Home Again

Well here I sit. Back in America-oh what a glorious feeling for so many reasons; the air, the fresh smells, to see my family and friends, to sleep in my own bed that is actually comfortable, to be able to drink the water from the tap, the cleanliness and beauty of Portland, on and on I could go. I had a power nap that lasted about 15 plus hours. It's about 6 am and I have been awake since 3:30am. I just enjoyed an incredible sunrise over Mt. St. Helens and thought how lucky am I to live in a beautiful apartment by myself and have such a nice and relatively simple life. Seeing the sunrise made me realize, although I have been up very early many days these past few weeks, pollution made sunrises and sunsets invisible-I did not witness one. Flying into Oregon on a clear day is a beautiful thing-what a place we live. Emerging into that first clean air, seeing the green green spaces and majestic mountains as we flew in, such a welcome. We had an excited (and patient) welcoming clan who met us as we emerged from the final bus ride from customs. Those Portland customs guys were the nicest people all day-starting from China to Tokyo and finally here. We were greeted by "Granny & Pop", Miss Ruby, my sisters Kristina and Jana and neices Emmy and Lily in their beautiful China dresses! Lily said it was the best morning to have to get up early to meet us! In delirium we shot the last video and had a lengthy photo shoot. So great to see Ruby and Hazel meet and what fun the girlies had holding Hazel's hands and walking her around. Poor baby on a plane for 15 hours that seemed to Chris and me like 48! Lucky we were extracted when we were as one of us was going to blow. As I sit in my buttery silk robe(Thank you for Chris convincing me to buy it at 11pm the night before we left!) and type away in the quiet Portland morning I am so thankful for the opportunity to be a part of the adventure in bringing Hazel home from China and also so lucky to have such a home to come back to.

mrs fu lee

traveling is wonderful, interesting , stressful, irritating and enlightening. i am so grateful that i have had this time here in china - to explore more and get a better sense of the place that my daughters began their lives. there are so many cool things and quite a few strange things- a mix of the i like it a lot and the i like it not so much.

this afternoon at the pool we met three families here with their 10 year old daughters. they were adopted 9 years ago together and were here for their first visit back. the girls were confident, beautiful and seemed to be having a great time. one day i hope to bring both ruby and hazel here. i am certain it will look like a different place. the changes in just 3 years seem huge.

tonight our room looks like an explosion happened when we were out eating diner. the big question is how to squeeze it all back in to 2 bags each and some carry ons for the plane. do you divide the treasures so that if you lose a suitcase you don’t lose all the cool stuff? hazel sleeps so i must work fast to get it all packed up and ready to go for our 5 am bell boy pick up. another long day of traveling ahead of us but then we will be home.

there is one member of our travel group that i have neglected to introduce, so as we prepare to leave you must hear about her.

mrs fu lee has been our companion since we were in xiamen- she has provided some excellent insight and entertainment. fujian province is famous for puppetry . the puppets range from simple to very complex - the monkey king, kings and warriors, princesses and simple girls and boys as well. so i bought some puppet's on gulangyu island for the girls. one of the puppets - mrs fu lee became our confidant and mascot. when things got tough, mrs fu lee came out swinging. she provided great laughs and eased the tension that arose on this incredible trip. she will be going to live with aunty b.

out our window the neon lights of guangzhou are sparkling in the pearl river. i am a little sad to say goodbye to this place, but i am also ready to be home with my little family.

Men of China

Number zero five zero. In China you really are a number. Anytime someone helps you, be it in a grocery store, a museum, the airport or the hotel buffet, instead of “name tags” they have a number tag. In Guangzhou I am noticing number tags with American names like Tiffany, Milly, Coco below their numbers. In the previous provinces no one had a name-strictly numerical identification.
After what seemed like a long day of touring in Fuzhou, because of the heat and stagnet air, I decided rather spur of the moment to get a foot massage. Schell led us into a 6 story building to the “spa”, if you will. I was instructed to take off my shoes, put on some house flip flops and given a number bracelet to put on my wrist. This number corresponded to my cubicle. It was what I call, semi private. There were two wicker chaise lounges, a very large TV(all rooms have TV) and half walls. The doorway had no door, just open to the AC and hallway of one thousand visitors. I quickly had to get in the head space of the Chinese way. No soothing music or closed doors here. This is China-TV’s on, pop music playing, workers and clients alike puffing away, constant banter. I had a male masseuse who brought in a wooden bucket filled with herbal water that I soaked my feet in. I was also given green tea to drink and offered to have the TV on which I declined. He tried to converse with me in Chinese but quickly realized my vocabulary was extremely limited. Both of us wanted to have a conversation, but after many tries and me even busting out my Berlitz Chinese phrase book we were left to talk with sign language. I asked him his name and after repeating it about three times and me looking at him with puzzlement, he took off his pin and handed it to me #050. Hmmm...It makes me really love my name. Throughout the two hour foot massage (and only 40 yuan-$5.00!!!) employee after employee came by, the woman stopping to look at me, point, a quick Hah-low and a giggle giggle and then what seemed to be a little teasing with mr. 050, the men would stop to give me the up and down and take a few puffs. He seemed a bit nervous by all the attention he was getting massaging “the foreigner”. Just when I would think he was done, he would switch to the other foot. His pantomimed questions/statements that I think I understood, included “did I smoke?”, “was I American?”, “did I want head and neck massage? he is good.”, “go to sleep” “drink your tea” and the one that baffled me the most- “would I sing???”-probably lost in translation, however he did do a bit of singing as he massaged-maybe he thought I would like to go karaokeing? Two hours later I emerged with noodle like legs-shot into the suffocating heat of midday. I thought I would go again, hard to pass up such a deal, but I seem to have motivation problems-lazy girl.
Schell, our fabulous guide in Fuzhou with the Hollywood directors’ glasses. He made the trip. Very flexible and a good feel for what people liked and wanted to do. Not only does he speak English with a British accent, but also speaks French and Mandarin Chinese, listens to NPR and aspires to one day work for the UN. His humor is dry and odd and he was quite the story teller and teaser. He absolutely loves food and Loved showing me the best of his region. He grew up on an island in the China sea and so loves to eat all things from the sea, although as I said before, he is very careful because of the horribly polluted waters of China. He took us to the river walk in Fuzhou and said “this is the cleanest river in China,” and we think the Willamette is toxic-think stinky brown! He repeatedly told me how sad he was that Fujian province was the cleanest in China and “look at it-this is the cleanest?” His favorite seafood to eat were the snails. He says it is okay to eat about 10 in one sitting-no more- “it kills me” that being his favorite saying; be it about the heat, eating too much, the price of dinner, whatever. I ate about 6-they were simple and tasty. His other reply to many inquiries was “no-not in China” with a little laugh. The day of the great foot massage, he had taken us to a restaurant that specialized in sea worm which I had agreed to try. Unfortunately they were “running out”-which actually meant they were out. No sea worm but we got to touch live anemones and ate a delicious lunch of steamed whole squid and the other specialty of the house: yam dough stuffed buns. They looked like a yellow hom bao-thin dough encasing a mixture of mushrooms, spinach and fungus, dipped in soy and vinegar-a savory treat. Probably the most daring thing I ate was pig blood-looked like black tofu in broth, actually congealed pig blood with star anise flavoring-surprisingly delicious-really. He took me on tours of all the restaurants that had displays or “buffet lines”-counters that you could choose your starters or live seafood from and tell me what mystery lay in each pot or tank. Pig blood night he let me choose a whole bunch of starters including mutton with herbs, duck and shitake stew, papaya soup, fungus in broth, pork “apple” cake, roasted yams, & steamed fungus buns. At that restaurant they served the rice in adorable baskets. I inquired about buying some and he kept saying we’ll just put one in our bag-while giggling. I felt it was bad restaurant karma and didn’t want to, but in the end, he had taken one for me and put in my backpack. What an endearing man he is-I miss his humor, energy, excitement and intellect-we all had many a great laughs. We hope one day he will visit Portland and we can show him the treasures and cleanliness of the Northwest, which I truly miss as I write this.

melange

the last few days have passed in a blur due to a non sleeping baby. no real nap or true sleep for about 48 hours. its been brutal and i hope will not be a sign of things to come. teeth are coming, its hot, and hazel seems to be grieving heavily. i’d love to say that i have some funny, profound or interesting thoughts for tonight, but truthfully i am just glad that for the moment she is sleeping soundly. so i thought i’d make this a melange of the swirling thoughts.

music- in taxis and cars this trip has been dominated by pop- namely the song,” i saw you and her walking in the rain”, now one of my new favorites that will always bring a smile to my face. interspersed with someone singing classic madonna in a chinese accent- think “like a wirgin”. in hotels we have been treated to the theme from chariots of fire, the titanic and many old frank sinatra tunes in true tin like elevator fashion. in our room, thanks to aunty b we have pink martini, some reggae, some weird french stuff and a variety of new hip tunes that i have never heard, but have enjoyed.

food- some incredible seafood in fujian, which britta describes better than i.i will say that our places of dining were very interesting. from banquet room shared with the male members of a conference, to the spitting on the floor place, to a tiny shack on a dirt road with wild dogs nearby on the way to the airport, to the 5 star buffet at the white swan.

accommodations- our first hotel was a chinese 3 star place, that was pale institutional green, had beds as hard as the floor and we dubbed “the prison”. a 4 star hotel in xiamen- very nice, not too fancy great swimming pool. a 4 star in fuzhou- fancy lobby, decent rooms, hard beds requiring many pillows ( princess and the pea style) but no pool. a 5 star in guangzhou where in a desperate move after the day from hell i upgraded us to a suite which overlooks the pearl river , has 2 bathrooms and a great pool. i feel like a decadent american but its been worth it to have room to hang out in this heat.

****
as i mentioned hazel has had a rough few days which have been hard on all of us. thank god for britta! she has been a trooper and a lifesaver through this journey. on a positive note, hazel has passed her medical exam and seems to be enjoying the pool. i took her to the 6 banyon temple to be blessed, which was a very important moment. i love the solemnity of the monks chanting with ancient words and sprinkling holy water on the baby.

as we left at the kuan yin statue, i lit some incense for her, and for the rest of our special babies.

images of china

All Big Noses DO Look the Same

  A Day In The Life Of Brindy
Oh my God! Yesterday, was quite possibly the longest day of my life! Many things contributed to the length: the heat, the packing, sickness, arranging, waiting for passports, a very long trip to the airport with two overtired nap interrupted babies and a few annoying adults, but the possibility of being held in a communist country with liberal capital punishment for fraud weighed the heaviest. (Note: As i write from Guangzhou, I am okay, unharmed, lounging in a silk dragon robe enjoying the luxuries of our five star hotel suite. Thank you sugar momma Chris!) Pressing forward.
Yesterday started with a wake up call from Mindy, who was suffering from a fever and flu like symptoms. She is traveling solo, so obviously needed some extra help. Peeling my eyes and ears open to hear Chris (Dr.Chris that is), give Mindy advice, little did I know what the day had in store for me. Dr. Susan took Sam so Mindy could get better as we had to travel to our final destination-Guangzhou. Mindy was obviously worried that she would have to stay in Fuzhou so we all were doing anything we could to carry on as planned.
Our last hours in Fuzhou and Chris had missed our trip to the Xiuan Monastery so we were off in zippy green taxi driven by a woman? a little suspect as she did not match the photo of the drivers id photo( a man)? Hmmm....We made it and you know the schtick by now it was blazing HOT and 180% humidity! (My Gramps would be proud of me writing so much about the weather.) We first stopped in the gift shop and scored some great pieces from Schell’s friend who had helped me the first time. The monastery was even more beautiful and serene without the constant banter and annoying humor and cultural cluelessness of Bozo and company. Back to our hotel.
I then called Schell to have him make arrangements for Mindy to stay at the hotel as long as possible. Many back and forth phone conversations to Schell, Mindy, Dr. Susan in the midst of trying to contain the hurricane that had hit our room (HOW did we get here carry on? Our stuff seems to have swelled exponentially. The humidity?) and pack it all up. In the last call from Schell he told Chris “yes and we will pick up babies passport and one of you will be Mindy. Just like that.” Well of course Chris could not as she is the mother of Hazel-so by default I became “MIndy-mother of Sam”. I was really too busy to think about it. Another ring...”Brit-tah sweetie, go get Mindy’s passport-you must have it. Bring it with you.” Okay, this is getting a little uncomfortable. As we took our last elevator ride down I was memorizing Mindy’s birthday and place of birth. My mind swirling with panic and questions. What is his Chinese name? Where was he born? What is My address? Susan plopped Sam in my arms and said “play with baby, you are his MaMa!” with her classic giggle. All loaded up in a three seater van with 11 people and the back seat piled to the ceiling with luggage. On the way to the baby passport pick-up Schell said maybe they will ask “how your hair grew in one day?-this may be a problem” What? In my world they would just look at “my” passport and baby Sam’s. I had forgotten of the photos taken with baby in the red coat and mommas head next to the baby’s. Yikes. I thought I was nervous in the hotel lobby? Now my heart was racing. What the hell am I doing posing as this boy’s mother in front of the police??? The Communist Chinese, you are NOT innocent until proven guilty, Police. Everyone was nervous, but trying to keep up good spirits and keep the laughter happening. If I failed, all involved would have to deal with the worst possible thing in the Chinese culture: Losing Face!! One of us thought that a hat would help. Hat, hat, anyone? No, no such luck. Chris ( aka Mary Poppins) then whipped out her bandana and we decided to fashion a sort of do rag for me-hide the locks. I have to admit, I was cracking up on the outside but really wondering what the Hell on the inside. All approved the new look and I was ready to go. A long, long wait with bored uncomfortable babies packed in the sardine can-the only savior the AC. Patiently waiting until we got the signal. Very auspicious weather outside, thunder rumbling and booming closer and closer and the clouds opened and showered us as we ran “in” which consisted of a few love seats and table on a covered marble porch in an odd police office building. The official took my passport, checked it out and then decided to do Chris’ and the other couples and laid mine to the side. I had to sit and wait patiently in my disguise. Finally, my turn. Big breath, act confident, excited, this is your new baby and you are getting his passport. The official opened the fed exed envelope with Sam’s expedited passport, looked it over, looked at “mine”, looked at our picture together, looked at me, looked at Sam, turned Sam’s head. Looked in my eyes, looked at my photo. A pause and relief, time to print my name; Mindy Singleton. A hearty congratulations and my acting career was complete. Whoa! Back in the bus and everyone could decompress and breathe a sigh of relief. Susan and Schell were so happy with my “performance” and of course only after did Schell admit how nervous he was and how thankful that I agreed to be Mindy and I had done such a good job. I was then deemed “Brindy” by Bozo. Chris says this name is his only positive contribution to the trip. His only connection to China seems to be his love and admiration of Bruce Lee-he loves to move his daughters legs and make kung fu noises as he has her “pretend’ to be kicking and punching Bruce Lee style...and he is another blog, another day.
For now I am so happy to have saved face, expedited Mindy’s trip and be comfortable and safe at the famous “Baby Hotel”. Out into the heat to frolic in the pool.

kuan yin

in many ways china feels very male. workers on the street and crowds in public places are dominated by men. Buddha is very important in the Buddhist religion, but so is kuan yin. kuan yin is known as the female Buddha, and is very revered here. she is the deity you pray to when you want a husband or family. i feel especially drawn to the beliefs about her.i have been wearing my kuan yin on her red thread since i began the process of pursuing this second adoption.

yesterday was our last in fuzhou. we decided to visit the Buddhist monastery in the middle of the city, since i had missed it on the tour earlier in the week. after fortification with java we set off, catching a cab from our hotel. the cabs in fuzhou are an army of lime green jetta's , mostly of early 90's vintage. with iron bars separating you from the driver, no seat belts and no carseats it is an exercise of faith to get in and go. one good thing is that with so much traffic composed of various vehicles: cars, scooters, bikes , motorcycles, carts and buses , nothing moves very fast. i spent a lot of time with my eyes closed when traveling by cab in fuzhou. our driver to the temple was a woman- a first for me in china. she was wearing white gloves and seemed skilled behind the wheel. i was a bit nervous when i saw that it was not her picture i.d on the cab and thought "oh great- husband is sick so she is substituting..."

we arrived at the temple and began our lovely walk. there is a huge kuan yin standing serenely in a lake filled with turtles and fish. its called something like 'lake of life" and apparently most temples have them. you can see several pagodas and towers from her vista and it is a serene and peaceful place. there was a group of women monks who were praying and as we stopped to watch, they opened a bunch of cages to let loose dozens of small chirping birds, and began throwing turtles into the water. i later found out that these were bought from the market and freed as part of the Buddhist reverence for all life.

we meandered the corridors filled with monks wearing different colored robes going about their business- talking on cell phones, cleaning , cooking, doing laundry. there were many places to kneel, pray and light incense. there were quite a few other visitors enjoying the morning there as well. we came upon a traditional looking chinese family- mom, dad , grandma and one teen girl. i was surprised to hear some whining in english going on-"its so HOT here,. and there are no elevators". they actually did not turn out to be chinese, but rather americans visiting china.i suppose that is in my future times two!

i stopped to light some incense at the largest kuan yin, grateful for two beautiful daughters, asking for smooth transitions and health for hazel.

the heat had intensified during our hours there wandering so we decided to head back to the hotel. if it had been 20 degrees cooler i would have stayed there all day. as it was, even with the heat it was a tranquil morning well spent on my last day in fuzhou.

stranger in a strange land

today the hills around fuzhou are visible and they are indeed lovely. in just a few days a small corner of this metropolis of 6 million has become familiar to me. i can make my way to the store, cross the street and emerge intact and not even that scared on the other side, greet the stares and galking with “ni hao” or “hello” and keep walking. it is a little hard to get used to the motorbikes and motorized vehicles of all sorts on the sidewalk, but even that doesn’t seem that strange now. they are so loud that you can hear the putting, sputtering and zooming of the various kinds of vehicles coming behind you and stay out of harms way. but there are so many experiences that remind me that i am a fish out of water.

shopping- i know it sounds like we are always shopping but you have to have water and pringles ( today’s flavor was spicy thai crab- mmm) not to mention diapers wipers and baby stuff. the system here is quite comical when viewed from the a/c of the hotel. in the moment it can be a sweaty, pushy , comical and frazzling experience. always worth some giggles.

first you have to find the department you want. when you decide what you want to purchase you have to give it to the sales clerk who has been trailing you along with 8 of her friends. she places your item behind a small counter in her section and then gives you a carbon price sheet in triplicate that you then take to the main cashier to pay for. then you return to her counter and she gives you the item in a bag with a carbon stapled to the outside. (this will of course be diligently checked by the door guarder lest you should try to leave with an item unpaid for.) imagine how much time it takes to get things in several departments when you are making trips back and forth to the main cashier and the little counters!

yesterday i decided that i had to get some kids shoes. despite the fact that much of china is somber and not very stylin’, the shoes here are awesome. if only they made them in barbarian adult sizes! i’d need another suitcase for sure. as always there was music playing overhead. the music selection here in china is an essay in and of itself, so i will save that for another time. as i was choosing shoes i noticed that the song playing overhead was “i saw you and her walking in the rain”. hmmmm. i have heard this song many times in china this trip- it was what mr shen blasted for us in the car on the way here. those of you who know me well know that i never dance unless under the influence of some serious alcohol. well i couldn’t help myself, with hazel in the sling, i started dancing in aisle of the chinese department store. imagine my surprise when the song kept playing over and over and over. britta is convinced that there was a big brother camera somewhere and the employees were gathered to watch a foreigner dance.

hazel is emerging more and more each day. she is very different than ruby - ruby took one look at me, knew i was a good thing and has not looked back. hazel is making me work hard for her smiles and i although i know that her close relationship with miss chen was a good thing, its harder to get her to engage with me since i am most definitely not miss chen! today we skipped the sightseeing , and spent some down time together. we took a bath listening to pink martini. ate and practiced walking. hazel has a little groove and was dancing in front of the mirror.

when she wakes up, it may be time to brave another trip to the store- with all that carbon paper floating around its easy to forget things!

elephants and angels

writing this blog has been great entertainment for me. i love distilling my observations of china and sharing them, i love describing the funny scenarios that occur when you don’t speak a word of the local language. i love posting photos of the scenes and babies. but there has been an elephant in the room here with me as well, so i will say in advance that this is not a light hearted entry.

all three of the families on this trip are adopting special needs kids. they came from different corners of fujian, a distance of at least 4 hours by car for each of them. one was in foster care, two in orphanages. when one of our fellow travelers confided that she felt that something was very wrong with the toddler who had been placed in her arms, i was certain that she was worrying and that he would perk up in a day or so like most post institutionalized kids. but i had not really looked at him closely. in the chaos of the civil affairs office and official paperwork that must be completed for the adoption, i was immersed in the making of my own family. on closer observation he was extremely delayed at 15 months, and had a severe lack of muscle tone along with some worrisome postures. when they came to our room, britta put it perfectly- she said, “well you can tell something is just not right.”

after 2 sleepless nights and fretful filled days, her fears were confirmed by a highly respected team of chinese doctors who examined the child who was to be her son. before getting very far into the neurological evaluation they turned to her and said, “this is not good”. in the end the diagnosis was cerebral palsy and mental retardation. not simply the cleft lip and palate that was so apparent. greiving, she made the decision that she could not bring him home, that parenting a child with those needs was not what she was prepared for and would likely devastate her family. initially her response was that she just wanted to get on a plane and go home. she felt angry and betrayed by the orphanage who to the end , kept saying that there was nothing wrong with the baby. after getting some sleep, she realized that she came her for her son, and decided to allow the ccaa to refer her another child.

within 24 hours the ccaa had made another match for her, of a 14 month old boy with a repaired cleft lip and unrepaired cleft palate. he had been living in a foster home with an american family who had named him “samson” and he was called “baby sam” by the children. (samuel, aka sam was the name chosen by her for her son.)

the foster family moved here from florida, called by god to foster special needs kids here in china. they have 8 children living with them, and have hired , and volunteer help with the children. samson has been with them since his lip repair in november and he was obviously well cared for. they were loving and caring people who gave this little boy the gift of a secure start in life.

in the way that life is often circular, and that goods things can come from bad, in a phone conversation after the new placement had taken place, the foster mother said that she and her husband are interested in adopting the first baby. someone said that she looked like an angel when she was saying good bye to samson, and i have to agree.

samson, aka baby sam

View From Above

It is so hard for me to start my writings each day. It is that “blank canvas” freeze I get when I paint. Anyway, I have been jotting down some things to share and I think I will write this entry stream-of-conscious style.
Pigeons. After the money falling you probably won’t believe this so here it goes. Last night as I was playing with Hazel I looked out at the masses of apartment towers and thinking I spotted a naked man on top a building, (could I really be so lucky!?) my attention had been caught. “He” turned out to be a sheet dancing in the wind, anyway upon further investigation of my vista I noticed another man on the very top of his 17 story building. He was standing on top of an aviary dressed only in black pants and waving a long stick with a red rectangle of fabric that had Chinese characters running down it. He seemed to be waving it in a certain pattern. Chris came to the window and we decided he was training his pigeons of which there were about 15 flying in circular patterns around him, each circle round the building getting larger. It was such a trip. We just stood eyes fixed to the swooping of the flock. He waved and signaled his red flag and they started closing in on the aviary. As we were about to leave, he went down a level and opened a door, one by one the birds followed his flag and into the aviary for their evening meal.
Schell (our guide) seems to be politically savvy and quite environmentally minded in this country of the party line, litter, pollution, and constant hazards. Chris and I were intrigued by a water pillow in Wal-Mart and he warned us it was bad because the paint on it was poisonous-very bad. He has repeatedly told me he does not trust small restaurants because in China there are no standards and says when he eats at them he is sick for two days. He no longer eats shellfish, once a favorite of his as all of the Chinese waters are so heavily polluted. He also told me that it is better to buy produce from larger stores as they use less chemicals and pesticides? When I was trying to find soy milk he really didn’t want me to buy it because it is filled with preservatives and chemicals. I had been drinking(in my coffee) what I thought was soy milk but it is actually peanut milk. It looks like soy plants on the box and tastes real good in the coffee too-so I bought some more. He also says the last three summers he has been scared for as they are so hot it is miserable. He attributes the hotter summers to the onslaught of buildings being built. There is so little surface in Fuzhou that is not concrete. When talking about summer and the heat he repeats “it kills me.’” He is very excited about my love of food and orders things because he knows I will try anything-almost. Last night we had little dried glitter fish with chilies-pretty good, mini crabs-about the size of a quarter marinated in five spice and a lot of soy and maybe some salted plums-I guess you just sort of suck the marinade off and spit out the crab as they have very hard shells. I momentarily thought I was supposed to chew it up, and was contemplating how I would manage this, but he said it was most often just spit out-not my favorite. Then snails-not garlicky and buttery like from the French, but steamed tasty and simple. Octopus was next and it had been grilled a bit and served room temp. It was a little chewy but smoky and flavorful. We also had a really nice fish that had been cut into very thin steaks and was pan fried crispy. I dipped it in soy and vinegar and it was excellent. Schell got excited and went crazy ordering, so the food just kept coming; kung pao chicken, mildly curried beef, amazingly tender and fresh stir fried honeysuckle buds(this is the season-they look just like lily buds before they open and are bright, bright green), sautéed baby beet greens, thick rice noodles with squid and shiitakes and a bucket of fried rice. All of this eaten on a plate the size of a tea saucer and fortunately a wet wash cloth in place of a napkin or the chintzy kleenex napkins of our last visit. Beer and soda is served in the big bottle right on the lazy susan and you drink it out of a thimble sized glass-makes me feel like a lush filling up my glass 20 times during one meal! Onward to the grocery store for some dried fish for baby Victoria. Her parents are real bummed that her favorite food is the dried roasted fish that is part of the hotel mini bar-(which they fed to her in their last ditch attempt to get her to eat yesterday). They were stunned by her disinterest in the golden arches McNuggets? Whah happened?? The grocery store: first to check our bags? I don’t think so... I surely was not going to leave my bag at a check in. It turned out it was just for the food Susan and Schell had packed up from dinner. Chris, Hazel and I decided to wait in the entrance while Schell and Dan got fish, Victoria and Laura went to the potty and Susan went to get me bug repellent/bite salve. Laura was horrified by the true Chinese bathrooms. Sidenote:to our chagrin, far less squatty poties have been encountered and some places even provide TP-big changes in 3 years! Well once again, there we were. “Hello grocery store customers the very rare and strange unicorns have arrived and are at the entrance of our very own store-come have a look.” I was about to snap a shot of this total mayhem-people pushing in and out, everyone greeted by a woman with a headset microphone on, the smells of dried fish, fermented fruit, meat blood and to top it off a man with a megaphone intermittently yelling I don’t know; promotions? prices? and then HE, Mr. Bullhorn, yelled at me and motioned no photos!!! I’m pretty sure he was saying something like “Good evening shoppers. We have a very important and urgent announcement. There are four whiteys in the store-Drop all merchandise and run to the entrance of the store! Maybe you can touch one if you hurry fast.” Only hours before at the local department store the little “red lite special” jingle had gone off that starts an announcement and I believe they too were telling their patrons of the red white and blue special as clerks in their red vests clamored to get on the escalator with us and the backpack department quickly filled with “customers” as Chris and I proceeded to buy small day packs-they argue to wait on us. Oh, buying things in the department store....that in itself is a blog of it’s own. So tedious and inefficient and tiring and just plain annoying with all the back and forth and tiny slips of carbon copies and then the fear of losing your receipt and being held in a Chinese Fred Meyer until Dr. Susan bailed me out. Turns out in buying our packs we both bought the same color-orange! Yep the twinness pervades!
Today I spent the first part of the day at a beautiful monastery that of course is very very old and beautiful. Most of it was torn down and ruined during the revolution, but they are building it back to its original size and grandeur. They have the largest jade buddha outside of Myanmar(Burma). Quite interesting. The only downfall of this particular temple is that most of the Buddha's were in glass cases. Even so it was lovely and peaceful and the most non-cemented area I have seen in many days. It also smelled lovely from all of the incense. Chris did not make it as missy was napping, so we shall return and eat at the vegetarian restaurant. Today we did not go there as “the others” just wanted a “sandwich” and aren’t into veggie food. My guess is the Golden Arches of Fuzhou will be getting some serious business this week. When asked “Can’t we just go somewhere and get a sandwich? “ Schell piped up with “Why do you come all the way to China to eat sandwich?”.
As I finish, Hazel is in the tub eating and playing with the banana rice cereal I whipped up for her. She was so interested in mashing it in her tiny hands Chris stripped her and put her in the tub to explore the gooey goodness. She is blossoming just like a beautiful lotus. Every moment surprising us with a new sound or movement or expression. She is so fun to be with and Aunty B has a sneaking suspicion she is a very very smart little baby with a sense of humor too.

adventures in dining

the tears have stopped and hazels personality is beginning to emerge. she woke up yesterday ( day 1) very reserved, but by the end of the day was giggling, smiling and blowing raspberries.

after her nap she woke up and i put her on the floor to hang out. i turned around and when i looked back she had pulled herself up on one of the beds and was cruising around the room! as it turns out she can stand by herself and she crawls everywhere. she will even attempt a step or two now and again. i guess there won’t be much of a honeymoon period where i can baby proof and get used to having a tiny person at home !

last night we went out to a local restaurant for dinner. i am getting used to the stares- and i do mean STARES of people where ever i go, with or without the baby. as usual, as we walked through the masses of people, bikes and motor scooters we attracted a large crowd : two chinese babies, two chinese adults and 4 Caucasians. britta with her red hair seems to get even more attention than laura, the blond in our group.

we ate a restaurant specializing in seafood. the place was pretty full and we were led to a table near the display area of tanks where you can choose your fish, eel, turtle or other creature to be prepared as you wish. have i mentioned that there are no questions about where your meat comes from while in china?! none of the hermetically sealed, odorless, neat displays of packaged flesh. it is all there loud and proud for you to see.

as we were seated at our table, the stares and nudging among other diners began, along with the familiar sounds of chinese discussion about us. several folks came to the table to look at me, look at hazel and look at me again. hazel meanwhile has climbed out of the high chair, spilled a bottle of water on me, flung the twinkie-like item that schell so nicely got for her into the pool of water that at that point had collected bits of rice, noodles and chopsticks. i was just about to have schell apologize to the waiter who had so patiently brought replacement items when i heard and then saw the man at the next table take a big snort and then “hawk a loogey” (as we used to say) onto the floor.

we wandered back through the city to the hotel in the humid neon laden night. passing by the park we saw a large group of women dancing to what sounded and looked a little like the chinese macarena. i would have loved to stay and watch but by then hazel had peacefully fallen asleep in the sling and i was ready to remove my sticky clothes and sleep myself.

*****
this morning hazel awoke and immediately began smiling and laughing. she crawled to the mirror and began kissing the baby in the mirror, this kept her entertained for quite awhile. she is blossoming.

from the sky

yesterday promptly at 3 oclock we were herded into our small van for the 10 minute drive to the civil affairs office. we arrrived and entered the incredibly humid, hot building to await the arrival of the babies. there were other things going on there too so it felt really chaotic. hazel arrived first followed by sam, and much later victoria. after getting all the papers together, the signing of the “harmonious period agreement” took place. sort of a trial run so to speak. basically i had to agree to take good care of the baby for the 24 hours before the official adoption and answer some questions about why i wanted to adopt from china, and what i could provide for this child. then it was back to the hotel for a meeting with the swi folks and more official business. hazel fell asleep in my arms in the van and would likely have slept for a couple of hours but we needed to have our photos taken. so i had to do what i hate to do - wake a sleeping baby! for this province, the photo needs to be in a “strong color” so she was zipped into a red sport-themed jacket for the official photos.

after we were done, coming back to the room, i could see in her face it began to dawn on her that something had changed. her sadness spilled out, and she made "the scream" face with streams of tears. she started to fall asleep- then she would open her eyes, look at me and begin to sob. tears running down her face, her whole little body shaking. i knew to expect that but its so hard to watch and not be able to explain to her what going on. she finally fell asleep exausted at about 5 pm and woke up for a bottle later but then slept all night.she woke up reserved, no tears but not many smiles yet either.

today was the official adoption as far as china is concerned. more chaos at the cival affairs office where i placed my official red thumbprint on the adoption decree and her red footprint was stamped on the papers to signify thier legality. then on to the notary for more questioning and paperwork and it was done. legal and binding i am her mother!

when miss chen said goodbye and kissed her before she left to return to yunxiao, i was overcome with emotion. i am so grateful to her for her care of hazel while she has been in the swi, somehow thank you doesn’t quite seem to cover it.

our hotel here in fuzhou is a 20 plus story glass monolith that seems to sway slightly. through the smog you can sometimes make out the vague outline of what are rumored to be beautiful mountains. yesterday while sitting watching hazel sleep after coming back from the civil affairs office, i noticed something floating outside our window. as it drifted downward i saw that it was money- twisting and spinning on its way from somewhere above us to the ground. quite sureal. rather like becoming a mother via adoption in a chinese city half way around the globe from home.

she is here!

here are a few photos of hazel. she is sleeping peacefully right now after some serious tears- think "the scream" by edward munch....

Fuzhou and the Fixed Stare

Fuzhou capital of Fujian Province. Port city amidst green, green mountains and the Taiwan straits-at least that is what the maps and brochures have told me. It is very, very grey here and hard to tell what time of day. Apparently this region is experiencing unusual rainfall, hence the gorgeous outdoor 6th floor pool has not been filled yet. By Fuzhouian standards it is not hot. Since I can't swim I think I will have a spa day in the hotel spa. Their menu is quite enticing. Hard to decide, but I have chosen "Charcoal Sauna Bath-It will clear away dust particles& poisonous substance, nourish your appearance and brighten your skin. Further more, it will kill the bacreria infecting your face, which is also a cure fir acne, rheumatism, arthritis, rosacwa,etc."(sic ) I may have to see what the obsession with ear cleaning is and get one here as it is also offered. I had to hold back in Tokyo from buying a plastic ear cleaner complete with light-I just didn't know who I would give it to and I thought those that didn't get one may get jealous.
We had a rough first few hours here as we are back to a big city with crazy hair raising traffic. Luckily we had seat belts and Mr. Shen's driving expertise. Our guide from Xiamen had warned us that he did not like this hotel as "the service is not good". That is our running joke. We heard the beds might be hard, well hard they are-like those pretty"comfy looking" display beds in department stores that are actually wood boxes-exactly that. We are sleeping on box springs. Great way to cut corners in a 5 star hotel, just buy box springs. Chris had me call housekeeping to get a non-down "piller" for myself(allergies) and tell them our beds were too hard. The solution? Feather duvets-the cushioning is unbelievable! Ha! Anyway, they brought me two more down pillows and another down quilt after they put the duvets on our springs. I donated all my feathers to Chris and she built herself a deluxe princess and the pea nest. We decided that we'd go to the department store for a pillow "zhen tuo" and padding. Our dinner, (in a private room that kept us from the constant stares) ended with a special dish of fish head in hot chili peppers and black bean sauce-it was actually quite delicious-well the chilies and sauce-mr. fish was rather carpy, muddy flavored, but the sauce was great. We then headed to the neon ladden department store to get some bed fixins. Schell, our new guide who speaks Mandarin, French and English is a great guy with a sense of humor and big heart. He has a British accent and is very easy to talk with. He found me a foam pad and was excited as it was only 280Y ($30) and he had recently bought one for 1000Y! I will give him mine when we go to Guangzhou which he is excited about. I then found a fantastic silk pillow for about 10 dollars which will be coming back to Portland with me! At the store we caused quite the commotion, groups gathering around to see the four foreigners-what did they buy? why are they here? Who gets to help them? Saturday night and the four floor department store was absolutely packed-10 to 12 people at every check out lane pushing thru and hundreds of mopeds lining the front sidewalk. This whole province sees very few foreigners, that is why we seem to get the ongoing, not try to hide it stares. In Xiamen as we walked along the waterfront (I later named the gauntlet) every single person turned their head away from the view and fixed eyes towards Chris and me...not a situation you can deal with for very long.
Today is Family Day-we will get Hazel in 4 hours!!!!!! "Not soon enough!" Chris just piped up. I am very excited and feel lucky to have already met her and made her giggle. I've got all my batteries charged and am ready to document all. I am so glad that I brought the video cam-Thank you Jana and John! I almost left it as we came over carry on only. Anyway, we are off to Wal-Mart-not our choice, but Schell wants to take us their. I think he really likes the shopping! I am so excited and grateful that Susan is here with us again. She is the adoption agency's Chinese representative. She is constant giggles and entertainment and a wealth of knowledge. We have made a deal to teach each other our native languages. With Susan you can get whatever you need or want and always best quality and best price. After Wal-Mart off Then to the Civil Affairs office to get baby Hazel or fondly known as "Basil" by my niece and nephew. Looks as though we will get to visit a few "very famous" temples, laquerware factory/shop and stonecutters. Those are things Fuzhou is known for. I can't wait to try "Buddhas jumping over the wall"-a special dish here. I have no idea what it consists of...
As I look out the 19th floor window, it looks like a cold November day, hard to compute that it is 89' and saunaesque. We are off-look forward to pictures of Hazel on the next post!

mr shen

mr shen
the driving rules and traffic in china are hard to explain. there appear to be no rules although i was reassured by our guide that there are rules, he just did not know what they were since he didn’t drive. the traffic in many places is terrifying with bikes, buses, cars, world war two looking carts and pedestrians all merging into a stream of potential collisions.

xiamen was very calm and being a city of only 1 million there really was not much traffic. it seems that most people take the bus there. coming to fuzhou, the situation is entirely different. a city of 6 million people all of whom seem to be out on bikes , motorbikes or recklessly speeding through the streets.

i was grateful to have mr shen as our driver, he was very good and not a risk taker. the first day in xiamen he picked us up in a small van with lace doilies covering the inside. it was standard issue china- with some extra fold down seats so that something that looked the size of a pontiac station wagon could actually hold 12 people. he was very stern and did not really smile at all. at each bathroom stop he puffed madly on “double happiness” brand cigarettes. ( i know this because being the oregonian that i am, i pick up litter when i see it.)

when we were at yunxiao, visiting the swi and meeting hazel his stern facade evaporated and he became quite animated. he tickled hazel and coaxed a few smiles from her. it turns out that he has a 20 something year old daughter and you could see that he was a kind man.

when he and our guide arrived to pick us up for the 4 hour drive to fuzhou, i saw the little van parked outside, but mr shen lead us instead to a brand new mazada with leather interior and strategically placed perfume bottles and a doily covered kleenex box. he gave me a huge smile and thumbs up. it was a real surprise and was quite comfortable.

the surprises just kept on coming. after navigating the unusual traffic jam in xiamen, he asked through our guide if we wanted to hear some music. “music is the universal language” said our guide. ?? huh?? not in my book...

we were then treated to a mix of chinese love songs, 80’s techno, 80’s disco and some jazzy chinese pop. at first i thought that the cd was a pirate because some songs were louder than others, but it turned out that mr shen was paying close attention to our reaction and when we appeared to be enjoying the music he would crank it via his steering wheel volume control. at one point it was hard to sing along to “i saw you and her walking in the rain” because we were snorting and laughing so hard.

when i asked for a second toilet stop on the outskirts of fuzhou he made a gruff- “what again?!” kind of sound and i just shrugged. out came his smile and thumbs up when i pantomimed that he could smoke.

he navigated the incredible traffic in fuzhou and delivered us safely to our hotel. i was sad to say goodbye to him, he definitely grew on me .

xiamen wanderings

yesterday we decided to have a low key day of exploring without a real agenda. there is a market close by that we had seen from the ferry that seemed a good place to begin. immediately on leaving the hotel, the heat was oppressive, much hotter than the day before. it is hard to explain the heat in a way that makes any real sense. sauna comes to mind, but it is so heavy with moisture that steam room is a better parallel.

we strolled down to the market streets , following one lane and then another, depending on which one looked more interesting. after bargaining for and buying some jewelry we got to the place where we were definitely the only Caucasians. the streets are sort of grouped in ”themes” one will be filled with stalls of fruit, one with vegetables ect.

we passed many stalls selling fish, with bowls of live sea creatures swimming innocently, not knowing what their fate would be. also stalls with cages of lizards, snakes and other reptiles. the frogs were neatly confined with straight jackets made of bamboo leaves. we came to an intersection where men were loading freshly killed pigs from a truck ( open sides carcasses hanging) onto bikes for delivery to the stall where they would be sold. after years of working at ottos as a teen, the site of a newly slaughtered pig was not new to me. however the casual slinging over the back of a bike bumping down the alley with the liver quivering was a shock. at that point we were both very hot and a bit queasy so it was back to the hotel for a siesta.

the evening adventure was another ferry ride to gulangyu. the heat had continues to build during the day, but the water had a breeze which made it more tolerable. i have always loved boats, ferry rides being among my favorite things. we joined the dressed up friday night crowd and commuters on the boat and made the short crossing to the island.

we decided to take a scenic tour of the island via golf cart . our driver was a chinese teen, and there was one other passenger. gulangyu is famous for several things- a piano museum, the art college, its colonial roots and its no motor vehicle status. the tour turned out to be perfect. the breeze made it very pleasant watching the scenery pass. there were many retirees out for evening strolls, along with tourists walking to see the sites. at one point our cart was signaled over to stop and a group of people tried to get our driver to take them on- but she declined. we stopped at a couple of places to take photos and all too soon we were back at the ferry dock. the heat had died down a bit and it was dinner time so we headed back to the hotel .

the green vines climbing over crumbling iron gates and walls, colonial buildings and the serene feeling on gulanyu have endeared it to me. its a place i would like to spend a few days, perhaps next time.

today it is onto fuzhou to meet up with the other families . mr shen will be driving us, and i am sure that the 4 hour drive will hold some more adventures.

Yunxiao-A Day in The Life of a Chinese TV Star

As we ate our first Chinese buffet breakfast-which I love, Chris relayed that rather than be confrontational, she would just let go and try and distract the guide with questions and possible excursions so we would be in Hazel's city as long as possible. With my documenting tools in bag, a great breakfast of fried noodles, bok choy, pork buns and juicy pineapple, we were off with Min and Mr. Shen in our lace ladden toyota van. Xiamen is like no other Chinese city that I visited. It is very clean and organized and obviously sees a lot of foreigners as all the roadsigns are in English and there is English in many of the stores as well. The traffic(fortunately) is much calmer and I am not scared to cross the streets. Our driver is not of the wreckless Beijing style and took the drive nice and easy. Fujian is mountainous and green and growing all of my favorite things; bananas, papayas, mangoes, lychee, tea. Hillsides are lined with beautiful terraces and groves dotted with brick houses amongst odd rocky outcroppings. Most fields have a water buffalo somewhere in sight, often on a rope being led by its' owner. On the Tongsan Expressway they have reststops and we stopped at a very nice one to check out the local tea. Oolong is the specialty here and as we sipped little cups we were shuffled around the store and given taste after taste of tea infused kumquats, nut brittles and a rather pasty unsavory cake. As usual there were 12 employees shadowing us and trying to get us to buy their goods. One woman just layed it out and told our guide who then translated to us "she recommends you drink this tea- you lose weight". Min then bought us the specialty of the teahouse-Green tea cakes. From my dissection they were taro or sweet potato encased in green tea dough with sesame seeds on the edges and then deep fried. They are really quite tasty. Onward-As we approached the city of Yunxiao, many phone calls ensued. We waited at the entrance of the city in a torrential downpour and I got my video camera all ready to go. The director Miss Chin arrived with driver and we followed their Citroen through red dirt pot holed streets of one story dwellings. Most people were on bikes or motorbikes wearing purple plastic rain ponchos. It was hard to see much as it was just pouring. It reminded me a lot of the finding sites of the girls on our last trip. We stopped at the Police station and I was perplexed as to why a policeman was needed, are we suspect? We soon found out he was a "friend" of Miss Chin and there to translate for her. He was definately sweet on MIss. Chin and obvious the feeling was mutual-a little romantic sidestory. The final 2 or so blocks to the orphanage were deep, deep potholes that I wasn't sure we'd actually make it through. The orphanage is situated on a river and is a rather grand beautiful colonial style building. There is a lovely garden with a stone mah jong table, tennis courts and a fountain amongst banana trees. We followed Miss Chin and entourage to a nice room. As I began to start photographing the policeman jumped up-I still had no idea why he was with us, but eventually his fondness for Miss. Chin overcame his fear of photos and he is in most of my video. Chris and I predict a marriage in the near future. I just videoed as Chris asked questions about Hazel and her life thus far. We were offered fresh lychees (of which I had no idea how much I loved), small peaches from the area and tea. Miss Chin was very open and honest. it was quite apparant how much she loved her job and all the children she takes care of. She is the youngest of a family of four from a Northern province. All at once a woman walked in carrying Hazel! Totally shocking and never in our wildest dreams did we expect to meet her. I couldn't even imagine how Chris must of felt-I was overwhelmed by the casualness of it all. What an amazing moment. I had been pondering on the way up how strange it would be to go to the orphanage and look at it and know Hazel was within the walls, but we not be ableto meet or see her. She was handed to Miss Chin and clung like a monkey-clearly a strong bond between the two. It was so great to see how loved she is by all involved. Obvious too that "York" the policeman had spent some time with Hazel as she was very comfortable with him and he knew her love of TV commercials! It was decided we would go to lunch together and Hazel was put down for a nap. Driving to lunch we meandered through one story buildings and dirt streets amongst tri-cycles in which we were told are the "public transportation" of the city. A person rides a bicycle which is attached to a seat on one wheel parallel with it. They were all enclosed with plastic to keep the rain out-very inventive. We arrived at the lunch spot which had a marble drive and fancy entrance between rather run down ramshackle little stores. We were hurried into a gold elevator and taken to the second floor where we ushered into a private room complete with a crystal chandelier and upholstery draped chairs with metallic gold bows. Within moments another woman arrived who was (we think) an orphanage official-Miss Chins boss lady. Then there was a big discussion amongst our guide, the two ladies and our driver (who I was relieved joined us as in the past the drivers always sat in their cars) as they thought we wanted American food. We had to do some serious convincing that no we did not want American food-only Chinese and the specialties of the region. Very quickly after our Tsing Tao arrived (we declined the Heineken) a feast ensued with women servers surrounding us. The lazy susan was filled with perfectly poached prawns, mussel tofu soup, noodles with chinese broccoli, tender asparagus, clay pot eggplant and of course a fried fish heag for each. The meal was finished with pineapple and watermelon. Just as we were leaving they asked Chris if she would be interviewed and she accepted. Back to the orphanage where the reporters were-we had newspaper in mind, they were from the TV news! Chris' fifiteen of fame and in China. She is the first American to adopt from this particular orphanage and the first to visit as well. In to the room and more waiting for another official. He arrived and held Hazel as Chris was interviewed-it was exciting for all, even our driver whom I assume had no idea what an adventure he would be part of! The official was called grandpa by the children and it was obvious Hazel was very dear to him. They are all perplexed as to why Chris would apdopt a baby with a medical problem, but so very thankful and happy for her bright future. The interview went quite smoothly and we were off. As we left we had fun playing with Hazel and getting great laughter from her. It was difficult to leave but so exciting to have had a pre-meeting and such a surprisingly positive and warm welcome from all of her people.
As we drove down the pot-holed road to the expressway, we saw Ghandi leading the way. A very old old Chinese man with a totally bald head leading his water buffalo on a rope walked on the side of the road. He was only wearing grey gym shorts and a green slicker-what a sight.
The drive back was totally different as the rain had stopped and we could really see the villages and the people and animals. To our hotel to decompress and revel in what an unexpected outcome to our trip to Hazel's birthplace.

yunxiao

when i adopted ruby in 2003, i had a 14 months to get ready for her arrival. i checked out lonely planet china. lets go china, fydors china and the rough guide to china from the library several times each. i read everything i could get my hands on about the great wall and besides getting ruby, that was my obsession. there were many other places that sounded intriguing- emeshan,lijiang, guilin, tibet. i was fortunate to be able to see and spend time in ruby’s places, being able to share that with her is a great gift.

coming to china this time, visiting hazels places became my obsession. i wanted to be able to get a sense of her beginnings- to smell the smells, walk the streets, look into the faces of the people. coming to xiamen was really all about being close enough to access yunxiao- her town. my goal was also to take photos of her orphanage and abandonment site. yesterday was the day we went to yunxiao and it was an emotional, amazing, wonderful, unexpected, journey.

we met our guide , min peng and driver, mr shen at 830 a.m. armed with water, cameras, extra batteries, snacks and the addresses of where i wanted to see we set off in our vehicle. leaving xiamen, we crossed the new suspension bridge that connects to the mainland that looks remarkably like the golden gate. heading south to yunxiao, i was amazed at how hilly fujian is. the port was impressive with lots of activity and there was a subtle familiarity to the happenings. we had been told that the drive was about 3 hours from her to yunxiao. i think our guide , min wasn’t quite sure what to make of us. the chinese often seem to have an agenda of their own when showing you china. they, like many of us i suppose, want to show you the very best of their cities and towns. its hard to convey that i didn’t want to see the sites, i wanted to see ordinary.

leaving xiamen we passed many big factories- mostly plastics i think, and a huge kodak facility. this is a ‘special economic zone” which means that there are no taxes and land is very cheap. i imagine that regulations are very lax as well. passing men jackhammering in a tunnel in flip flops with cigarette dangling confirmed that for me. as we got closer to yunxiao, the architecture of the villages and cities changed. we passed huge farms of tea, bananas and bitter melon. men and women in limpet shaped hats worked in the fields and seemed oblivious to the driving rain. i learned that there used to be a custom that if you were a poor family the roof of your house needed to be saddle shaped if you were rich it was swallow tail shaped. every village and small farm had a temple. some were big and some were simple one room shacks.

it was a virtual downpour when we approached the outskirts of yunxiao. min’s cell phone had been ringing off and on for the hour before our arrival. we stopped just outside the town to await miss chen, the director who was going to escort us to the orphanage. eventually a car pulled up beside us and the smiling woman was very young- in her 20’s. we set off down the narrow rutted road in the pouring warm rain. one stop to fix some sort of engine problem, and a stop at the police station where a policeman got in her car. passing bicycles, motor bikes and people walking we drove on. the road followed the river which was muddy and moving fast. we bumped down a short stretch of pothole to about 50 feet of new asphalt and the iron gates and gold letters announcing the swi.

we were told we would not be able to see inside or look around which was what i expected. i was hoping to take a few photos and return to the town to feel it and maybe do a little shopping. unexpectedly we were ushered into a small room, where we were offered tea and conversation. the policeman turned out to be sweet on miss chen and spoke pretty good english. his english name is “york” and his chinese name was yu. one moment we were just talking and the next moment a nurse brought in hazel and handed her to miss chen! i tried to hide my shock. she clung like a little monkey to miss chen. there is such obvious love and affection between them. at one point she handed her to me to hold and i was in a state of disbelief- i never in a million years expected to see hazel before sunday, let alone hold her. she immediately began to wail so i handed her quickly back to miss chen. i sat next to her and just looked at her.

she has brown hair, and two teeth just peeking through on the bottom. she is very fair and has a sweet little pouty lip that our guide says is that of a traditional chinese beauty.

i recovered my composure quickly and ms chen, using york as her translator asked me if i had any questions about xin yue. i asked the usual things- when does she eat, what does she like and when does she sleep. britta says that i looked and acted cool and calm, but i was working hard to maintain that cool. they brought out a basket of peaches and some lychee for us. the peaches delicious. eventually they asked us to have lunch with them. soon the york had to return the station, i was sorry to see him go- his easy smile and affection for miss chen were sweet.

a little while later we got in the van and drove to the town where we were taken to a fancy hotel for lunch. min and miss chen seemed nervous that we would not like the local food- when i reassured him that i love local food he began ordering a feast for us. soon after , miss chens superior joined us, miss jhang. the meal was a blur in so many ways. both were very interested in why i wanted to adopt this baby with a cardiac problem. although i am not sure of the actual literal translation, they said that i was kind hearted to adopt this baby. its hard to convey how much my children have added and will continue to add to my life but i attempted to explain that i am the one who feels lucky.

at the end of the lunch, they asked if i would be willing to talk to a local reporter. it seems that i am the first adoptive parent to visit the orphanage. when we got back to the orphanage, the camera crew was there. we were again ushered to the tea room where we were waiting for yet another official to come. he arrived and they brought hazel xin yue back to the room. after her nap she was much more comfortable with me and happily sat on my lap playing with my red thread kuan yin. once the official arrived the cameras began rolling and again i was asked about why i wanted to adopt this baby with a heart problem. the official who said that all the kids call him grandpa had xin yue on his lap at that point and had peeled a lychee for her which she was happily sucking on. he said ‘this baby is very smart , friendly and beautiful and everyone who meets her wants to adopt her but you were the fastest.”

when it was time to go, i said “see you sunday , drive safely”. and we returned to the van to begin our drive back to xiamen.

i don’t know why i was given the opportunity to meet hazel before the adoption and be so warmly welcomed by the staff at her orphanage, but i will be forever grateful. i know without a doubt that she has been well loved. i have seen and felt her hometown.