Do you know...

Do you know how hard it is to hold a baby who doesn’t cry?
Do you know how hard it is to tell that baby Goodbye?

Do you know how hard it is to look at an empty bed?
Knowing your child should be there resting her sleepy head.

Do you know how hard it is feeling you’re to blame?
And no matter what they tell you you'll always feel the same....

Do you know the heartache knowing she's gone for good?
And feeling that you didn't do all the things you could.

Do you know how hard it is to hear that it's Gods will?
Do you know the emptiness when your child is born still?

I haven't really checked out

I have just found it hard to write. I struggle with the fact that what I have today as my family, one living child, is it. I cant have anymore children and adopting...... Well it gets further and further out of reach. I have news of happenings, and will "catch up" but for now life goes on and I get more and more angry with the fact I cant have anymore children, Dang Doctor who thought she was God....