[EN] Ep.2｜Dressed in Friendship
From My Closet To You
〜Narrative essays, weaving fashion and heart〜
1.Yearning
Choosing what to wear. A quiet wish may be hidden there—one we ourselves have not yet noticed. There is a concept in psychology known as “enclothed cognition.” The notion that what we wear can influence our thoughts and behavior. They say, for example, that wearing a lab coat can heighten one’s attention. If so, then perhaps in choosing our clothes we are unconsciously trying to draw closer to the image we long for—“This is who you truly wished to be, isn’t it?”
2.Guidepost and Wall
“What to wear today?” We find ourselves standing in front of the closet, wondering what to do. The concept of enclothed cognition can be the guidepost. Starting with “What to do” and “Who to see,” we choose how to dress for the occasion. That way, we can bring out our best and look good to others. Most of all, it eases our worries. But there is a wall that theory alone cannot break through. It is something everyone carries, complex and delicate—our emotions, the heart’s very presence.
3.Beside Heart’s Shadow
Many things happen in our daily lives.“Tired,” “Nothing good ever happens anyway.” Days when we feel down, too. “I have nothing left.” Days when tears fall in secret, too. Each of these carries its own story, its own reason. So, we cannot always dress perfectly, as if our emotions did not exist. At such times, I wish to light a small flame within your heart. With that hope, here I weave a memory from distant days. This is from before I became “who I am today”—a story that attire gave me strength―
4.The Bond
There was a time when my heart was in pain. I looked back on the people I had met along the way. The first person who came to mind is a friend I hadn’t seen in years. At times, “siblings.” At others, “comrades.” Or even “guardians.” The one I felt a true partnership with, who showed me so many possibilities and dreams. It cannot be put into words, but what was certain was this. We shared a strong bond and spent radiant days―until the day we began to feel more than friendship―
5.Longing
“It has been quite a while. Have you been keeping well?” Before I knew it, I had sent the message. “What’s with that stiff talk!? I’m good!" To talk about the pain I felt, we agreed to meet. Oh…what should I do? What should I wear? When in doubt, I return to the beginning. Fashion is the world where I create and express myself. What matters in how I dress is “who I want to be in front of him.” Casual, unadorned―yet elegantly feminine. I decided to let clothes carry my past wish and yearning.
6.And Then Dressed
That morning, it was raining. The weather ahead was uncertain. After changing outfits again and again, my hand finally reached for a vintage long knit. Camel-colored, oversized, its soft silhouette drapes down to my knees. Beneath it, an ivory tulle skirt. The weight of the knit traces a mermaid line along the hem. I style myself with necklaces and rings, with a bag in soft white. The finishing touch is orange-red lips. Slipping on sheer beige boots, I was about to step outside. At that moment, the mirror’s reflection caught my feet and made them shine.
7.Unadorned Courage
He showed up at our meeting place—unfairly handsome. The rain had stopped, the sun is out, and I can see his face clearly. All too aware of his presence, I had long looked away. But not today. I want to keep my eyes on him. We talked about many things—the days that had passed since then. “So, what’s been making you happy lately?” he asked more than once. A tenderly vexing question―the attire is giving me strength. Unadorned, I meet his gaze and answer with a smile.
8.Candle Flame
Evening had fallen. On my way home, I drifted into thought. Our radiant days, as the light turned to shadow and years went by. We did not touch the dark memories. Between the two, an unseen barrier has arisen. It is separating and protecting both. This thin, transparent wall reflects our attire—dressed in friendship. We stand motionless. The light, like a flickering candle flame, suits us. How am I to bear that fragile flame, near vanishing? I long to seek the self I yearn to become—In whatever form, if only you could be in this world―Now, with heartfelt respect and gratitude.
Fin (Ep.2 Dressed in Friendship)
© Hilda Tutu. All rights reserved.
◆Related Content
▷ Ep.2 Aterword –Hilda's Voice– ◁
▷ [Reel] Ep.2 Piece Guide ◁
▷ Ep.2 Reading Fashion
―How to Wear a Tulle Skirt― ◁
▷ Japanese Version ◁
◆Series, Fashion & the Author
▷ About “From My Closet To You” ◁
▷ List of Available Pieces (Stand-Alone Episodes) ◁
▷ Fashion Writing ◁
▷ About the Author ◁
― Hilda Tutu ―
© Hilda Tutu. All rights reserved.
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