we prepared to attend the Saturday night session of stake conference. As we backed out of the driveway, I turned to Phil and asked, ‘Are you sure I look all right in this bright red blouse?’

“He replied, ‘You look beautiful in anything you have on!’

“Those were the last words I remember my husband speaking to me.

“As we drove down the boulevard toward the meetinghouse, a pickup truck pulled into our lane of traffic. The driver had attempted to pass several cars at a blind spot in the road. All efforts to avoid the head-on collision failed. Phil saw that the accident could not be prevented, and he threw himself across my body as protection for me.

“The next sound I heard was the rescue squad cutting the metal of our car. As I regained consciousness, I knew that my husband was gone. No one had to tell me. Yet as that knowledge came to me, a peaceful, calm spirit filled my whole body. ‘Phil is gone,’ the Spirit whispered to me. ‘Everything will be all right. Your life is in my hands.’

“In the midst of all the confusion, concern, and great loss, I understood as never before the peace to which Christ referred when he said: ‘Peace I leave with you, my peace I give unto you: not as the world giveth, give I unto you. Let not your heart be troubled, neither let it be afraid.’ (John 14:27.)

“I had suffered a broken neck and several other injuries. But on the noisy ride to the hospital as I was questioned by the medical personnel and felt the concern of my bishop and stake president, I remained at peace. ‘Why is everyone so worried?’ I wondered. ‘Don’t they know everything will be all right?’ …

“When I returned home from the hospital, the anniversary card Phil had given me was lying on our dresser where I had left it four weeks before. I once again felt the Spirit of peace as I reread the words he had written: ‘I can’t comprehend what it will be like as this happiness and love continue to grow throughout the eternities. Much love, Phil’ ”


Change happens. Here is a comparison to tennis that I like
(from http://beginningsnew.blogspot.com)

I'm not a good tennis player but one thing I do remember from tennis instruction in HS is the "ready stance." You're there with your racquet, facing the net, and you don't know what direction the shot will come from. So you're loose, mobile, knees bent, bouncing a little, just ready to go right, or left, or up, or down. If you knew where the shot would go, you'd already be set up for it. But the ready stance is for when you don't know. You're ready for anything.

I guess the key is knowing a shot is coming. Sometime, from somewhere, and staying loose & low. Not getting locked into one way of doing something, or one vision of how the future will turn out, not being complacent. Because stuff happens, things come, everything changes, and those who can't absorb or cope with change get really battered by life. So get ready to be ready, and trust that the Lord knows your life and what you can handle.

Much love to you all and the changes you face every day, big or little.

About the Little Things...

One of our apartments was trashed recently and I was able to find a new renter that wanted to move in ASAP. That means I have spent every waking moment of the past week cleaning, painting, scraping, sanding, patching, vacuuming, grossing out, and THINKING. We also had our Young Women in Excellence Program (a feat in itself), Nikell is sick, and Mialee is worrying. I have been a little tired, a bit emotional, and somewhat frazzled; but overall doing fine.

What I am amazed about, though, is the little things....My brother showing up to help clean and move out all the tenant leftovers. My neighbor kidnapping my children and then leaving them with her husband (she has 4 girls, I have 3--he answered the phone that night, "The house of 7 girls and 1 man.") so she could come help me paint. My other neighbor, who has MS and is barely functional, calling and asking if I was okay because I mentioned that I was up at 3:00 am too. A friend who called because my name came to her mind a couple of times. They are all little things. Really, I was just trying to get through the mess because it was my mess and I didn't want anyone else to have to deal with my crap. But people came anyway and once again I know that God loves me...all of us.

The other night I was pondering a few friends that I have tried to keep in contact with over the years, unsucessfully. I get frustrated because these friends literally saved my life during high school and now we can't even converse with each other. But then I realized that God knew I needed help and He had people willing to listen and so they helped. And now that I don't need their help anymore, we've all moved on and separated. It saddens me that they aren't willing to put forth the effort that I am to keep our friendship alive. But at the same time, I am so thankful that they were willing to invest their lives in mine when I so crucially needed it. And so I cling to those memories and thank God for them. And now I relish in the knowledge that He never stops listening and new people will come.

So here is a big ThAnkS to everyone who listens.

Sweet Mialee

Sweet Butterfly Mialee was doing so well for a while, and then Halloween hit. She has a new dialog that she goes through. At first it was something along the line of, "I did something and I didn't. And I want to tell you and I don't. And the things I say and the things I do. And is it okay? It's okay." Notice the self-reassuring. This is because I often turn the question back to her and ask her if it's okay. Lately she has shortened it to, "Mom, I do what I do and I say what I say." Don't we all.

AND THE WINNER IS...

THE WINNER OF THE $50 GAS/GROCERY CARD IS...................

Meg! MEG! meg! mEg! MeG! Yeah MMMMEEEEEGGGGSSS!

Email me your address and I will send it to you! jeridawnm@yahoo.com

P.S. Jason did an article this week, in case you are interested....HERALD JOURNAL ARTICLE
(It's about BUNCO!)

HALLOWEEN

CONTEST, A CONTEST, HERE IS A CONTEST!

Thank you one and all for viewing my Newspaper Online Post this past week. You are such nice, kind people...all of you.

I have decided to post another tid-bit in hopes of winning a gas card for you! It's actually a Smiths Card--So, BONUS!, you can use it for Gas or Groceries!


So here's the deal. First, View the article by clicking on the link. Then, leave me a comment that says you viewed the article. If you are one of the unfortunate that haven't figured out how to comment, send me an email at jeridawnm@yahoo.com. THAT'S IT!

They announce the winner in Monday's paper. So, if I win...I will forward the $50 Smiths Card to one lucky winner who will be drawn at random. I'll post the winner on Monday and they can contact me with their address!

So....what are you waiting for....get moving. It's free money! Here is the link and don't forget to leave a comment (on my blog...or you can leave one on the article too!)

Herald Journal Tid Bit

REMEMBER, DON'T CLICK ON ANY OTHER STORIES!

Lately....

Tonight we visited some of our favorite neighbors. Here we laugh and talk and eat and talk. Tonight they made us their famous cheese-cake that is claimed to be "the best." It was. Hands down.

And to top it off, when we came home, the BOOK FAIRY had come. There on our table were piles of glorious books! THANK YOU BOOK FAIRY! PLEASE COME AGAIN SOON. WE'LL TRY AND LEAVE TREATS FOR YOU NEXT TIME. As you can see, we got ourselves a good 'ole bowl of cereal and dug right into the "Book Fairy Stash."We also introduced Crystal to the Pumpkin Walk this week. It is a wonderful, glorious, sight to behold where people all over the Cache Valley display their creative ability to make scenes out of pumpkins. And...it's free. And...Pepperidge Farms gives you a cookie.

Yes, this is a waterfall, made out of pumpkins.
And here is Noah's Ark. The Elephant Bums were our favorite. Can you see them?
We have also been enjoying the fall, not too cold, weather. Mialee and Nikell took me for a walk up the trail that leads to campus. Nikell climbed stair after stair after stair, and she loved it. We got to the top and she was ready to keep on treckin'.

Dethroning the gas card queen

Remember the $50 gas card? I finally went and demanded it. Anyway, someone named Shandi has won it for the last 3 weeks. It's time to dethrone her. Will you help me again? I
just posted the cop story--so you don't have to even read it. Just click on the link for me. Thanks!
Herald Journal Link

or go to

http://www.yourcachevalley.com/2008/10/20/thank-you-mr-un-grumpy-policeman

You know, life is not always as it seems. Looking at this sweet little face gives me such joy, but my heart also breaks. Mialee is a tormented child. I would say OCD personality type, but that's my diagnosis as a mom. She is always, always, always worrying. It started with potty training when we talked about germs and washing our hands. "What? There are germs?" Instant obsessive hand washer. We talked and reaffirmed and talked and reaffirmed and we got past it. But it has consistently moved from one thing to another for the past couple of years. And then it started to interrupt life. Every five minutes she had to come tell me something that she was worried about. She couldn't play, we couldn't go anywhere..not without the constant whispers in my ear. So I started researching a bit and seeking out help. Well, she has her ups and downs. This past week, Jason was out of town and perhaps this is what set her off, I don't really know. But everything that Mialee has ever worried about came haunting this week.

"Mom, I think I got pee pee on the cupboard."
"Mom, I think I said something mean."
"Mom, I think I whined."
"Mom, I think I hurt Nikell."
"Mom, I think I did something bad when I touched that."
"Mom, I think I called that person fat."
"Mom, I think I told the whole world that I was mad at them."
"Mom, I think I made a mess."
"Mom, I think touched something I wasn't supposed to."
"Mom, I think I did all the bad things that I am not supposed to do."
"Mom, I think I did a new bad thing."
"Mom, I think I did all the bad things and the new bad thing."
"Mom, I think I got my clothes dirty and I still wanted to wear them."
"Mom, I think I got my germs on that."
"Mom, I think I spit on that."
"Mom, I think I got my spit on everything."
"Mom, I think I was mean to that boy."
"Mom, I think I took that without asking."
"Mom, mom, mom, mom, I think, I think, I think, I think..."

Day in and day out, seconds apart, Mialee worried and worried and worried. She still worries. Even when she is not with me and she internalizes the worry, it's still there. You can see it on her face. I cry for her and for me regularly. I try new things and reinstitute old things. We keep learning together and I am constantly, and most importantly, reaffirming my love for her. Today, I came home after another discussion with a childhood professional, and cried once again. I am so worried for her and how her life will turn out and I know that I have a huge impact on it all. It's so much responsibility and I never have enough knowledge or patience or time or understanding...and yet It's important that I convey to her that it's not a big deal and that she's not driving me absolutely crazy and that I don't want to run away screaming with my hands over my ears.

And so today when I wondered how much longer I could go on, and the tears fell once again down my face, the sweet spirit of peace whispered into my heart that Mialee was sent to me, especially, because I am the one with the ability to help her. That she could have been sent somewhere else where she could have been beat down and less understand and unable to cope. Now, I'm not saying that there aren't other families that could have helped Mialee, but God gave her to me. He trusted me with her sweet soul and sensitive little mind. And so He will enable me to help her. And that's all there is to it. No matter our struggles, or our fears, or our shortcomings, we can have everything that we need. I am so thankful for that. I pray every day and every night and all the time that I will do right by Mialee. And I often fail. And then I pick myself up again, and I pick Mialee up again, and we start over. Day by day, minute by minute, worry by worry.

So if were at your house and you see Mialee whispering sweet nothings in my ear, No, she doesn't need anything...Except your love and mine. And if you have a child that you too wonder about, know that God gave that kid to you on purpose and you are the one that is going to save them.

A Stupid Thing

Have you ever done a stupid thing? It didn't seem that stupid at the time, but later it did seem a little stupid? Tonight on the way home from the grocery store I was teasing the girls and swerved like I was going to hit a construction sign. They thought it was hilarious. So I did it again. Then I decided I better not do it anymore because it was kind of a busy street. But a couple of turns later a took a quick detour into a parking lot (without blinking, mind you) and pretended like I thought this was our house. Then I pulled out and did another quick turn into the Red Rose Wheat Plant. I even opened the door and told them to get out because we were home. Ha ha, I'm so funny, the kids are rolling in their seats. It was at this point that I saw the guy parked behind me talking on his cell phone. My heart sunk. I knew he was talking to the cops. So I started the drive home, this guy following me the whole way. I had to take the neighbor girl home, and was kind of glad because I wanted witnesses if there was going to be a confrontation. I pulled into the driveway, he did a u-turn and left, the neighbor came out to greet me. I told her about him following me and wondering if he had called the cops. Sure enough, not one minute later, a cop car pulls up. Then another. And yes, one more. Oh great, was it really that bad? The first cop, Mr. Ungrumpy Nice Guy, gets out and the neighbor and I start talking to him explaining what happened. Cops number two and three, super grumpy serious faces, stayed in their cars. I surrender my license to the all-knowing cop computer, while my neighbor is kindly throwing out statements about Young Women's and Church...Thankfully Mr Ungrumpy Nice Guy doesn't think the car-chasing cop-caller is all that credible--at least not enough to give me a ticket. Mialee confronts her fear of the cops stealing us away to jail and we all go home happy.

Rambling

Do you ever have one of those days (or weeks) where you just can't figure out how you feel? I think the last week has been a roller coaster of emotion and FOR NO REASON! The angry monster that lives deep inside me has threatened to claw his way out several times. The psycho cry-baby has been bubbling out here and there (thankfully, not full blown and easily wiped away where no one could possibly notice). The sarcasm that is usually free-spirited and funner, has a little too much bite to it.

Why do we have to have so many freaking hormones? I can't take it. I am sick of craving foods that I can't find and eating everything in my path to compensate. I am sick of unsuccessfully communicating with my husband, and knowing that it is largely my fault, and then feeling hurt that an argument has ensued when I STARTED IT! I am sooo tired of my life feeling like it is not balanced and that I am unbalancing my children in the process. WHAT DO I NEED?

Oh, blah whatever.

Another day another room to clean. Love my kids and laugh with them. Read some scriptures. Try to find a fabulous recipe for dinner. Try to be a little better. Take on the world, with my children in hand. Lay with them and hold them tight. Find someone to help. Be grateful for my life. See, I know what to do. Now if the hormones would cooperate. And once again, no I am not pregnant.

I am guessing that this might have been a game of leap frog gone wrong....Not really sure.
Any guesses?

Tag #1 Image Tag

Image Tagged (Thanks Cindy).
Type the answer to the questions below in Google/Yahoo Image and post an image from the first page of pictures. PS--remember to load your pictures from the bottom up!

My Age: 30!

Where I live: The Promised Land
Place I want to Travel: Africa
Favorite Food: Do you really have to ask?
Where I grew up: Good 'ole West Point Utah
My Favorite Color: Pink and Brown
My Favorite Animal: Jason
Something that I used to love: Lick'm Sticks
My First Name: Jeri (ouch, that hurts to see that without the "Dawn"--see note on next question) Iris 'Jeri' - Louisiana Iris
My Middle Name: Dawn (This is hard for me to put "Dawn as a middle name and I want you to know that I do so only for the purpose of this post. Technically I do not have a middle name...)

My last name: McKellar (Coat of Arms)

Whew--that one was NOT for the faint of heart. So I tag Tiffany because I know it won't be a problem, and Nancy because she is game for anything, and Shannon (just because!).

Tag #2: Eights

8 T.V. Shows I love to watch:
1. The Backyardigans
2. Dora The Explorer
3. Okay so we don't actually have access to "real" television and so I only watch "old" kids shows with the girls when they beg. Either that or I use it as nap time!
8 things that happened yesterday:
1. Went to church
2. Was released from the YW Presidency
3. Was called to the YW Presidency
4. Bore my testimony about the YW Presidency (ha ha)
5. Taught the YW lesson
6. Played TriBond one too many times with Travis and Crystal
7. Went for a nice long walk in perfect weather
8. Planned out a new strategy for studying my scriptures
8 favorite places to eat
1. Home
2. Travis and Crystals
3. Nancy's
4. Anyone else want to make the list? Invite us over!
8 things I am looking forward to:
1. Serving in the YW Presidency
2. Studying my scriptures diligently
3. Getting in shape again (hip exercises, hip exercises, hip exercises...)
4. Jason being back from NR (I know he hasn't left yet, but it's going to be a long week...)
5. The smell of fall and crunching in the leaves as you walk
6. Sleeping
7. Okay...I am looking forward to Christmas too.
8. Being done with being pregnant with my next child (no, I am not pregnant!)
8 things on my wish list:
1. A clock!
2. A kitchen
3. Balance
4. That I new how to be a better Mom
5. That I had the diligence to become a better Mom
6. That I never had to put laundry away again
7. That I got to sleep all the way through the night
8. That I had enough time to do everything that I wanted to do and that when I had extra time I didn't waste it.
Now 8 people that I tag:
1. Tiffany (if she ever looks at her blog again...)
2. Shannon (if she also ever looks at her blog again...)
3. Cristy
4. Michelle (if she hasn't popped yet)
5. Cindy (so I can get a fun little emial)
and whoever else wants to play along...

I need Chocolate

I have opened my fridge, my freezer, and every cupboard 10 times today for the sole purpose of finding a fabulous treat. There are no treats. But every hour or so I think that maybe if I check one more time something great will be there that I forgot about. I was at the store just the other day and picked up a bag of choco chips (yeah, I am out of those too) and put them in my cart. But then I realized that one more dollar might just put me over the top of what's left in my little "Grocery" envelope and if I bought the chocolate chips I would just make a great bowl of cookie dough of which I would eat a good half. So I put them back. I have purposefully avoided buying any such thing because I know that I am weaker than usual and a little chubbier than usual (haven't been running as much) and as good as a bowl of cookie dough sounds, I really don't need it. Do I? I do. I really, really, wish that I had it right now. I suppose that means that it's a good thing I don't. But this bag of chex mix in front of me is really not doing me any good. Couldn't they at least throw in a little chocolate?

Have you ever had one of those weeks?



Nikell is sick...again. Although she has been doing much better, in general, when she gets sick it sticks and she is miserable. She cries and whines and clings and is extra clumsy. Also, Mialee seems to be worrying at a new level these days. I am tired and ornery and in need of a vacation from my children. Can you see how gross Nikell is? The runny nose, and dirt and food all over her face and shirt. This is her style when she is sick. I bath her and wash her and bath her and wipe her and she is never clean. And yes, I have also been trying to can peaches! Fun, but time consuming. Oh and the last picture, a true testiment of my days, two perfectly good bags of snack food sacrificed as ant food. Do they not realize how small ants are? Maybe they were aiming to feed all the ants in Logan...

TOU MARATHON

Saturday was the big day! And it was soo much fun! We were able to catch Jason and Travis at mile 18 (the girls and I) and then head off to mile 24 to wait. The bottom picture is Jason drafting off some poor soul (he said they traded). Jason's family joined us at mile 24. We went back and forth from mile 24 to the finish line so we could see them all. Jason shaved 9 minutes off his time from his last marathon (despite the leg cramps). Trav and Nancy did an awesome job too!




When Jason did the Ogden Marathon I pulled up and started walking to the finish line and was totally unprepared for the onslaught of emotions. I had to check myself several times to keep from crying. Later, when I talked to Nancy she said the same thing. This time I was prepared and welcomed the electricity in the air! It is truly an amazing thing to attend. We all cried like babies when Nancy made it in. You are awesome!

In case you hadn't noticed

Hey all--I linked Jason's blog to mine, but never really announced it. I was reading it today and thinking how truly amazing he is. Have a peek--it's on the list.

My Poor Rhythmless Husband

So Jason and I updated our iPhones (which I must say are the coolest invention ever!) and found some awesome new programs having to do with rhythm and music and helping you find music that matches your running speed...Anyway, so we have spent the day finding the beat to songs. A simple thing, right? Not for poor Jason. One minute he is proclaiming how awesome he is and the next he is crying out in frustration that he sucks. He said that on his mission he had a companion that talked about "down beats" and that you could hear a "down beat" in a song. Jason told him that he was crazy and full of crap. Ha ha, it's funny that I was trying to explain the same thing to him. We had to have Crystal reaffirm a couple of songs because he didn't believe me. His final analysis? "My hand is not connected to my brain at all."

Will Sneezing with your eyes open really blow your eyeballs out?

Travis and Crystal came over and cut Travis's hair. When I left to put the baby down for the night, Crystal was cutting Travis's hair. When I came out, this is what I found...

Ha ha. I think Jason got a little impatient.

Later, after a couple rounds of TriBond (we are up 2-1), we discussed sneezing. I know, pretty hefty topic. But earlier, while we were up at the college for Family Aggie Day, one of the games had the question, "Is it possible to sneeze with your eyes open?" Their answer was "No,"

but Travis says yes. I tried it, but didn't get a good enough "grip" on my eye lids. So we discussed ways to keep your lids open. During the discussion I looked over at Crystal and this is what I saw...



She was quietly practicing holding her eyelids open and sneezing. The best part, though, was that she would roll her eyes down until they were lost in her head--every time she "pretended" to sneeze. I questioned this and she explained that if you really were to sneeze with your eyes open that they would roll downward, not upward. She wanted us to try it, but we were a little busy laughing...So, just for Crystal, here is the question... If you were to sneeze with your eyes open, which way would your eyeballs roll? Please vote on the sidebar. And thanks Travis and Crystal for the entertainment!

On Responsibilities

There are a few things that I think are nicely and succinctly divided into husband responsibilities and wife responsibilities. Like plumbing. That is definitely not my job and when I go downstairs to find a cascading waterfall in the computer room I have no doubt that my husband will get right on that. And dishes. No matter how much I wish and hope that it wasn't my job, I know, without a doubt that unless it's my birthday, mothers day, or my husband is desperate for sex, I am the only one that will do the dishes. Then there are those items that we disagree on...like taking out the garbage. For some reason I really think that garbage duty is a boys job. That is why my garbage can is overflowing 75% of the time. I used to think that mowing the lawn was a boys job too. I had never mowed a lawn before I got married (unless you count that one time that Aaron had to leave before he was done and so he showed me how to push the mower up and down the lawn 5 times and then let go and park it on the grass). So imagine my chagrin when I found myself married to someone who actually likes the lawn 10 feet long. I also tend to think that fixing anything in general is Jason's job. But I am finding that this too is negotiable. Like the railroad tie flower box behind the garage that is falling down. Seems like a boys job to me. Too bad the boy disagrees. Anyone know how to fix a railroad tie flower box? And fixing my husband a lunch. I know Jason thinks that this should be my job. But I tend to think that making dinner and doing the dishes is sufficient. Put you own dang leftovers in a tupperware. And then there are those things that there isn't really a disagreement about whose job it is, if only agreement meant achievement. Can you guess? Family Home Evening! Oh, and mating the socks. I hate that. I know I should do it, but I really hate it. I guess it all boils down to love. It's so easy to get caught up in the 50/50 relationship instead of the 100/100. But seriously, sometimes my 100 has got to be more than his 100 :)... After all I am perfectly willing to get up and pour him a bowl of cold cereal anytime he wants me to.

SWIM DIAPERS

Classic Swim Diaper Behavior...

Who in their right mind...

Once upon a time, a very old pipe sprung a leak. But not to worry, the good fairies were watching over the nice people who bought the old house and made the leak occur across the magic line that is called "the city people have to take care of it." The nice people waited and waited for the very old pipe to be fixed. Until one day the good fairies cast a magic spell that blindly forced the "city people" to take care of the very old pipe. Hallelujah.

The nice lady and her very nice children came out of their old house and watched in fascination as the "city people" dug a very big hole. Suddenly the big tractor, that was digging the big hole, stopped. The city person inside the big tractor put his hands up in the air in astonishment and exclaimed, "What is that?" The nice lady exclaimed, "What is that?" A very old and wise city person had the answer, "A sprinkler pipe."

The very old house had a very old sprinkler system that a mean troll family covered up hoping it would never be discovered again. And even if it ever was discovered, they cast a magic spell on it that would render it useless.

God bless the fairies and may the mean troll family have to forever water a million lawns by hand.