Sunday School

I have heard from many of my loyal readers (many being one) that there is a great need for Sunday School in our world. I have slacked my last slacking and hereby continue in your lessons.
Today I focus on Labor Day. As we all know Labor Day is a federal holiday in which certain lucky people get the day off from work and school children run amuck. But, did you know, it is an important day for the fashion conscientious? I quote from Wikipedia: Popular fashion etiquette dictates that white should not be worn after Labor Day. Originally it was white shoes that were taboo— white or "winter white" clothing was acceptable. The custom is fading: "Fashion magazines are jumping on this growing trend, calling people who 'dare' to wear white after Labor Day innovative, creative, and bold. Slowly but surely, white is beginning to break free from its box, and is becoming acceptable to wear whenever one pleases. In the world of western attire, it is similarly tradition to wear a straw cowboy hat until Labor Day. After Labor Day, the felt hat is worn until Memorial Day."
And there you have it. Put away those white shoes, unless you consider yourself "bold", and don't even think of wearing that straw cowboy hat now. In fact, just don't ever wear that straw cowboy hat.
Class is dismissed.

Thievery Thursday

(S)Helter Skelter

providing animals with homes since 1974

We are an animal rescue facility located in Any Town, USA. We thrive in uniting our animals with deserving families.

All that we require of our adopting families is:

1. A current drivers license
2. 17 character references
3. Photographs of your home
4. A $10,000 nonrefundable deposit
5. 3 current pay stubs
6. The name and references of your pet nanny
7. Your medical records
8. A criminal background check
9. A signed affidavit promising that you have no other pets or children in your home
10. You must undergo a polygraph test to verify your reasons for wanting a pet

Now, lets meet our pets.

This is Obediah. He likes to growl, bite, run away, mess on carpets, eat homework, dig up gardens, and jump on small children. Obediah would like a home with a pool and jacuzzi.

This is Calls to Clouds. He fell out of the nest as a baby and has special needs as a result. He likes to squeal/chirp, peck at eyes, walk around in circles, poo on cars, and sit on eggs. Calls to Clouds would like to live on a beach front property. This is Lady Mew. She enjoys yawning, sleeping, eating tapestry, and hissing. Lady Mew would like to be placed in a family of mutes.
On to another cat, this is Mr. Bigglesworth. He likes mauling, hunting, growling, pouncing, and the smell of fear. He has been difficult to place because his owners always pass away after adoption. Mr. Bigglesworth would like to be placed with a family that won't die after he joins it. He would also prefer to live on a farm because he loves other animals.
And last but not least is Miss Fishems. She enjoys swimming, gasping for air, being hit on the head with a mallet, getting grilled in butter, and being served on a platter.

Open your hearts and your homes, today.

Driving Miss Megan

My life imitated art today.
When Miss Megan got into a fender bender, her family decided she would be safer if she had a chauffeur to driver her around. This embarrassed Miss Megan because she was afraid people would think she was either a) a drunkard or b) so rich that she could afford a chauffeur.
She reluctantly agreed, and that is where I come in.
Today was my first day on the job. I picked up Miss Megan and dropped her son off at his school. She then requested that I drive her to two different stores so she could do some shopping. We shared great conversations and found out that even though we are so different, we had many things in common, like a love of Junior Mints. She found out that I didn't know how to text message with my phone, and (I'm getting choked up) she took the time to teach me. We picked up her son from school and she had me drop her off at her mother's house.
Tonight I picked her up for her book club meeting. I was too early and that sent her into a panic. She recovered and I drove her to the meeting where I sat in the car and waited because I wasn't allowed in. After the meeting she had me drive her to her mother's home so she could get some money (I hope that was legal). Then, I drove her to "the home" and gave her caretaker a ride home too.
I learned a lot today. I learned that barriers are placed on people so that they have to reach out and need others. It was nice to feel needed. Even though I got paid in candy and laughter, it was worth it.
I also learned how to add links to my posts, so read the plot of Driving Miss Daisy, and you will get deja vu.

Thievery Thursday

FIRST DAY OF SCHOOL
Well it's happened, my children started school today. I had to get a shot of them before they left. Unfortunately, the older ones had already run off (they think they are so cool being in High School and Middle School and College). But here is a cute picture I got of the younger ones:
Of course we are missing my little preschool kids and the babies.
Here's a heartwarming story about our morning: As I was fixin' Mary's hair and stirring the stockpot of oatmeal and packin' all the sack lunches and changin' the babies and getting gum out of Lulabell's hair and scrubbing last night's dishes and brushin' Bubba's teeth and sewing another ruffle onto Phoebe's skirt and writing their names on all of their school supplies and memorizing their class schedules & classroom numbers and signing student forms, well I felt a little tug on my shirt and there was little Mimi lookin' all scared and she says, "Mama, I no wan go schoo, I wan stay wi you all time." And that's when I said, "Mimi, you best get to school and hope your 4th grade teacher is better than that 3rd grade one, you don't talk right!" But it teared me up all the same her wanting to stay like that.
I sure do enjoy the freedom in my day now since I only have the 6 smallest ones at home. I don't mean to sound "boastful", but I just don't know what to do with all of the spare time!

my two favorite views of Henry

Melissa's Ranting

I have been sitting in silence for too long. I must speak out and get my feelings out in the open. Today I speak of the Disney movie, Aladdin.
Here is my complaint: Aladdin makes a wish to be a prince and his wish is granted. It's as simple as that. Why does this upset me? Because later in the movie, Genie encourages Aladdin to "tell the truth" and "Be yourself" as far as his relationship with the princess is concerned. Why does he need to tell Jasmine that he is not really a prince? He made the wish right?
That brings me to exhibit A, Jafar (the bad guy). When Jafar gains control of Genie, he wishes to be Sultan, and he is made Sultan for real. He then wishes to be a sorcerer and he is a real sorcerer with real power that he uses. He then wishes to be a genie, and he becomes a real genie.
So why isn't Aladdin a real prince? Even at the end of the movie Genie is all, "You have one more wish Aladdin, I could make you a prince again." Make him a prince "again"? That just proves that Aladdin's wish was never fulfilled, and he is rightfully entitled to another wish, but what's he do instead? He sets Genie free. Bad move Aladdin. Bad move.

Thievery Thursday

I am the MASTER!

I have been taking taekwondo for 68 years.

I can beat anyone.

Anytime.

Anywhere.

I own a school where I teach the ancient arts. I charge a lot. I make you practice 4 times a day. When you finally get a black belt, I fight you myself. I am often underestimated because I am a 72 year old woman. I always get the last laugh though, and I always have my picture taken with those that I have taught/fought/beaten down/humiliated for my trophy wall.

Just take these three for example, all black belts. All defeated by me.

Mu Hu Ha Ha Ha....(coughing)...Ha!

Before and After

The kid's bathroom

I had to end my relationship with the yellow ducks.

I was just going to get a new shower curtain, but having a Target gift card always empowers me and I usually spend it several times over in my head before deciding on something.

Before:

Before some more:
After:
Now I am thinking of painting it, but I most likely won't.
Reaction from the kids:

Sam really likes it and told me it was amazing (he is going to make such a great husband some day).

Kenzie said it was good.

Henry was unavailable for comment.

Kenzie Lou

Here are a few fun pics of Mackenzie.

She is modeling the hospital pajamas. She really liked them.

Self portrait.
Getting a ride to the OR. She waved at everyone like she was a princess in a parade (which of course she is).
First day of preschool, August 11th.
Letting Henry pose with her, I think it makes her feel taller.
By the way, she LOVED her first day of preschool and can't wait to go back tomorrow.

Take Me Out To The Ball Game

Saturday, our BFF's Jim and Amy allowed us to go to a D-backs game with them. It was fantastic. We were watching the game and talking stats. We were eating peanuts and hot dogs.

Then, I got bored with the game and starting snapping pictures.
As you can see, Amy was way into it.
But not really. Then I looked at this picture after I took it and was all, "Man, my face is HUGE!"
I thought having some bangs would shrink it, and Amy tried to help out by having no bangs. Still big, but not as huge, thanks Amy.
We left after the Braves scored 7 runs in the 6th inning.

Thievery Thursday

Let me take you on a Tale of Two Cities.

These cities are over a thousand miles apart, but on the night of August 1st, a group of women from each city set out to buy a book.

The first group knew they would need nourishment if they were going to stay up for the midnight releasing of said book, so they leisurely dined at an Australian restaurant.

The second group in the other city, was running behind schedule and only had time for dessert. To clarify, they only had time to order one dessert to be shared by all.
The first group staked out a comfy spot in the book store and sat around singing songs and giving each other pedicures.
The second group arrived at a very crowded book store and stood around for awhile. They then decided it would be fun to get a picture taken with a super fan of the book. This was the best they could find.
The first group got their books a half hour after the book was officially for sale.
The second group did not. But they photographed complete strangers as they walked out of the store with their copies...
and read over the shoulders of other unsuspecting strangers.

The End

Moral of the story:
Don't bite the hand that feeds you...like that baby did in the book.

A Lesson on Hydrocephalus

To give you said lesson, first I must start at the very beginning. When Mackenzie was 2 months old, her doctor was concerned about her head size. After a couple of weeks, I measured her head myself, and It had grown in circumference 2 inches. I called her doctor and she had me bring Kenzie in. She recommended that I take Kenzie to a neurosurgeon, and a couple of days later we went in. All he did was look at her and say, "You need to check into the hospital (Phoenix Children's) right away. You will spend the night there and we will perform surgery tomorrow. She has hydrocephalus, which means that she has too much fluid around her brain because it isn't draining like it should." (or something like that) We all have this fluid that protects our brains, but when it doesn't drain and it builds up, it makes the head swell, and will cause blood clots which can be fatal.
So, we went to the hospital, Mackenzie and I, and we checked in, and she had a CT scan to confirm our Dr.'s prognosis. Then we waited. I remember there was another baby sleeping in the room and he had these weird bumps on each side of his head underneath the skin. My heart went out to him, I thought, "Wonder what's wrong with that baby?"
The next morning, they took my baby away from me and Erik and I waited. About 2 hours later, they called us back to Recovery to see her, and there on my baby girl's head was a "bump" like the one on the other baby. "Oh" was about all I could say. Kenzie was there with tubes everywhere and her head sunken in so much that we could see all of her skull plates. I was terrified to even touch her, but the nurse picked her up and handed her to me, and that made me less afraid of hurting her. She didn't even cry.
Fast forward 10 days to her follow-up exam. We went in to get her stitches removed, and have another CT scan. That visit went something like this.... Dr: "The shunt (by the way, that is the tube they placed in her head to drain fluid into her abdomen) isn't working properly, I need you to check into the hospital right away and her surgery will be in a couple of hours." Me: "Huh?" OK, this time it was just me and I had Sam and Kenzie. So we go and get checked in, and I call Erik and break the news to him, he rushes over and gets Sam. And I waited. Same recovery images.
Oh, but wait, it gets worse. We go in yet again to her follow-up, and you guessed it, "the shunt wasn't working" what made it worse was that they scheduled the surgery for a week later. A week for me to fret and cry, and cry. At least the first 2 times, I had no time to even think about what was going on. The surgery went well and we went in for her follow-up 2 weeks later. Dr: "I still don't like the amount of fluid, I would like to place a second shunt on the left side of her head." Me: holding back sobs "Can we just wait a couple of weeks and see how she's doing?" Dr: "That would be fine." So, two weeks later, CT scan shows a perfect amount of fluid and the Dr is satisfied, "Come back in 1 year for another CT scan. She should be able to have it taken out in a few years." Me: "OK." There was also a memory in there, because this third shunt she had was "programmable" which means there is a little pump right on the inside of her skin on her skull, and I was taught how to pump (by pressing in on it several times) the fluid out of her head if it built up (we could tell by her "soft spot" on top of her head, if it swelled, she had to be "pumped"). Not a pleasant thing to do.
Today, I took Kenzie in and she got her shunt removed. It was so bittersweet. Bitter because she had to have surgery today and be put under anesthesia and there are always risks. Also, bitter because just walking down those hospital halls chokes me up. It was sweet, because this time when they took me back to Recovery, there was my precious little girl smiling and eating a popsicle. She didn't even cry this time either.
Kenzie: "They took the bump out!"

Megan IS a genius!

OK, stop whatever you are doing and look at my friend, Megan's blog, in my friend list over there to the right.
She has created something that we as average citizens cannot fathom.
Megan, you are amazing!

Sunday School, and Sunday's Cool

I am adding a new educational segment to my blog called Sunday School. In Sunday School, I will choose a word or phrase and look up the origin of it (most always on wikipedia).
To start us off, I have chosen the word, Eavesdropping.
Wikipedia states:
"Ancient Anglo-Saxon law punished eavesdroppers, who skulked in the eavesdrip of another's home, with a fine; the eavesdrip was also sometimes called the eavesdrop. Eavesdrop also means a small low visibility hole near the entrance to a building (generally under the eaves) which would allow the occupants to listen in on the conversation of people awaiting admission to the house. Typically this would allow the occupant to be prepared for unfriendly visitors."
There you have it. Thousands, maybe millions of people are misusing this word. Unless you have a small hole near your home's entrance and you are using it to hear what people under your eaves are saying; or skulked in the eavesdrop of a stranger, then you have never, not once in your life eavesdropped.
That concludes today's lesson.
Have a pleasant day.