No snooze button on this alarm

Working the night shift can be hard, especially when you only have an hour's notice that you'll be working. But I like to think that late morning wake-ups like this help make up for it.


Sure, he only got 3 hours of sleep after 28 hours awake (13 of those working and 8 of those taking care of all the kiddos while I worked). But still, I think he was happy to see us.

What a guy, what a guy.

Tell me how ... to give service

So much (OK, all) of this last year has been about me-me-me. First I was on bed rest with twins. Then I had just given birth to twins. Then I was raising the twins along with the other kids. I have been served countless times this year, by those within the walls of my home, by friends and community members providing meals and acts of kindness for our family, and even by those who live far away but sent gifts and prayers for us. I have been spoiled by service.

It is well past time for me to get off my duff and start giving back. Problem is, I'm still a bit overwhelmed to do some of the more "traditional" forms of service for others.

Every time I set out to make a batch of cookies, something comes crashing down (literally) in the living room. When I sign up to give someone at church a ride or bring them a meal, Ben gets called into work at the last minute and I'm left scrambling to fulfill the duty.

I want to serve others, but I want to love serving others, not wind up crying in the bathroom with an anxiety attack. (I know, I know, I'm a wimp.)

I know from experience, having been so well served, that there are billions of acts of kindness that qualify as service. So with the holiday season and my total inability to think of new ideas, I'm turning to you. Tell me how to give service. If each reader listed even one small thing that someone with a million small children and limited patience could accomplish for someone else, I think I'd have an arsenal to last me a while. And as an added incentive, I am committed to trying absolutely every idea you give me. (Caveat: if, say, your list item is to come scrub your toilet and you live in Minnesota, that's probably not gonna happen. OK, if you live next door that's probably not gonna happen. Just a fair warning.)

So, what ideas have you got? How can I serve others in the small and simple ways so 2012 won't be the year of me-me-me but instead the year of giving back after all I have been given?

Hammy's poor face

My dear Hammy just can't catch a break.

Well, sure, he doesn't have congenital heart defects or other major health problems. So I guess he caught THOSE breaks. But when it comes to all the little things, he just can't catch a break.

This is Hammy's face before dinner. What a sweet, happy face it is. If you closely examine it you can probably tell there's some red blotches everywhere. But it's relatively not bad.


And this is his face right after dinner.


Super blurry, I know. And the bandage is kinda hard to see through (or, you know, impossible). But the bandage was essential, given that during dinner last night his face started bleeding. Like, through his pores.

That's right, through his pores. We had noodles with tomato sauce, and he got sauce all over his face. I wiped it off, turned around -- face still looked covered in sauce. Wiped again -- not sauce. Blood. And there wasn't a cut or a skinned area. I would just touch his skin and blood would ooze out.

Talk about freaky.

I made the mistake of putting that bandage on him. I honestly didn't have much choice -- it wouldn't stop bleeding (kiddo has his mother's bleeding and clotting issues, I'm guessing). As it was, his pillow wound up stained in blood by morning. But when I pulled the bandage off for his doctor's appointment this morning, all the skin came with it. And now we have this.


I just don't know what to do for this kid. He has to eat, but eating does this to him. His tummy is fine. His diapers (as long as he stays dairy-free) are fine. But his poor little face is taking such a beating. A few weeks ago, when all of this started in earnest, he would clear up between meals. Now he's just always a little bit red and blotchy, though clearly the worst right after eating.

Some things I'm going to try --

• Straws only to try to keep liquids off the area around his mouth;
• As many neat finger foods as possible, again to keep things off his skin;
• Petroleum jelly and ointment all over his face all the time until it clears up and a good quality lotion after/if it clears;
• His own washcloth that is washed separately in a scent-free, hypoallergenic soap;
• A humidifier in his room, since everything got so much worse when the dry winter began;
• Any suggestions you can come up with.

I'd appreciate ideas if you've got any. I could especially use thoughts on finger foods that our entire family can survive on for the next several weeks while we try to get this under control. We've learned through his dairy-free diet (which, by the way, he's back on for those wondering) that it works best when we're all eating the same things. It's rough for a 2-year-old to see big sister or Mommy eating something that he can't have.

Poor little guy. If it's this bad now I wonder how rotten his life is going to be during this teenage years when the skin on his face is REALLY going to rebel against him. That is, if he still has skin on his face by then. Sigh. Poor, poor little guy.

What 7 p.m. looks like at our house

This is our view most nights at 7 p.m.




Aside from the tree falling down for the umpteenth time, life doesn't get any sweeter. (And yes, my kids sleep in the weirdest ways.)

Tell me how ... to identify an allergy

Poor, poor Hammy. That kid just can't eat anything.

We figured out his dairy issues shortly after he turned 1. And when I say "figured out" I mean we identified the problem. We've struggled to know how to deal with it for the last year and a half.

Now we have something new going on. Something else is causing his face to break out in a terrible rash, just around his mouth, almost every time he eats. It gets so bad that it bleeds (I'm sure he's picking at it at night which doesn't help) and I worry he's going to scar.

We took him into the doctor, but she thought it was just irritation from eating in general, not the foods he's eating. She advised us to keep the area around his mouth smeared with Vaseline and ointment all the time. That certainly has helped clear his face up. But it's done nothing to prevent him from breaking out again each and every time he eats.

So, friends with vast experience, tell me how we can figure out what we're dealing with. He has super-duper sensitive skin, so perhaps it is simply the irritation of food touching his mouth. But it never happened before. And we can't exactly feed him through a straw forever.

Maybe it's his milk allergy and we just didn't realize that there was milk in foods like bananas and rice?

Or maybe he's reacting to something else that he's eating and we're just not catching what exactly it is. Any recommendations on how to get a 2-year-old to only eat one-ingredient foods one at a time until we can figure it out? (Yeah, thought that was a long shot.)

We love our sweet faced little boy and would love to keep that face rash-free. I'll also gratefully take ideas on creams or ointments that can better clear him up if we can't figure out or avoid whatever's causing it.

Another stowaway

The kids and I hit the Nativity display Sunday. The LDS Church in town puts together an amazing Creche every year. In one room, they have dozens of costumes of all sizes so families can dress up and create their own nativity. This is what our family put together.


Cute, right? Nelly was typecast as an angel. She absolutely did not want to take her wings off. Hawk and Deak absolutely could not wait to get their sheep costumes off. And Hammy? Well ...

Yeah, that's not Hammy.

Hammy was wearing Nelly's coat and absolutely refused to take it off (I think for fear that she'd take it back). I was not exactly in the mood to force a kid to dress up so he could sulk or scream in what's supposed to be a nice, reverent photo. Not while I was flying solo, at least. So I opted to have the photo Hammy-less.

Enter this kid. No idea who he is. Certainly didn't plan on him joining us (neither did his parents). But I do know that when Ben (who wasn't there) saw the photo, the first thing he said was, "Oh, man, Hammy looks cute."

Yep, not Hammy. But I'll bet I could have turned this into a Christmas card and no one would have been the wiser.

My new goal in life: To make sure some random stranger is in every family photo from now on.

Yo Ho Ho

I realize now my title may lead some to believe this is a post about pirates. It is not. I was just trying to make Santa seem cool. Cool like a pirate. But I digress.

Saturday there was a fun shindig in town. There was a free showing of "The Smurfs" followed by free lunch, crafts, and Santa time. Pretty exciting. We had planned to go as a family, but I don't know what we were smoking when we hatched that plan -- Ben worked the night before and was as zombie as you can legally get without being shot with a silver bullet (or whatever you do to zombies). Fortunately my friend Meagan swooped in and saved the day. She met me there and helped out immensely with the kiddos (the babies stayed home with their not-so-attentive-but-still-physically-present daddy).

Nelly hated the movie -- I knew she would. She thought it was too scary. Like the terrible parent that I am, I just rocked her on my lap gently and made her stay through most of it. Yep, I learned that one from a mother who brought her 7-year-old to watch "The Dark Knight" in the theater. She just rocked the child through all the sobbing. I felt a tiny bit more justified because this movie was "The Smurfs" and the character she was terrified of was played by Hank Azaria. But I'm still just as rotten of a parent, I'm sure.

When Nelly just couldn't take it anymore, Meagan graciously offered to take her out to find something else to do. And something else they did. They found this guy.


Nelly was SO excited to tell him all about the pink robot (??!!) he is supposed to bring her for Christmas. Then they did some crafts while they waited for Hammy and me to finish the movie.

(It was Hammy's first time at the movies, by the way. Did I think to take a picture? You'd better believe I did not.)

Later Hammy decided he wanted to see Santa and Nelly remembered the rest of her list (a princess Barbie and a Jasmine dress), so we jumped back in line to see Santa. It got a little crowded in front, so I wasn't able to prevent this from happening.


They were trying to hurry the line along so they were taking family shots instead of solo shots, and not surprisingly they assumed this kiddo belonged with the other two. He does not. Strangely enough, though, he is one of Hammy's bestest pals.


I feel like this photo should be a poster promoting a sitcom starring Nelly. There she is, upstaging Santa. Hammy's tender little heart is quietly breaking and Kid-who-isn't-mine is mad as all heck and not gonna take it any more. Yeah, there should be a sitcom that incorporates all of those things. I'd watch it.

We had a great time (thanks to Meagan). I'm grateful that I've come far enough along as a parent that (with Meagan's help) I can actually take my kids out of the house by myself (with help). Nelly and Hammy are both at awesome ages to get the holiday festivities. And as much as Nelly may say she hated that movie, she's walking around all the time saying, "Smurfity Smurf Smurf." So yeah, I think she had a good time.

Now, if only I could track down a darned pink robot to make sure Nelly's not making Kid-who-isn't-mine's face at Santa next time we see him ...

Tell me how ... to keep my toddler away from the babies

I know it's not Tuesday. Really, I do. I haven't worked since the end of last week, which means I may or may not have brushed my teeth since then. And I most definitely have not gotten dressed or done my hair. But I do know that today is not Tuesday.

However, it can't wait. I have a problem.

Hammy is a sweet, wonderful, loving kid. He's the best. The very, very best. But he is a boy and he is 2, and thanks to those two factors he can be a real handful.

Lately he has been so rough with his little brothers. When they were tiny and fragile, he was so good around them. He'd kiss them ever so softly and he'd sit super still so he could "hold" them. I had worried and worried about my ability to protect the babies from their inquisitive brother, but all of those concerns appeared to be in vain.

Well, not any more.

He's not aggressive or violent; he's just rough. He shows his love by pressing his forehead against theirs -- hard. And he keeps pushing and pushing and pushing until the screaming baby tips us off and we forcefully extract him.

He tips the babies over as though they were sleeping cattle. He bops them on the head with toys. And the wrestling, oh the wrestling. He just loves to topple and turn and spar with them. It's as though he's oblivious to the fact that their squealing is not in delight but instead in true terror.

We've put him in time outs for beating up his brothers. We've rewarded him for "light" touches and sweet kisses. We've talked over and over and over about not touching the babies. And we've tried just constantly keeping them in separate rooms. None of it has worked for us. So what are your ideas? Any experience with a sweet but heavy-footed, strong-headed (literally) older sibling?

Super duper heroes

I'm not sure what exactly they're going to save us from ...


But I have no doubt that these are the heroes for the job.


Man, I love my kids.

Tell me how ... to stuff stockings

Can you tell this is our first official Christmas at home?

I'm not a young buck by any means. In fact, being female one might argue I'm not a buck at all. And while Ben is several years my junior, he also isn't the wee lassie he once was. However, this is our first Christmas not as a student family. It's also our first Christmas home on our own as our own family unit. We're not headed home to see my parents. We're not celebrating as a group with Ben's family. We're just us. The six of us. Ben and I completely outnumbered by the rug rats.

I'm stoked to establish some traditions of our own, but last night I was suddenly filled with dread as I realized one thing: We don't have any stockings. Why did that fill me with dread? Because what tipped me off was a posting of a "steal of a deal" -- stockings for $7. Each. That's supposed to be a steal. That times six is a whole heck of a lot. That times four is still more than I want to devote to felt that's used once a year.

I know that a good, crafty mom would make stockings for her youngens. But I won't be fooled by that, either. Chances are that costs about as much AND it requires talent, patience and time. I have none of those things. I also lack the perhaps more essential element of desire. So yeah, that's not going to happen.

Then there's the issue of filling the stockings. Holy cow, I never before thought about how much of an investment that was. Growing up our stocking stuffers were pretty standard -- we'd always get some candy, new toothbrushes, batteries for whatever contraptions we would be opening. There would be some small gifts like lotions or socks. As we got older we would get stamps and some cash. Then there was all of the stuff I'm forgetting. I mean, those stockings were stuffed. All of that stuff adds up. Quickly. And while we've got a real income for the first Christmas ever, I'm still entirely unprepared to lay down that kind of cash.

Am I being too miserly? Am I missing the joys of stockings? Who out there can restore my Christmas spirit regarding these non-wearable socks?

Tell me what your stocking-related traditions are. Do you have them? Are they new each year or the same ones you/they have had since infancy? What goes inside? When do you open them? Where's the magic that's going to make me say, "Yeah, that's totally worth the effort," or better yet, "That doesn't seem like that much effort after all."

Someone, infuse me with holiday cheer to get me through what I think/hope is my last hurdle in pulling off our first year "hosting" our own Christmas.

Look Who's Crawling 2

Some people celebrate Thanksgiving by counting their blessings, eating tons of food and gathering with family. We did all of that, sure. But Hawk decided that to REALLY rock the holiday he should bust out and start officially crawling.

Deak's been at it for some time now, making him my youngest child to crawl by quite a bit. But Hawk's performance is in no way sub-par; neither Nelly or Hammy started crawling until after they were 9 months, I believe, so he's still quite the little overachiever.

And now? With two of them on the loose?


Well, let's just say the fun has officially begun.